143: 5 More Things To Remember As Your Child Graduates from High School
Hello, my amazing friend!
Your Empty Nest Coach
"Yes, we’ll always be their parent and will jump in when needed, can offer advice and such but it is time for them to become who they are meant to be in this world, not who we want them to be."
Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.
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@emptynestcoach 's podcast episode today: 5 More Things to Remember as Your Child Graduates from High School
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Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers
- 00:41 Quick Reminders
- 01:04 5 More Things to Remember as Your Child Graduates from High School
- What is with the Daily Episodes? Here is the Explanation: The Daily Experiment, Your Empty Nest Coach Style: My Wish For You Today & New Things
- What’s New: 1:1 Coaching Open Spots
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- Series 3: The C.E.O. Toolbox
- College Topic Podcast Episodes
- 30-Day Challenge to Empty Nest Success - Videos
- Empty Nest Syndrome Podcast Episodes
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The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 143
Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #143. If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve used in prior episodes - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian. You’ll do this by leveling-up
your life in small increments - those small wins add up to big changes.
I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode today. Here we go…
[short intro music]
Some quick reminders: You’ll find a ton of information, resources and more on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com. I love feedback on the episodes - see my show notes for how to contact me - and if you enjoy this podcast, don’t forget to follow this podcast in your favorite podcast player. SupaPass, who powers our online community, (that’s coming soon) is our fabulous episode sponsor.
[computer game level up music (short)]
In my last episode I shared 5 Things to Remember as Your Child Graduates from High School. Today we’re going to talk about 5 More things, and of course, this list is not exhaustive. What would you add to these?
We start today with
Number 5: Is College in Their Future? Start Prepping Now.
If college is in your emerging adult’s future, they probably have decided on where they are headed. This is a great time to look for checklists for your kiddo - the dorm essentials of course, but also, what forms will you need to fill out, how will medical appointment works when they are away at college - should you need them, need new bedding - many dorm beds are not a standard twin size - check that now because they tend to become hard to find in August. Also consider what foods can they stock in their dorm room to get them through study breaks and sickness.
Number 4: Begin Transitioning into a Coaching Role.
Yes, we’ll always be their parent and will jump in when needed, can offer advice and such but it is time for them to become who they are meant to be in this world, not who we want them to be. Be their safe space, my empty nest friend. If their dreams are aligned with your dreams for them, that’s fantastic but more than likely that won’t happen. Work on your thoughts about their future and use those listening skills and ask when they want advice rather than demanding they do something because that is the way it should be. No one likes to be controlled like that and conversations always work better than demands. Your child is your child. Ideally, you love them no matter what career they choose, no matter who they choose to love, and how they choose to live their life. Lead with love and provide a safe space for them to figure their life out - for as long as you can. Do I really need to tell you that if their life is in danger, of course you are going to step in. But when you rarely step in, your actions and words will have a greater impact than if you just had a similar emotion about maybe their music choice.
Number 3: Prepare for Change, Warning: Strong Emotions May be Ahead
You are in a transition now. Change is inevitable and just when you get used to one change, it’s going to change again. You know, just like parenting up until this point - it keeps going. Every time your child leaves home and moves back home, you have the opportunity to learn who they are all over again - to discover how they’ve changed. You could spiral into a ball of sadness over the younger years being gone, or you could notice when you have those moments of missing youth, tell yourself, “it’s okay I feel this way, but I don’t want to miss who is in front of me now.” and move forward. You’ve got this, you can handle it and yes, be aware that strong emotions may pop up when you least expect it. See those emotions, feel them and know you’ll get through them. I’m cheering you on! Enjoy the journey.
Number 2: Have fun!
With all of the celebration, the life skill learning, and adjusting to the transition it is easy to focus on the checklists but to miss having fun in the simple moments of life. Don’t miss those. Make time to have fun along the way.
Number 1: You’ve earned it.
My listener, raising a human is no joke. No one trains us for all of the things that you have had to navigate over the years. Sure we have resources we can find if we have access to them. Sometimes we have great parents, friends or mentors that help out but in the end, you did the daily grind, the feedings, the sleepless nights, the navigation of a school system, the anxiety over how they might be treated, and well, I could list things for the next day and I wouldn’t be done. My friend, you’ve earned a celebration for yourself - maybe not a party - but definitely do something to commemorate their graduation for you. Well done. No, you aren’t done parenting but you made it this far and keep in mind it isn’t guaranteed to us as parents to experience this moment for a plethora of reasons. Be grateful, be proud and be you while allowing your child to be them. Congratulations, you’ve earned it.
I’ll be back tomorrow to share some thoughts about our daughter’s college graduation and we’ll also talk about resetting ourselves, since it’s Sunday, for the week ahead. Remember, I have 142 other episodes available for you to catch up on or relisten to when you are possibly driving, doing chores or taking a walk.
My amazing empty nest friend, don’t you dare forget that you are amazing!