60: Quick Tips, Your Empty Nest Coach 2020

[Music: Intro – fades out]

It is time for a Quick Tips Tuesday episode of the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast. I am your host, Coach Christine, and this is episode #60  of my podcast.  

Since this is only my second Quick Tips episode, I would like to remind you that that some of my team members are podcasting pros while others have never done anything like this before, so I encourage you to cheer them on as they learn this new medium and step out of their comfort zone. All of the Quick Tips Team members and their contact information may be found on my website YourEmptyNestCoach.com – look for the Quick Tips Team button on the home page. 

[Music: Back to Christine]

Why a quick tips episode? I’m asked all the time, “Christine, what is a quick tip that you can give to others.” Now, while I have worked out my go-to response, I’ve created this podcast as a resource to help you discover who you are meant to be through taking control of your thoughts and gaining confidence that you are strong enough to feel an emotion. AAAAND, there is nothing “quick” about that. So while you’ll continue to receive my coaching tips on Fridays, I thought I’d bring in some experts to provide some fantastic “quick tips” to keep you going while you are in the simmer. This is my gift to you and I hope you enjoy the combo, my empty nest friend. 

[Music: Sponsor Music] 

This Quick Tips episode is sponsored by my community: the Green Popsicle Sticks. Ready to find the GPS of your life?  Then sign up for my Thursday Thoughts about email where you will gain immediate access to the GPS Life Principles document, and will receive a link to join our community – and it is all FREE! See the link in this episode’s show notes, or head to my website YourEmptyNestCoach.com and click the Thursday Thoughts About button to get started. See you there! 

01:59

In this episode, I have the privilege of introducing you to five amazing ladies. First up is Deirdre!  As a minimalist at heart, I’m thrilled to have Deirdre on the the team. 

[Music: Guest Intro]

02:10

Deirdre:

Hi! I’m Deirdre from Declutter by Deirdre, a senior move management company. We’re creating a movement of happier people experiencing a full and decluttered life. I’m also the host of the Magnificent Aging podcast where I uncover ways to navigate through the aging process with grace and courage. And, we provide a repository for the exchange of helpful ideas and information by a guest experts to help us better understand our magnificent aging process. My tip for this month is to not store away those broken or boring holiday decorative items that you are keeping out of a sense of obligation. 

Pass them along to family members or donate them! Save yourself from next year’s frustration and guilt by getting rid of those items this year. Thanks for listening. I appreciate you. 

[Music: Back to Christine]

Thanks, Deirdre. My wonderful listener – isn’t she perfect for any aspiring minimalist? 

Next up we have Jenn Musselman, who yes, you heard in our last episode. She was kind enough to send us two tips this month! 

[Music: Guest Intro]

03:31

Name: Jenn

Hi, this is Jenn again, your closet/ wardrobe coach. 

Truth be told, I don’t care that much about fashion. What I do, however, care about is style. You might say, “Well, what’s the difference?” 

Fashion is what the designers put out there each and every season. 

And style is what we choose to pick from the fashion that is available that will be best for our body type. 

Some winter fashion that is out there now which you might be able to choose to work for you:

Leather: some sort of leather skirt, long pants, longer skirts

White Boots

Anything with animal print: cheetah print, leopard – maybe you’ll choose a belt or a cute pair of leopard print loafers

These are just some tips. 

Choose what fits your body type and make a great impression. 

[Music: Back to Christine]

Thanks, Jenn! She reminded me that I need to buy a belt – maybe I’ll get an animal print belt. What do you think? 

04:36

Next up is Jo Davies, our Humorous Observations expert. You’ll find her often where I found her on Instagram – her account is Midlife Highway – she’s here to give us a smile, and remind us that life doesn’t need to be so serious. 

[Music: Guest Intro]

Jo: 

Hi, I’m Jo, and my observation today is about patience, or in my case, a total lack of it. 

I tend to live my life resembling a pinball: bouncing around all over the place at breakneck speed. 

So I find it deeply frustrating when I’m out and about and people are ambling along window shopping and then just stop in the middle of the pavement. I mean, what’s that all about? 

Or people who drive at five miles an hour in the middle of the road looking for a car parking space. This happened to me the other day when I was in my new car which I hadn’t fully got used to, so I gave them a sharp blast on my windscreen wipers. 

Why do people stand in the queue at starbucks and wait until they get to the front of the queue before they finally decide that they want a cinnamon latte with gingerbread frosting or a Bailey’s frappuccino with extra cream? Okay, so that doesn’t actually exist, but it definitely should. 

While I’m on the subject of Starbucks, why do they have three people taking orders and only one person making the coffee? 

My mother always said, your patience isn’t tested, your given opportunities to learn patience. Well, I’ve had plenty, and it doesn’t seem to be working. But, never mind, just one of life’s challenges. All I say to myself everyday is, “Chin up, Chest out,  Onwards.” 

[Music: Back to Christine]

And look at all of those beautiful opportunities Jo just gave us to work on presence. It is fun to giggle at circumstances for sure. That Bailey’s frappuccino does sound good, doesn’t it? 

Monica Matthews is up next. I had the pleasure of meeting Monica when we both were on the Scholarship Shark podcast, together. She’s full of fantastic information about college scholarships. I’m honored she joined the team! 

[Music: Guest Intro]

06:28

Monica: 

Hi, this is Monica Matthews, also known as The Scholarship Mom. Today’s tip answers the question that I get from parents all the time and that is, “When do we start the college scholarship process?” 

The easy answer is, “as early as possible, “ but you might be thinking, “ah but my student is already a senior in high school, we’re too late.” 

It’s not too late, and my answer is, “start where you are.” 

Don’t worry about other parents. Don’t focus on what you haven’t done. Start where you are, right now. So, what exactly does this mean? 

It means that no matter how old your student is, you can help them win scholarships. 

Let me repeat that. 

No matter how old your student is, you can help them win scholarships. 

Your very first step is to know that you are not alone. I’ve been exactly where you are, and I know how overwhelming it is knowing that you NEED your student to win scholarship money, but you have no idea how to help and guide them. You feel the pressure and so does your student. Okay, so how do you help them? You do what I did when my son was college-bound and we had no money saved to help him pay for college. 

Oh my gosh, I will never forget that feeling. It was the summer before his senior year in high school, and he was all excited and started telling me about the colleges he was going to apply to, and how much they cost. 

Ack! 

I, honestly, had no idea what the cost of college was like. It had been almost 20 years since I had graduated from college. Holy Smokes! Times had definitely changed. So, please don’t panic and lose hope. Scholarships are free money and I can help you help your own student win them. In my next tip, I’m going to share how you can partner with your student in the scholarship process, and learn how they can apply using my SMART: S-M-A-R-T technique. I have a ton of information, and I’m really excited to share it all with you. Thanks for listening! 

[Music: Back to Christine]

I don’t know about you but I certainly can identify with Monica when her son was looking at colleges. We lost a few years in the process too, so we were not ready AT ALL. 

Okay, my friend, next up is our Quick Tips team Beauty Muse, the fabulous, Susan Stevens – this woman is a gift to women, as you will hear. 

[Music: Guest Intro]

8:31

Susan: 

Susan Stevens, licensed cosmetologist for 25 years; salon owner for six. 

Your reflection. 

Your reflection in the mirror is so important. How do you perceive yourself? Do you see your beauty? Your beauty is always there. What you see, is what others will perceive from you. Find a stylist that brings out your best, ‘cause you are beautiful, and if you believe that every day, you will be surprised at what you can handle, and what you can do. 

[Music: Back to Christine]

See what I mean? My friend, you ARE beautiful. The next time you look in the mirror, I want you to say that five times, “I am beautiful.” Heck, say it every time you look in the mirror! 

9:27

And from me, today, I have another tip for you for when your emotions are running high, and how to get back on track when you are in the midst of interacting with others. 

[Music: Guest Intro]

Try the GPS emotional reset exercise:

For each letter (GPS), we’ll take a deep breath in and out with a focused purpose.

Your first breath, G, is for the gift of time: 

As you breathe in slowly, imagine gifting yourself with time. Time to feel the emotion in your body – How does it feel?  Do you like it? Where is the feeling sitting? 

As you slowly breathe out – gift yourself with time to notice your thoughts. 

Where are your thoughts? Do you like them? Are they valid? 

Your second breath, P, is for Presence: 

Breathing in, I’d like you to focus on your breath entering your body and where it is headed. If it wants to stop as a shallow breath, try to extend it an extra second or two and notice where it lands. 

Attempt to hold it for a couple of seconds. 

Then, as you breathe out, I’d like you to focus on the NOW. 

Be present with your child. Do this by: 

Using the slow breathe out to notice a detail you didn’t see a few moments ago about your child. 

What are they wearing? Is there a tear in their eyes? Are they put-together or disheveled? Where are their eyes focused? 

Your final breath, S, is for Speaking:

This is your chance to model good emotional health to your child and to share it with them verbally.

As you breathe in and out slowly, I’d like you to use the time to form words to share with your child: words that share where you are, and your desire for more time. 

If anger is what you are experiencing, try something along the lines of, “I hear you. My emotions are automatically going to angry about this, BUT that isn’t the emotion I’d like to have at this moment. I love you. I want to get to a different emotion. While I allow the anger pass are you able to share more with me?” 

This final focused breath (and request) gifts your child with time and space to share additional concerns and thoughts with you. You may also find that they take ownership of it more than they would have if you had jumped in with your first emotion. 

And at this point, your job is to listen and notice your thoughts.

The most important thing you can do, right now, is to listen with love.

 Listen with love.

 Listen with love. 

Repeat the GPS Emotional Reset exercise as much as needed, and use what works for you.

[Music: Back to Christine]

12:31

And with that we wrap up our first month of Your Empty Nest Coach Quick Tips team episodes. If you enjoyed this episode, take a moment to subscribe to this podcast – it is FREE! 

My next episode is titled “Be the Amazing Boss of Your Thoughts.” Curious? I hope so! If you are subscribed to my podcast, you’ll find it in your feed on Friday by 6 AM. I invite you to take a listen. 

If you aren’t driving and are able to do a screenshot of this episode and share it on social media to help others to find it, that would be super helpful to me and the team. Tag me @emptynestcoach so that I may thank you. OR if you can think of one other person who would enjoy this podcast, please, don’t keep it a secret.

[GPS Exec Thank you music]

13: 15

Thanks! Thank you! A huge shout out to my GPS Execs: the executive producers of my podcast! Visit my website or see my show notes for a link to learn how you may become a GPS Exec, where you will gain bonus access to me – and more!

Before you go, please, please, please remember that YOU ARE AMAZING!

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