101: Free Empty Nest SuccessTraining – Why You Don’t Know What Is Next For Your Life

101: Free Empty Nest Success Training - Why You Don't Know What Is Next For Your Life

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

In this episode, I share the first portion of my free training: Why You Don't Know What is Next For Your Life, Psst... it isn't your fault. 

In the full training session, I share with you how I found success in the empty nest, you will learn a bit more about me, and I ask you to consider two types of women entering the empty nest.

Which empty nest mom resonates with you

Enjoy! 


Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"If you notice, CEO of her Life Sally also has badges, but these are her superhero badges!"

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

New podcast episode 🎙 A teaser of a new & free training for Empty Nest Success: Why You Don't Know What Is Next For Your Life 💚 #ListeningTo #MidLifeMom #EmptyNestMom #EmptyNest #NotSoEmptyNest #FreeTraining #WomenEmpoweringWomen

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This Episode is Brought To You By

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • To Consider That There are Two Types of Women Entering the Empty Nest
  • If You Have The Interest to Learn More About Becoming the Conscious Effective Olympian (CEO) of Your Life

💚  Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now:   https://www.speakpipe.com/EmptyNestCoach  or call/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

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FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 101 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

Christine:  You are listening to the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast with Coach Christine, episode number 101:  Why You Don’t Know What is Next For Your Life...Psst, It Isn’t Your Fault, and this is just a teaser.  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

Hello, my empty nest friend and CEO of Your Life!  Today’s episode is the beginning of my new free webinar.  We recorded it last Thursday and it is waiting for you right now.  So exciting!  

Before we dive in, a quick reminder, that if you find yourself talking back to me at any part of this episode; or if something resonates with you; or if you have a quick tip to share with my audience, please take the opportunity to leave me audio feedback either through SpeakPipe or my Google Voice number.  You’ll find the information to do this in the description of this episode: on Apple Podcasts click “Details”; on Spotify click “See More”; on Overcast press the I for information button.  Get the idea?  Of course I always have full show notes with links to anything I discuss in the episode, and a full episode transcription on my website.  Those reside at YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P (for podcast) and 101 (for this episode’s number).  (YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P101).  I can’t wait to hear from you!

00:01:51

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

00:02:34

Hi, everyone.  I’m Coach Christine, your empty nest coach and we are about to begin our session: Why You Don’t Know What is Next For Your Life...Psst, It Isn’t Your Fault.  Hello, amazing empty nest friend, this is our three-legged shelter cat, Lego, stealing the show.  Just like I had allowed everyone to steal my show over the last 18 or so years.  Now, I consciously let Lego steal the show, and I take care of myself.  But I didn’t always.  

00:03:09

Before we dive in, let’s make sure I’m not about to waste the next 25 or so minutes of your time.  You are in the right place if: you can’t figure out what is next for your life; you’ve spent the last 18 or so years doing everything for everyone else; ready to make a long-lasting permanent change in your life that will benefit you, your family and others.  If any or all of these apply, congratulations, you are in the right place.

00:03:40

You should have received in the confirmation emails a link to print out this PDF which you can use as we go through this session, or you can grab any piece of paper that you have handy and make sure you have a writing utensil.  I’ll tell you at the end how to claim one of these bonuses, should you sign up for the GPS Support Flock.  I’d like you now to consciously think about which one you would choose.  You have Weight Loss or Simplifying Your Life.  If you could pick right now, which one would it be, and write that down on your piece of paper.  Or would you pick both of them?  Totally valid answer.

00:04:24

Let’s talk about types of people.  There are types of people in the world, right?  When you think about vacations, there are the types of people who love being out in the woods, in nature, sleeping under the stars, sleeping bag on the ground, food over the fire, and then, there are the people who have to stay in five-star hotels where they have room service, a pool, all that fun stuff, right?  How about schooling?  You have people who are diehard public school families, and then, you have the opposite extreme, those who homeschooled before COVID-19.  Then, of course, one of the most famous types, dog or cat person?  In reality, most of us are somewhere in between.  But we find we identify a tad more closely with one than the other, possibly.  That may depend on the day, right?

00:05:18

Let’s consider mothers entering the empty nest.  At first glance, they look pretty similar.  Especially if you go with what is posted on social media.  One look at that social media account and you see how together they look, or how together they want you to think they are.  I would now like you to consider that there are two primary types of women entering the empty nest, and I’d like to introduce them to you.  Self-Help Sally and CEO of Her Life Sally.  As I introduce them to you, I want you to think about who you identify with, and how you identify with her, and who you want to identify with as you move forward in your life.

00:06:00

First, let’s meet Self-Help Sally.  She loves being a mom.  She loves her family.  She supports everything her family does.  She is an organizer of events, of things that happen in the family.  She uses all of her time to support others, to do things for them, and necessities for herself.  She’s even responsible for transportation, even if it’s not the actual driving.  She has the thinking of how to get them from place to place, or when they’re going to be home.  Self-Help Sally wears her family’s accomplishments like badges of honor, on her.  They are her identity.  Which is great when her child graduates, is in a rewarding career, or is incredibly happy.  But when her child fails a test, drops out of school, gets arrested, considers new career options, she wears those as if they’re hers, too, because that’s all she knows.  Then there are her thoughts:  oh, I need to call a friend; how do I support my child; how do I support my partner; I have to plan that event for my extended family; oh, I need food for that event; I’ve got to get my own doctor appointments in and she finds that there is just a tiny sliver of time left for her, with all this stuff.  Teeny, tiny, sliver of time.  Time, that on the rare occasions when she has it available, she looks to fill it quickly, rather than simply being alone with herself.  In that tiny sliver of time that she has left, Self-Help Sally’s looking for the next quick fix to solve her life’s problems.  She wants everything to miraculously feel better when she’s done.

00:07:47

She fills that sliver of time with manicures, having some coffee, coffee with friends, fixing up the house, doing some workouts, maybe binging Netflix, getting a makeover, taking a trip with a friend, having a bottle of wine, or maybe just a glass of wine.  Oh, maybe she needs a new partner.  Wait, if I talk to so-and-so, they don’t like that person either, and a little gossiping goes on.  These types of things.  Self-Help Sally thinks she’s helping herself when she’s doing them, but what she’s really doing is ignoring who she is.  She has no idea anyway, who that woman would be, so it’s just easier to stay busy.

00:08:26

How could she find herself in that small sliver of time anyway?  She’s sure she couldn’t, so she doesn’t even try.  If she really thinks about it, she’s got it better than her neighbor down the street, Janey Sue, so you know, she’s okay.  Now, of course, many of the things that Self-Help Sally has chosen to do with that sliver of free time, they’re absolutely fine.  Especially when they’re balanced in her life.  If she understands their place in her life.  I call it the top of her life’s toolbox.  The Bandaids, not the cure.  It’s when she expects these things to cure what ails her, that a feeling of unrest will settle into her life.  In this photo of a dam, it would be like you knowing that there are architectural problems with it, and instead of hiring an engineer and getting in the proper tools and resources to fix it properly, you decide that a cork from a wine bottle will do just as well, or maybe like 50 corks.  You take them and you start filling in holes in the dam.  Well, you and I know that those aren’t going to hold the dam.  But that’s kind of what Self-Help Sally’s doing.  

00:09:35

The cork is fine for a wine bottle, so there’s nothing wrong with it.  It’s just doing the wrong job.  What Self-Help Sally needs is a cure.  No more Bandaids.  Sally knows that her child heading out on their own means more free time for her, and she doesn’t quite know where to begin, or knows once she gets through her list of things she’s been putting off for years, then she won’t know where to begin.  How could she know what to do with her time, when she’s spent the last 18 or so years in roles supporting everyone else.  Let’s talk about how she really feels under everything.  Watch her carefully.  Tired.  No, actually, she’s exhausted.  She feels like a mom-machine doing everything for everyone else, only she’s not a robot.  When someone asks her who she is outside of her role as mother, she gives you this look.  When she thinks about the time that she’s going to have, she thinks she’s going to look a lot like this.  Which might be fun for, you know, half a day, and then what?

00:10:39

She wonders who she is outside of all the roles that she’s had.  When she thinks about it, does she even want to know who she is under those roles?  Because it might be kind of scary.  She thinks some days that she might want to do what she did when she was younger.  Remember that thing I loved to do?  Sometimes, that’s great, and other times, it just doesn’t feel the same way any more.  She also wonders if her partner and her are going to get along.  Self-Help Sally is a role-filler.  She’s completely covered who she is outside of her roles of mom, partner, school volunteer, employee, cat-litter cleaner.  You know, those roles.  This is the normal for Sally, and this is why she can’t figure out what is next for her.  She needs to know who she is, first.  

00:11:31

But none of this is her fault.  She was never taught how to manage all of this effectively, and in a way that would allow her to find who she is outside of her roles.  While she is really good at researching the next thing that’s happening in her life and navigating it for her family, but what about her?  I ask you now, is there anything so far about Self-Help Sally that you identify with?  What resonates the most with you?

00:11:57

Now, I’d like you to meet CEO of Her Life Sally, and CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian.  CEO of Her Life Sally has done the work, training her mind in a way that allows her to be strong, in a way she didn’t know before.  She has an internal GPS that guides her throughout her days.  She has a well-stocked toolbox for her life, and takes inventory of it periodically.  She chooses to go through life with a tremendous amount of self-love.  She understands what she has control over in her life and remembers how many things are outside of her fence.  All of this gives CEO of Her Life Sally a tremendous amount of peace.  Peace that she had never known before.  Now, if you notice, CEO of Her Life Sally also has badges, but these are her superhero badges.  Let’s look at one close.  Check it out.  These superhero badges are for: learning how to be kind to herself in her thoughts; for consciously choosing her thoughts; for processing through emotions; for training her Protector well; and managing things outside of her fence; for stocking her CEO tool box well, and more.  Now, I bet you’re wondering how I know so much about these two?  Well, my friend, I was Self-Help Sally, absolutely was.

00:13:25

Hi, friend, I’m back.  That was the beginning of this webinar, and I then talk about how I went from Self-Help Christine to CEO of Her Life Christine.  While I navigated to becoming the CEO of My Life, I have created resources for you to also become the CEO of Your Life.  If you want to learn more, please watch the entire webinar.  Check it out.  I have photos of my cat, of my family, and I can’t wait for you to learn more.  If you have any questions, along the way, ask me and I will be back next week in your feed.  Have a great day!  You are amazing!  See ya!

 [End]

[Bloopers / Still Listening]

[End]

100: Lessons Learned in Podcasting, Creating a Business, and Life

100: Lessons Learned in Podcasting, Creating a Business, and Life

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

Wow - episode 100!

I decided to celebrate this milestone by sharing lessons learned from podcasting, creating a business, and life. 

Enjoy!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Be In it For The Long Haul. Take the amount of time you think it will take, double it, double it again, and then triple it: THAT amount of time. If you are good with THAT amount of time to reach your goals, you are going to be well ready for the ups, downs, journeys, pivots, and changes needed along the way."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Wow: episode 100! In celebration, I reflect on best tips for podcasting, creating a business, and life. Enjoy! 💚 #listeningto #midlifemom #emptynestmom #emptynest #MomHelp #MomPodcaster #PodcastLife #Entrepreneur #LifeTips #Advice

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This Episode is Brought To You By

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • My Top Advice for Podcasting, Creating a Business, and Life

Quick Tip Submission

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Do any of these resonate with you? 
  2. Do you have lessons learned to share with others?

💚  Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now:   https://www.speakpipe.com/EmptyNestCoach  or call/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

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FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 100 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

Christine:  You are listening to the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast with Coach Christine, episode number 100: Lessons Learned, Advice I’m Glad I Took or Wish I Had Taken. I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest. My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time? Is this you? I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion. I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you. This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

Hello, my empty nest friend and CEO of Your Life! How are you doing today? I am super excited to have this celebration with you today. You know how I like to celebrate things. While I certainly don’t need a party or anything like that, I need to just stop and celebrate the fact that I have consistently put out podcast episodes. I have stayed true to future Christine and I’ve made it here to 100, which isn’t always the case with podcasts. There’s a lot of podfading going on. I’m going to talk a little bit about that today.  

00:01:25

But before we get started, a quick reminder, that if you find yourself talking back to me at any part of this episode; or if something resonates with you; or if you have a quick tip to share with my audience, please take the opportunity to leave me audio feedback either through SpeakPipe or my Google Voice number. You’ll find the information to do this in the description of this episode: on Apple Podcasts click “Details”; on Spotify click “See More”; on Overcast press the I for information button. Get the idea? Of course I always have full show notes with links to anything I discuss in the episode, and a full episode transcription on my website. Those reside at YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P (for podcast) and 100 (for this episode’s number). (YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P100) I still can’t believe it’s 100. Whoo Hoo! I can’t wait to hear from you!

00:02:15

Thanks! Thank you! It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest. If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document. You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community. See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com. Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon!  

00:03:01 

I would like to formally welcome K. Soane, PreKureMe Health Coach, in the USA, into our GPS Support Flock Membership Program. We are incredibly excited that you joined the flock and look forward to your flight to success.

00:03:19

I had a bunch of ideas on what to do with this episode and landed on doing a lessons-learned topic to share with you some things that I’ve learned since starting this podcast, and a couple other areas of my life. It’s a nice time for reflection for me and while they all may not apply directly to you, sometimes you never know what small bit of life-sharing will resonate with you. I am going to give you four lessons-learned in three areas: podcasting, business and life.

00:03:45

First up is podcasting.  Number one, your first episode won’t be your best. Not even close. If you are looking to podcast, please know, going in, that no one is happy with their first episode. You’ll want to redo your early episodes if you go back and listen to them. Just be prepared for that. Remember that done is better than perfection. Meaning if you’re waiting for perfection, or if I had been waiting for perfection, I honestly wouldn’t have an episode out at all, and here I am at 100. So just do it. Jump in and learn as you go. If you don’t believe me and you listen to a podcast of anybody, and they’re in over 100 episodes, go back and listen to their first one and see the difference.

00:04:32

Number two under podcasting: 100 Episodes is a big deal and you’re going to have a different voice at episode 100 than you did in episode 1. Do you know that most podcasters don’t make it past 7 episodes due to podfading? For real. Once the excitement wears off, there is a whole lot of steps that go into every single episode, and you get very little feedback. I’ve mentioned this before, in my episodes, that podcasting can be quite lonely. It isn’t like we have an audience right in front of us where we hear them cry, boo, cheer, laugh, and provide any feedback whatsoever, only a few gem of a human who create reviews for us or who give us a shoutout on social media, that’s really the only way that we get feedback. No going in if you’re a person who needs a lot of feedback. Podcasting might not be the best place for you, at least not initially, until you build that audience.

00:05:32

As I said, hitting 100 episodes is a big deal, if most don’t make it past 7. You get to 25, 50, and then 100, that’s a really big deal. Milestones are important. I remember someone said, I feel like it was Jess and Elsie on ShePodcasts, that they said that most podcasters don’t find their voice and get comfortable until episode 100, and I believe this. I’ve tried things. I’ve had new equipment, tried scripted, not scripted, guests, more guests, no guests. It really isn’t until now that I feel comfortable enough to hit record and not feel completely anxious every time. The anxiety is gone. I’m definitely more me and more comfortable behind the mic, and I’m more willing to just try new things. Change it up. Super fun.

00:06:21

Number three under podcasting, your show is your show. I share this with you because I often see, in some of the podcasting Facebook groups, people will be like, “Hey, I don’t know what to do.  I’m not feeling it anymore.  I think I want to change my topic,” or “I don’t want to have my podcast be weekly anymore.” Your show is your show. You can do whatever you want. That is the beauty of being, well yes, specifically, Independent Podcasters. We can do whatever we want. For a personality like mine, who I really like creative freedoms, but I like somebody to give me a project and let me run with it. I love podcasting.  I love being an Independent Podcaster, where I have full creative control over my show, whatever that means to me. Not only what it means today, but what it means to me tomorrow, what it meant to me yesterday, and those, all three things, can look different. I love that. It’s so worth the work. While yes, it is a lot of work, with your show being your show, you have complete control to change it when you want to or need to, and this is what I love most about podcasting, you sharing your voice with the world. With guests, without guests, with sponsors, without sponsors, you can make it what you want. You can change it 400 times if you want. Sure, people might get annoyed, like it’s a free podcast. Get over it. Really. People love to complain about free stuff, don’t they? Anyway, it’s your show and that is what I love about podcasting. I love it so much. So fun.

00:07:59

Okay, my final podcasting item: bad reviews are a milestone. This is really important if you are about to embark into podcasting or if you just started, or if you have a bunch of bad reviews. Remember, what this means is that it’s no longer only your friends and family listening to your show. You’re actually getting out there. Now, sure, you are going to have trolly people who say something about your giggle, or your laugh, that is just ridiculous. Especially women podcasters, we get stuff about our voices all of the time. But sometimes, those reviews are helpful; they’ll say something about your audio quality, or give you an idea. Take them all with a grain of salt, and remember that it means it’s not just your friends and family listening. Whoo Hoo! 

00:08:47

My next topic is starting a business and having future you in mind. Number one, be in it for the long haul. I’m really serious about this. When you come up with an idea for future you, and maybe it’s a business, maybe it’s a huge project, I want you to take the amount of time that you think it will take you to reach that goal, then, I want you to double it, double it again and then triple it. That amount of time. If you are good with that amount of time to reach your goals, you are going to be well ready for the ups, downs, journeys, pivots and changes needed along the way to reach that goal. The journey is so much fun anyway, or if it isn’t, it’s going to be this awful climb. Who wants that? If you are prepared for the long haul, you aren’t going to give up when six months of effort shows one or two true fans. You’ll see you have two fans you didn’t have six months ago. When a system you spent two months learning or pouring money into doesn’t work, you’ll know it was part of a greater learning process. Finding what doesn’t work is sometimes incredibly powerful, and finding that early is a godsend. So yes, be in it for the long haul.

00:10:04

Number two for starting a business: choose time or money. Look, building a business takes time and money. The less money you have, the more time it will take. The more time you have, the less money you’ll need upfront. Just keep that in mind. Take inventory of your resources, and move forward accordingly. Number three, the power in doing things yourself. I’m a firm believer in doing things yourself when you get started. Especially if money’s an issue. If you have the time, use the time to train yourself, to educate yourself, to build your website, so then, when you have the money to hire a web designer or someone to maintain it, you know what skills you’re looking for. I know the tech behind things. I know right away when a salesperson makes an offer to me, if it’s worth it to me, or not. Usually, the answer is, it isn’t. My business, right now, is me and a dear friend who helps me with podcast editing and post-production. So, I know the skills needed when I’m ready to hire out. I have checklists and documentation ready for those new hires too. I’m spending my time doing that. Just ask my helper. I do! Number four, let future you guide you. Truly so powerful. It’s so easy to have shiny-object syndrome as we create businesses, as we create projects, and unless you have your future self guiding you, you’re just going to jump onto the next shiny object, so let future you guide you.

00:11:38

The last topic is life.  Number one, your GPS.  So incredibly important if I could make you understand your GPS internally, like magic, I would do that. Because when you do the work to uncover the future work that inspires you, you won’t need to look outside of yourself for answers. Your internal GPS will be there with you always. Always. So use her. Find her and use her.  Okay? Rant over. Maybe.

00:12:09

Number two, slow and steady. Look, in life, the five years that you take to build your business, lose weight, or create something amazing, seems so far away now. I know, I know. But when you look back you won’t believe how fast the time went and how far you have come, so where do you want to be five years from now? You don’t have to do everything overnight. Number three, mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. You’ll make more progress when you aren’t afraid of them. Number four, nature. This is personal. I love nature. Be in it as much as possible. It grounds you, and rejuvenates you. I’m ending it there, because I’m off to celebrate. If you liked these and are interested in lessons learned in other areas of my life, like particular parenting areas or maybe from my homeschooling mom years, let me know!

00:13:01

Of course, should you want to discuss any of these more with me, I invite you to join the GPS Support Flock Membership program. I have a discussion space for every episode. Fly on over to YourEmptyNestCoach.com/community to join today, or send me a private message on the socials. You’ll find me @emptynestcoach. Message me with the words Flock membership. I’ll send you the link to learn more. See you online, friend!

[Music]

00:13:28

The questions I have for you in this episode are, do any of these resonate with you? Do you have lessons learned to share with others? If you do, make sure you send it in for a Quick Tip.

[Music]

00:13:43

Today’s quick tip has been submitted by Dale Troy. Had I been a tad more organized, I would have included her tip last week which was on your anxiety about your child heading back to school in the fall. Dale and I are on the same page, of course. Thanks for sharing your tips with us, Dale!

[Music]

00:14:02

Dale:  This is Dale Troy. I’m a college success coach and the founder of Crush College Stress. My tip today is for your college students who are at home, worrying about what college is going to be like in the fall. Some colleges have announced that they plan to reopen. Others have announced that they’ll continue with online classes, but many colleges haven’t even communicated their plan yet. It’s no surprise then, that your college students are feeling anxious, disappointed and even angry.

00:14:36

How can you help your college students? First give them some perspective. It’s always better to focus on what you can control, rather than on what you have no control over. Since reopening, continuing with online classes, or something in between, is the college’s decision, your college student shouldn’t be spending hours complaining or trying to figure out what will happen. It’s much better to be patient, be flexible, and be resilient.

00:15:05

Second, your college student should start thinking about what their goals are for the fall. If they’re going to attend college, they need to have the right attitude. The format may not be perfect. It may not be what they expected, but they can still get a lot out of the semester. The first step is knowing what they want to accomplish, what they want to learn, and what they want to experience. If they don’t have any goals, they won’t be able to take full advantage of what their college does offer.

00:15:33

Third, your college student should practice reducing their stress on a daily basis. There are many simple ways they can feel more calm and more in control. Here are some suggestions: practice guided meditation, using an app on their phone; write in a gratitude journal, three things they are grateful for each day; take a walk in nature, or listen to calming music with their eyes closed. If your college student implements all three strategies, I’m sure they will feel a whole lot better about their situation.

[Music] 

00:16:08

Well my empty nest CEO of Your Life friend, if you enjoyed this episode, I invite you to take a moment to subscribe to this podcast. It is free after all! As always, I provide content to make you think. My hope is that I am able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life. Don’t you dare let the world allow you to forget that you are amazing!  See ya!

[Bloopers]

[Still Listening?]

[End]

99: Anxiety Around My Child Going Back To School

99: Anxiety Around My Child Going Back To School

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

I know it is June, but with colleges beginning to announce their 2020 fall plans, I've heard parent concerns in all areas:

  • I hope they aren't online only!
  • I'm worried about them going back!
  • I'm concerned about it all!

Let's chat a bit about that today, and try an activity. 

Sample

Activity worksheet sample: available to print in the GPS Support Flock.

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"You have the choice to resist a situation or to process through feelings and move on. BUT, until you know what is ahead, enjoy where you are now."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Have anxiety about the fall semester for your child? Coach Christine has an activity for you! 💚 #listeningto #midlifemom #emptynestmom #emptynest #MomHelp #MomPodcaster #CollegeParent

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This Episode is Brought To You By

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • A New Activity To Try And To Consider For Your CEO Toolbox
  • To Use Presence As A Reset
  • To Work On Processing Through Your Emotions

Quick Tip Submissions

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Are you able to make fall plans for your family members as of yet?
  2. How are your thoughts about fall plans that may exist?

💚  Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now:   https://www.speakpipe.com/EmptyNestCoach  or call/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

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Join the Flock Created For You

"This program was truly a life altering gift. I am a kinder person to myself and a better person to others around me. I have a stronger relationship with my spouse. I have better work relationships. I have the most amazing relationship with my children. But most importantly, I have the best relationship I could have with myself. Thank you, Christine! " ~ Michele D.,  Membership Member & Program Beta Client


FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 99 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

Christine:  You are listening to the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast with Coach Christine, episode number 99: Anxiety Around My Child Going Back to School. I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

Hello, my empty nest friend and CEO of Your Life! I hope that you are able to gift yourself with time to work on finding your future self, work on clearing up your thoughts in your days, process through emotions and do the work to uncover your future self. You are so worth it. A quick reminder, that if you find yourself talking back to me at any part of this episode;  if something resonates with you; or if you have a quick tip to share with my audience, please take the opportunity to leave me audio feedback either through SpeakPipe or my Google Voice number. You’ll find the information to do this in the description of this episode: on Apple Podcasts click “Details”; on Spotify click “See More”; on Overcast press the I for information button. Get the idea? Of course I always have full show notes with links to anything I discuss in the episode, and a full episode transcription on my website. Those reside at YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P (for podcast) and 99 (for this episode’s number). (YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P99) I can’t wait to hear from you!

00:01:58

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon!   

00:02:46

As I record this, it’s mid-June 2020, some of our children know what their school has planned for them in the fall, some of our children do not. Some schools will be in session, in-person. Some schools will not: elementary, high school, or college. The anxiety around what could happen is real and if left unchecked, could add more stress to you and your household than you already have. In this episode, we are going to assume that your thought deliveries are out of control when you think about your child going back to school.

00:03:19

A couple of things to keep in mind is to please remember that no matter what is announced right now, more than likely your child’s school is still working out thousands of details to make it all happen, whatever the plan is. So if you only get an email with some dates, and a line that says “more details coming soon,” understand that in most cases, the details aren’t known yet, but you’ll know eventually. Also remember that even though it was announced (if it was), things can change. 2020 is the year of pivot, after all, isn’t it? so don’t be surprised if things change yet again.

00:03:57

Now for you, my friend, this is a perfect opportunity to work on training your Protector, on using tools in your CEO toolbox and to work on presence. I cover these in two series on my podcast and you’ll find the links to both in my show notes.  I could just leave it there and end the episode but, how about I give you a new activity to do, that if it works for you, you can add to your toolbox? I want you to discover your main thoughts about your child returning to school and to dig deep on whether or not they are true, and I want you to consciously consider if the thoughts you are having are worth having in this present moment.

00:04:40

GPS Flock Members, I’ll have a PDF for you in our space, if you would like to print it out. If you aren’t a flock member, you may use any piece of paper. At the top of the paper, I want you to write “Back to School.” Then draw two lines to section the paper into quarters. For each quarter I want you to write in the center, at the top of that box, an emotion that you are feeling. Do three of these and in the bottom left corner box I’d like you to write “Peaceful” at the top of that box, no matter what. I’m challenging you here, and I’d like you to write it down even though you may not feel that way.

00:05:16

For each box, I’d like you to then do the part of our CEO Analysis tool where we work through describing how the emotion feels in your body, whether it is positive or negative and give it a number from 1-10, gut reaction there. I’d also like you to consider if this box allows you to move forward in your life at all.  If it does, put a checkmark on it. If you only have one emotion that you’re feeling, that’s totally fine. You’ll have your emotion box then, and the peaceful box in the bottom right. Now, fill in the peaceful box. Pretend for a moment that you are peaceful, and imagine how you would feel if you felt that way. Fill in how your body would feel, whether it’s positive or negative and on a scale from 1-10.

00:06:04

When you’re done. I’d like you to turn the page over and walk away from it. If those emotions come up while you’re away from it, remind yourself that you wrote them down, and can jump into them at any time. But for now, you are going to be present. Go to a place where you can calmly focus on presence. If you’ve never done this before, start with only two minutes. If you’ve done it often, try five or ten. Focus on details of your body, your surroundings. Use all of your senses, or use a sense that you don’t think about normally, maybe it’s something you smell in the air. Look for details that you wouldn’t have noticed had you not gifted yourself with this time. You could look deeply at the wrinkles on your hand, and count them. You could smell the air around you. You could consider your posture and see if you can feel energy within your body. These are just examples. For me, I like to go outside, sit in the grass and look at leaves on trees.

00:07:07

When you feel you’ve had enough time, either go back to the paper that you had started, or if you feel peaceful and want to let it go at that, let it go. There really are no rules here. At some point, you’ll probably head back to that sheet. If you easily find yourself back in one of the emotions that you listed on that sheet, when you think about your child heading back to school, or not heading back to school, whatever the fall looks like for them, then give yourself permission to sit in that emotion. Know you are strong enough to get to the other side of it. Allow yourself the gift of processing through the emotion. While you are in this emotion, see if you can find the primary thought that is causing it for you. Write down the thought if you do. Put it right in that box. Then ask yourself if the thought is true, and is there anything in this moment that you can do about it? 

00:08:05

When you feel you’ve gone through the emotion, and feel you can move on, either gift yourself with more presence, as like a break, or head to the peaceful box on that same page, and write down a thought that you can believe that moves you to more peaceful than you are now. It doesn’t have to be fully peaceful. You’re just taking a baby-step forward.  So write down a thought that you can believe that moves you to more peaceful than you are now.  These baby-steps are powerful. 

00:08:38

Work through this page as you feel led, giving yourself permission to sit in the emotions that you feel, to adjust as you progress, and gift yourself with presence time when you feel confusion about the topic. When you begin to look at the page with clarity on thoughts and can begin to see action items, turn the page over and write the action items down. Any action item should be placed on your calendar with a time to do it, meaning, I’m going to do this on Tuesday, and give myself an hour. Recognizing that that is enough in this moment.

00:09:13

Let’s be real for a moment, none of us knows what the future holds. I think 2020 has proven that. Could your child get the coronavirus and bring it home? Yes, and also no. Both are a possibility. Educating yourself and your child on best practices is about all you can do. Unless your child never leaves the house, the possibility is there, school or no school. Could your child’s school be all online? Sure, it might be, but I know you and your child will be able to handle the change if it comes to that. It may not be what you want, or what they want, or what anyone wants, but life isn’t guaranteed to be what we want. It isn’t guaranteed to be easy, either. Look, life is going to have things that aren’t pleasant. It happens but why live in those moments before they happen?  They might not even happen.

00:10:06

You have the choice to resist a situation or to process through feelings and move on. But until you know what is ahead 100 percent, enjoy where you are now. Enjoy your children being home, if they are, because I’m willing to bet that if they’ve been home for months on end, they aren’t going to rush home anytime soon once they are able to leave.  Prepare the best you can, but also find peace where you can. Allow yourself the gift of feeling your feelings. You are worth it. Keep in mind that your worry over what may happen isn’t helping anyone, especially you. So rather than living in the what-ifs, live in the now with conscious time spent on how to move forward. 

00:10:52

Of course, should you need assistance with navigating your thoughts with this, I am available to the GPS Support Flock Members in multiple ways:  workshops, group support calls, forum questions and more. I have created an online quiz for you to discover if the Support Flock is a good fit for you. If you are curious, fly on over to YourEmptyNestCoach.com/community for the quiz and another community option for my podcast listeners. Or send me a private message on the socials. You’ll find me @emptynestcoach. Message me with the words “Flock membership.” I’ll send you the link to learn more. See you online, friend! [Music] 

00:11:33

The questions I have for you in this episode are: are you able to make fall plans for your family members as of yet? How are your thoughts about fall plans that may exist? [Music]

00:11:52

My Empty Nest friend, we have two quick tips coming to you from a couple of my 2020 Quick Tips Team members: the amazing Susan Stevens and Deirdre Dolan Nesline. You’ll absolutely be able to tell that they both submitted these tips before social distancing. But, here’s the thing, podcasts are out here for a long time, so my hope is that one day they both will make perfect sense again. As I record this, hair salons aren’t allowed to be open. I’m desperately waiting for Susan’s to open so I can get my hair cut. Anyway, thanks for your tips, Susan & Deirdre! [Music] 

00:12:28

Susan:  Susan Stevens, passionate, professional hairstylist, 25 years. My best anti-aging advice, book a consultation at a salon for a new style. Get your hair cut, add some color. Talk to your salon professional about using a dry shampoo and not shampooing every day. Spring is around the corner, and change is truly empowering. [Music]

00:12:54

Deirdre:  Hi, it’s Deirdre from Declutter by Deirdre, and the Magnificent Aging podcast. My tip for this month is donate your gardening equipment and the tools that you’re no longer using to a volunteer chore service or an organization like HomeFront or Habitat for Humanity. Big and small workable tools that will help them restore someone’s home to a clean, safe dwelling are appreciated, and bonus, if you’re lonely or bored, volunteer with some of these organizations and make some caring friends.  Thanks so much for listening. I appreciate you. [Music]

00:13:42

Christine:  Well my empty nest CEO of Your Life friend, if you enjoyed this episode, I invite you to take a moment to subscribe to this podcast. It is free after all! As always, I provide content to make you think. My hope is that I am able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life. Never forget, my friend, that you are amazing! See ya!

[End]

[Bloopers / Still Listening]

[End]

95: Quick Tips Team: More Than Three Minutes of Planning, Shoes, Whales and Shampooing Through Lockdown Loneliness

95: Quick Tips Team: More Than Three Minutes of Planning, Shoes, Whales and Shampooing Through Lockdown Loneliness

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

We are back with another Quick Tips episode with some 2020 Your Empty Nest Coach Quick Tips Team members and a special guest. Enjoy!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"If you have a quick tip to share with listeners of this podcast, I would LOVE to share it with them! See this episode’s show notes for a link to record your audio submission for this podcast either through SpeakPipe or by calling (or texting) my Google Voice number.. Happy recording, friend!" 

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Check out this episode of the Your @emptynestcoach podcast 💚 featuring quick tips from @DClutterDeirdre @MagnifMidlife @ThePlannerFreak @goodgirlstalk & others! #emptynest #EmptyNestMom #ListeningTo#QuickTips #Advice ➡️ 

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Join the Flock Created For You

"This program was truly a life altering gift. I am a kinder person to myself and a better person to others around me. I have a stronger relationship with my spouse. I have better work relationships. I have the most amazing relationship with my children. But most importantly, I have the best relationship I could have with myself. Thank you, Christine! " ~ Michele D.,  Membership Member & Program Beta Client


FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 95 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

Christine: It is time for a Quick Tips Tuesday episode of the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast. I am your host, Coach Christine, and this is episode #95  of my podcast. 

[Music: Intro]

00:10

I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest. My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time? Is this you? I’ve been there, and I get it. Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion. I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you. This podcast is my gift to you.

00:47

If this is your first time listening, I invite you to check out my Friday episodes, as well, where I provide bite-sized coaching assistance to guide you along your empty nest transition years - should your nest be not quite as empty as you expected it to be, be sure to check out my twelve episode Not-So-Empty-Nest series that was produced during the start of my social distancing. I hope you and your family are healthy and safe, and that yes, even now, in a world of restrictions, that you discover how amazing you are and find excitement at a level you didn’t know is possible for your years ahead. 

00:01:21

A reminder that a list of all of the Quick Tips Team members and their contact information may be found on my website YourEmptyNestCoach.com - look for the Quick Tips Team button  - or menu - on the home page. 

If you have a quick tip to share with listeners of this podcast, I would LOVE to share it with them! See this episode’s show notes for a link to record your audio submission for this podcast either through SpeakPipe or by calling (or texting) my Google Voice number.. Happy recording, friend!

01:50

But, Christine, where are the show notes? Well, that might help you, huh? You’ll find those in the description of this episode - on Apple Podcasts click, “Details”; on Spotify, Click “See More,”: on Overcast press the I for information - button - Get the idea? 

Or, of course, visit my website for full show notes with links to everything we discuss in this episode and a full episode transcription - those reside at your empty nest coach dot com forward slash p for podcast and 95 (for this episode’s number). I can’t wait to hear from you.

02:23

[Music: Sponsor Music] 

Thanks! Thank you. It’s time to thank our sponsor. This episode is sponsored by my membership community, the GPS Support Flock: Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest. If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest, our GPS Life Principles document - you will also have the opportunity to learn about our community. See the link in this episode’s show notes, or fly on over to my website YourEmptyNestCoach.com. Click the GPS Support Flock button. See you there! 

03:09

First up today is Jo Davies our Humorous Observations expert: 

[Music: Guest Intro]  

Jo: So we all know Christine is an authority on the whole ‘back to college thing’, and for me, this whole lockdown feels a bit being back at school. You’re forced to be somewhere you don’t necessarily want to be. I mean, I love my home, but I don't want to be in it all the time and somehow being made to stay at home feels completely different from just choosing to stay at home.

Have to spend all day everyday with the same people. This was a good thing for me at school because I loved my friends, and thankfully I love my family so happy to get to spend this time with them.

You do sports every day: to try and stay fit and also because it's actually a fun thing for us all to do together and gets us outside if we’ve been in for too long.

We seem to be learning something everyday. Not necessarily maths and English, but patience and calm and also in my case that after 10 loaves, I still can't make a baguette. I’ve also learnt that if you live off cake mix and then cake, you will get fat....who knew? My kids have learnt that if you leave things on the top of the dishwasher they won't get clean and that the same applies to leaving washing on the floor by the washing machine.

I have learnt that Duolingo thinks that I am 6% Spanish, but no one else does and that 6% is about as Spanish as I’m gonna get.

04:19

I have learnt that Zoom feels like magic and the best invention ever for about 2 goes and then it turns into the worst TV show ever.

The other thing that reminds me of the school is that there are cheats. There are people that feel the rules don't apply to them and there are some that bend them and some who go so far as to break them completely: visiting friends, driving to parks, to going for a walk, getting together in groups. And just like in school, I seethe on the inside, anger bubbling just below the surface and my 15-year-old’s desire to be cool and liked and appear laid back resurfaces and I just smile and say ‘whatever’.

I am looking forward to the school holidays. To being able to go out and do whatever I want to do when I want to do it. I feel myself turning into a teenage rebel and in some weird role reversal, I fear it will be my children who restrict my movements as they try and keep their ‘ageing parents’ (Their words, not mine) safe from whatever comes next.

05:09

[Music: Guest Intro]  

Rachel: Hello! Rachel Lankester here, midlife mentor from MagnificentMidlife.com. My top tip today is to be a bit more whale. There are two creatures that go through menopause: human females and whales. When whales go through menopause, they become the leaders of their pods. Often, for fifty odd years! We can also be more useful to our communities as leaders than as breeders. 

05:41

[Music: Guest Exit]  

Susan: Susan Stevens here with your beauty tip. Do I need to swap shampoo with the seasons? In the summer your hair has to defend itself against more enemies, such as the sun, sea salt, excess sweat, and chlorine, so switching to a gentler shampoo can help to keep your hair soft without stripping it of its natural oils. Especially at this time when essential workers are shampooing and cleansing more often, you definitely want to use a more mild shampoo, and definitely lots of conditioning. A Little Roomie for Your Soul: “Surrender. If you are a seeker of union, find your place in the heart of nothingness. While still in the cage of your being, behold the spirit bird before it flies away. Since you were once drunk on eternity, pick up the sword of now, and strike the ego. Remove the dregs of separation. 

Become pure so the cup of  true reality can be filled with the pure wine of spirit.

06:37 

[Music: Guest Exit]

Christine: Susan just shared an excerpt from the book Rumi’s Little Book of Life: The Garden of the Soul, the Heart, and the Spirit. I will put a link to it into my show notes. Thanks, Susan! 

06:50

[Music: Guest Intro]

Gretchen: Hi. This is Gretchen Hoffmann, your Planner Freak. Today I just wanted to take a minute to share a really cool planning technique that I heard about recently from an old college friend. My friend Joan and her husband recently moved to New York City after selling the home where they had raised their children. Both of their kids are all grown up and now like so many of us they’re Empty Nesters. She and her husband Robert decided they wanted to spend a few years soaking up city life before they decided on their next move. Now, Joan has always been one of the most organized women I know. She is never late for an appointment, she never forgets a birthday, she has enough time for work, travel, exercise, and to spend with her family and friends. She really is Amazing!

07:39

You know what the most amazing part to me is, though? In  spite of everything she has on her plate she never seems frazzled, she always seems in control. She’s fantastic!  I, on the other hand, sometimes seem to be chasing my own tail because, although I am a good multitasker, it’s often difficult for me to stick with my main priorities for the day. Because of this, I am absolutely fascinated by how people do organize and plan their days. I spend a lot of time thinking about it, and helping people to plan their days. 

08:10

I  recently asked Joan what her trick was and I was actually surprised by how simple it was. She told me she keeps a paper planner on her desk where she writes everything down that she has to do and then she schedules everything on its own specific day. Then, here’s the important part, every morning she picks out the three main things she needs to accomplish that day. It can be personal or work related but she always keeps it to three. These are her key action items and she assigns them numbers in her mind … one, two and three. Simple enough, right? Then as she goes through her day and completes each of the three items, she mentally checks off that number in her head. So once number one is done she moves on to number two -. You get the gist. This technique allows her to concentrate only on her most important tasks and it really gives her a feeling of satisfaction at the end of the day. Anything else she gets done that day is icing on the cake. But the really great part is she rarely has to move priority items from one day to the next in her planner. I feel like I am always moving one or two items at the end of the day to the next day’s schedule. Now I’m wondering if any of you have ever tried this technique and if it worked as well for you. Remember, “Plan your day, Love your day!’

09:25

[Music: Guest Intro]

Jenn: Hi, this is Jenn Musselman, your wardrobe/closet coach and I’m here for your next tip. The tip is shoes: shoes always, always, always set the tone for your outfit. Let’s think about it, I’m going to give you two pretty extreme different examples but keeping in mind the shoes, think of a nun, and think of a showgirl or a Rockette. Shoes make the outfit. I know, these are a little bit extreme examples, but it is true. So, think about wearing your favorite basic chunky sweater and your favorite pair of jeans, but pair it with a really cute glittery flat, a glitzy flat, a fun pair of funky converse sneakers. Shoes set the tone for the outfit. It’s the best accessory you can have. That’s my tip for today. 

[Music: Guest Intro] 

10:24

Deirdre: Hi, it’s Deirdre from DeClutter By Deirdre and the Magnificent Aging podcast. My hint for this month is banish loneliness. Call someone at least every other day. Go out into the world, and talk to people, Join a club: they have boating clubs, gardening clubs, card playing clubs, square dancing clubs - pick an interest and get involved. Get out there. Make it a point to engage with people. You won’t want to declutter if you’re lonely. Make some friends, engage people that you haven’t spoken to in a long time. Thank you so much. I appreciate you. 

11:12

{Music: Guest outro]

Christine: So, I bet you can guess that Deirdre sent me this wonderful tip, pre-pandemic. She’s way on top of things, but her advice still stands. Sure, the groups may be online but the advice is great! You can research clubs to join now and see what they offer virtually. You can call others or meet with them online - this is a great time to meet others virtually in an area of interest. Let us know if you come up with a unique idea here, too.

And next up is Katherine, the 5 Kilo Traveler - another wonderful human who sent me her tip, pre-pandemic, so the focus is on flying and how to pack light when flying. This is a great opportunity to make plans for lighter travel for when we are able to do so again. So, as you listen, think how you will travel in the future. 

 12:05

[Music: Guest intro]

Katherine: My last tip was to take less and to achieve this with a mix and match wardrobe - and I mentioned travelling to New York in winter and wearing layers. Quite surprisingly I did go to New York with just 5 kilos (11 pounds ) of gear. How, you may ask? Well, I wore my heavy and bulky gear on the plane, and that’s my tip for today – when flying wear your bulky and heavy clothing (not that anything is overly heavy in my bag).

Now I’m not talking about wearing a big coat and filling the pockets with everything in your bag –although there are coats out there for this purpose – personally, I can’t think of anything worse. I’d look like the Michelin Man – ridiculous!

12:54

So my trick is I wear my heavier and bulkier gear. I wore my boots on the plane as they take up so much room in my small bag – and I didn’t really take them off the whole time I was in New York. I wore my long and thickest socks on the plane too.

My long wool coat I carried and used as a blanket on the plane, which was just luxurious. I wore my pashmina too – and I so pleased I did as the plane temperature cools down on long-haul flights – I guess so you can sleep – but I was nice and toasty warm. My puffer jacket packs down quite small in my pack but I actually use it to wrap it round my neck as a travel pillow while flying – I go for practicality over fashion when flying for 16 hours from NZ.

I also wear a lot of merino or smartwool. It’s great for planes because it keeps you warm but you don’t overheat with it. I’ll tell you more about merino in my next tip session. So, yes, wearing your heavy and bulkier gear on planes will reduce the weight of your carry on bag. Have you given it a go yet? Happy light travels!

14:05

[Music: Guest outro]

Christine: Thanks Katherine. Next up is a guest submission who is back for a second time - the amazing Leah Carey. Enjoy..

[Music: Guest intro]

Leah:  Hi! I’m Leah Carey from the Good Girls Talk About Sex podcast. If you want a different kind of touch from your partner but you’re not sure how to ask for it without hurting their feelings, try the Three Minute game. It’s easy, quick, and fun!

Have your partner lay down. Tell them that you are going to touch them any way

that they desire for three minutes and their only job is to tell you what they want,

then lay back and enjoy receiving it. Ask them, “How would you like me to touch you for three minutes?” Start a timer for three minutes and do EXACTLY the thing they asked for. If they ask you to change the touch, do what they ask, but resist the urge to do ANYTHING other than what they’ve asked for – don’t get fancy!

When the alarm goes off, switch places and repeat. Now, your partner asks you,

“How would you like me to touch you for three minutes?” And this is where you describe to them EXACTLY the kind of touch you would like.

I suggest the first few times you play, you keep it PG or PG-13, and leave the R rated sessions for once you’ve both gotten really comfortable clearly asking for what you want.  And then, if you like what you get, give them lots of positive reinforcement. Say later that night, “I loved the way you touched me earlier.” The next day, you could say, “I’m still thinking about the way you touched me yesterday.” And then the next time you’re getting frisky say, “Remember the way you touched me during the Three Minute Game? Would you do that again?” And don’t forget :they’ve now given YOU exact directions for what they enjoy, so use them! Here’s to your better sex life!

16:25

[Music: Guest intro]

Christine: Thanks for visiting with us again, Leah, my listener if you like what you just heard, Leah has a podcast created with so much more! Definitely check it out. 

My tip for you today is short and sweet: take a deep breath in, right now - go ahead - let the breath out - and on your next breath in, say to yourself, “I am amazing.” Then breathe out. Now do that for as many times as you need to begin to hear yourself saying it without any push back. 

17:03

[Music: Back to Christine]

Those are our tips for today. I am thrilled you listened!. If you enjoyed this episode, and want the next quick tips episode to make its way to you in your favorite app, take a moment - right now - to subscribe to this podcast - it’s free, after all!

Don’t forget that I have contact information for all of my 2020 Quick Tips Team members on my website! Be sure to click through, follow your favorites on their website - or social media pages -  and let them know you found them through this podcast!

17:32

[GPS Support Flock Thank you music]

Thanks! Thank you! A huge shout out to every member of my GPS Support Flock. I invite you to fly on over to my website or see my show notes for a link to learn how you may become a GPS Support Flock member where you will gain access to all of my programs, monthly workshops, group coaching, and more. See you there!

If you are able to do a screenshot of this episode now and share it on social media to help others to find it, that would be super helpful to me and the team. Tag me @emptynestcoach so that I may thank you. OR if you can think of one other person who would enjoy this podcast, please, don’t keep it a secret.

And should you be a regular subscriber to this podcast, can you take a moment and leave a five-star rating and review? That would be lovely!

18:27

[Music: Outro - fade out]

Of course, my amazing empty nest friend (or not so empty nest friend), always  remember that YOU ARE AMAZING!

18:36

Bloopers

18:51

Still listening? I recently slept outside on my deck. I love to camp solo - or with a few amazing women. Since I can’t do that right now, I decided to camp on my deck. No family members joined me and I am totally okay with that. Have you done anything like that recently? 

[end]

80: Deirdre Dolan Nesline Decluttering in the Not So Empty Nest Number 8

80: Deirdre Dolan Nesline Decluttering in the Not So Empty Nest Number 8

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend!

In our Not So Empty Nest series, today, Deirdre Dolan Nesline of DeClutter by Deirdre shares some things that you can do for future you when you have extra time at home. 

I hope your family is safe and healthy!

Take a listen or read the full transcript below.
 
⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don’t miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓
 
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What You Will Learn in this Episode 

    • Things You Can Do When You Have More Time At Home
    • How to Remove Photos from Sticky Albums
    • Setting Up Your Paperwork
    • Time Management Tips
    • And More!

Announcements

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now:   https://www.speakpipe.com/EmptyNestCoach  or call/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources


Full Transcript

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.