112: When We are Forced to Change Course
Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend,
Sometimes challenges - and opportunities - pop up in our life. What do you make them mean? I explore this in today's episode.
Your Empty Nest Coach
"Life isn’t a one way, smooth sailing go-kart course, or street. It has detours. It has bumps. It has U-turns sometimes. Yes, sometimes we change course consciously, by making a decision, or we change our mind. But other times, life forces us to change course for one reason or another."
Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.
⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓
An unexpected challenge - or opportunity - is in your life? What are you making it mean? Coach Christine discusses in this #Podcast episode #EmptyNest #Podcast #WomenEmpoweringWomen #Opportunities #Challenges
This Episode is Brought To You By
Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).
What You Will Learn in this Episode
- An Analogy for When Life Takes You Off Your Expected Course
Episode Questions for You To Consider
- How do you do when you are forced to change course?
- Will this analogy help next time you are forced to change course?
First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes
- The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast Trailer
- Series 1: Empty Nest Prep - starts at episode #3
- Series 2: The CEO of Your Life - starts at episode #64
- Series 3 (this one): The CEO Toolbox - starts at episode #88
- Thought-Box-Deliveries Start at Series 1 Above
- Episode 26: Changing Your Mind is Okay (Spider Web)
- Episode 29: I don't Know What to Do Next! What Should I Do With My Time? (Simmering)
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Episode 112 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast
Christine: Hi, it’s Coach Christine. This is my podcast; it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast. Today I discuss When We are Forced to Change Course, and it’s episode number 112. I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest. My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time? Is this you? I’ve been there, and I get it. Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion. I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you. This podcast is my gift to you.
Hello, my empty nest friend and CEO of Your Life! Let’s imagine for a moment that you are about to get into a gocart in an imaginary, miles-long track that you know very well. You put a helmet on, you take a moment to sit down properly. You place your feet where they are supposed to be, seatbelts are clicked in and you do your safety checks. I’m not sure what those are, as it has been a long time since I was in a go-kart.
Now, before we walk through what happens next, a quick reminder, that if you find yourself talking back to me at any part of this episode; if something resonates with you; or if you have a quick tip to share with my audience, please take the opportunity to leave me audio feedback either through SpeakPipe or my Google Voice number. You’ll find the information to do this in the description of this episode: on Apple Podcasts click “Details”; on Spotify click “See More”; on Overcast press the I for information button. Get the idea? You also may send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org. Of course, I always have full show notes with links to anything I discuss in the episode, and a full episode transcription on my website. Those reside at YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P (for podcast) and 112 (for this episode’s number). (YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P112). I can’t wait to hear from you!
Thanks! Thank you! It’s time to thank our sponsor. This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest. If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document. You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community. See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com. Click the GPS Support Flock button. See you soon!
Back to the go-kart. [Go-kart sound] Imagine that you are on a course that you know very well. It isn’t short, actually the reason you love this course so much is that you have it all worked out in your mind on the path you will take. This one even gives you some options, in portions of the course, which-fork-in-the-road you’ll take sort of thing. You are partial to one of the tracks and take it most of the time, but today, today you know there is a new segment that has been added and it will take you through a beautiful clearing that you’ve only heard about before.
You’ve done your research. You know exactly the path to take to get there. After all, you’ve seen the signs and construction over the last few runs, and you can’t wait to experience that new segment. Everythings ready, you start off. You feel the air rush past your body as you speed toward the route you love. Some lefts, some rights, some ups and downs, you’ve done your practice and leveling up on those to know exactly how to handle them. Those spin outs from your early days are a faint memory and you just keep going. There’s the waterfall you love driving by as you can feel a slight mist on your face. You turn the bend and know that the new segment is up ahead, but when you get there, you see that the new road isn’t ready yet. The no entry sign is still up and you have a lot to process in a split second.
We had a plan. We know where we want to go, but we can’t go the way we had planned, for whatever reason. Now, I’ve talked about this before. We have options in how we choose to react to the happenings in our life. Let’s imagine that for a moment we could freeze-frame where we are. We could stop our go-kart and make a scene. Well, we could even get out of the kart, knock down the barrier and keep going out of sheer stubbornness. Typically not the best option but it is an option. We could stop the gocart in a safe spot, regroup ourselves, feel the disappointment, take it in and then move forward.
We could be annoyed and give up go-karting forever, even turning the go-kart around and heading back to the beginning. That doesn’t sound like the safest option but you could do it. And then there is the option to see the barrier; it’s there for the time being, decide it won’t be there forever and keep going forward on your usual path. Since we are already imagining a course that doesn’t exist, and have freeze-framed it, I’d like to give you some insight on why the barrier is there. A sinkhole opened up overnight that no one had expected, of course. The course operators left the barrier up, but were excited to open up a route just a tiny bit further down the course that will still allow you to get to that new clearing while avoiding the sink hole. You couldn’t have known this. Actually, no one does, outside of the course operator who’s currently working on updating their website and letting their clients know.
Let’s go back to our freeze-framed options. Option 1 has us making a scene, using up a ton of energy, complaining about the circumstance. That’s energy we could have avoided if we had just kept going. When we get back in the go-kart, you are so busy wrapped up in the drama that we have created in our minds, that we don’t see the new opening. I would normally say, your Protector is in full control and throwing thought-deliveries in your house and you let it happen.
Option 2, that we discussed, has us taking a moment to take a breather in a safe spot. We regroup, work through our disappointment, but all while taking in the moment we see the new opening ahead that we wouldn’t have seen otherwise. Curious now? We get in our go-kart to check things out. This is you feeling the feeling, reminding your Protector who is in control and considering the thought deliveries that are available to you. Allowing you to move forward in a more peaceful place and open to new opportunities.
Option 3 was to give up go-karting altogether. We were so close, and that is drastic, plus we risk injury and accident driving the wrong way on the course. Goodness gracious. Option 4 has us seeing the barrier, and resolving quickly to be okay with it and keep going on the course we’ve always been on. Hey, it’s fun, anyway. While we miss the new opening, the sign was easy to miss, we get the notification as soon as you get back and have the opportunity to go try again with minimal drama.
How does this analogy resonate with you? Life isn’t a one way, smooth sailing go-kart course, or street. It has detours. It has bumps. It has U-turns sometimes. Yes, sometimes we change course consciously, by making a decision, or we change our mind. But other times, life forces us to change course for one reason or another. Sometimes there is a new opening right away, sometimes it shows up ages later, or never, but when we spend more time in the mental drama that our Protector would like us to spin in, then we could easily miss the beautiful moments we so desperately want, or that we never even expected could happen.
My beautiful friend, when you clear out the drama in your mind, you’ll gain power and time in your life that you wish you had all along. I talked a bit about thought-deliveries and your Protector in this episode. I mention these in earlier episodes, if you are curious to learn more, see my show notes for links on those. Also, this episode is similar to my Spider Web of Life concept that I talk about in episode number 26. In that one, the angle’s a bit more for when you make the decision to change. But either analogy could work for this. You know me, always looking for new analogies for this journey called life. Why a go-kart? Honestly, I have no idea. It popped in my head, and I went with it.
Of course, if you would like to dig into more detail with any of this, if you need accountability, or want me to cheer you on, all of this is included in my GPS Support Flock where you can comment right below the episode. The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, how do you do when you are forced to change course? And number two, will this analogy help next time you are forced to change course? Check your thought-deliveries, train your protector, become CEO, the Conscious Effective Olympian, of your life and always remember that you are amazing! See ya!
Still listening? I have some major things simmering in my mind lately. Is there anything simmering in yours? I’d love to know. And I can hear you now, “Christine, I’m simmering on everything it is 2020.” Well your recipe should be in great shape when this simmer is over! At least that is the thought I’m choosing to use for mine. Check out that simmering episode in the show notes. Simmer, simmer, simmer, simmer.