149: I’m Feeling Lost and Don’t Know What To Do Next: Yielding in Life 💚

149: I'm Feeling Lost and Don't Know What To Do Next: Yielding in Life 💚

Hello, my amazing friend!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Yes, my empty nest friend, yielding in your life happens more often than we think. Being comfortable, (and) loving yourself in the yield moments will allow you to move forward in a way that serves you and the world at large in a positive way."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

@emptynestcoach 's podcast episode: I'm Feeling Lost and Don't Know What To Do Next: Yielding in Life  #whatisnext #yielding #lifelesson

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Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers

  • 00:42 Christine, I'm Feeling a Bit Lost and I Don't Know What To Do
  • 06:20 Where's Coach Christine: SupaPass, Socials & Feedspot Blog
  • 08:08 Bloopers

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The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 149

FULL TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00

Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #149.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve used in prior episodes - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian. You’ll do this by leveling-up 

[level-up music]

your life in small increments - those small wins add up to big changes.

I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode today. Here we go…

[short intro music]

00:00:42

[computer game level up music (short)] 

Ask Coach Christine

I get the following question often and asked in many ways: “Christine, I’m feeling a bit lost and I don’t know what’s next.”

My response? 

No matter your age, or your place in life, this happens. The first thing to know is that it’s normal. We have moments, sometimes weeks, months, or years where we aren’t sure of our direction. 

Gifting yourself with knowing it’s normal is key. When you feel like you shouldn’t be lost or confused or that you should have clarity. You are resisting what is. You are already confused or lost - telling yourself you aren't isn’t going to magically change things. You are there, and it’s okay. 

Remind yourself of this. Remind yourself that you won’t stay there forever and that it is fine to give yourself time to figure it out. You don’t have to figure your entire life out tomorrow. Life changes. People change, majors change, colleges change, relationships change, circumstance(s) change that change a human’s life journey. You change. You learn things about yourself that make you question who you have been and who you will be. It is all good. This is growth. Change happens, it is good and it can even be healthy in most circumstances.  

00:02:09

You’re wondering though, what you should do. If you need help with this, I do work on uncovering thought-deliveries that don’t serve you, and we do that in private coaching. While I remind you that you are perfectly where you need to be to move forward in your life, you learn tools that help you clear your mind to discover who you are. We also work on living in the now so that you may begin to consciously consider your future, and when you get to the point where you are ready to really figure out what is next, I encourage you to dream and to try things. 

Should coaching not be an option for you, for whatever reason, all of these things you’ll find throughout my podcast episodes. 

When you get to the point where you are ready to try things, my friend, then I encourage you to try things boldly and bravely. You might have a ton of ideas on what could be next for your life. You don’t have to make your choice final for the rest of your life.You could try it for a bit - or for a season of your life. You could ask those who already do it what it is like, ask them what they love about it, ask them what they hate about it - you could dive deep into the research online, you could shadow people who do it, and, of course, you can also jump in and try it. 

My friend, it is really easy to believe something will be the perfect answer to what will be your life’s purpose or even what will make you happy for a small amount of time. But let’s be real, thinking about something and actually doing it are two totally different things - when you do jump in, reality sits in and you might possibly discover that it isn’t quite the perfection your mind had dreamt up. Want to be an author? Talk to authors about what they really do. Want to be in film and television in some capacity but not willing to work odd hours… it might not be a fit for you, or you might have to look for a specific angle to find what fits for you.

Now, of course, you may have been right on the money and they could be absolute perfection - totally what you’re meant to do, but if you have an opportunity to explore and try them out before you dive in head-first - I encourage you to do that. 

Of course, the opposite of this is that you dive-in head-first to a lot of things and see what you love in the end. See what rises to the top as you sit in the simmer of your life, and yes, I have an episode about that. 

My beautiful friend, not knowing what is ahead is completely normal. Getting comfortable with this will serve you well in your years to come. As I was gathering my thoughts on this, the image of a yield sign kept popping into my mind - it could be that I’m teaching my daughter how to drive, but what if we see these moments (going forward) as yield signs. I’m also now wondering if I already talked about this in a prior episode. This is what happens when you do so many episodes. [giggle] 

00:05:00

Well, either way, these yield signs will pop in, in different areas: with family members, in your hobby or career choices, in friendships, in medical needs for you and others, just as they do as your drive somewhere. Some you completely expect and others, as you journey to somewhere new, may surprise you. 

Sometimes, we barely need to yield at all at these signs and other times, we sit at that yield sign for what seems forever. We eventually get to move on but who you are as you yield will be what makes the difference. 

Who do you want to be as you yield? Filled with road rage or peacefully enjoying your music, looking at the traffic, and maybe when you see you aren’t going anywhere for a while, trying a new music choice?

Yes, my empty nest friend, yielding in your life happens more often than we think. Being comfortable, loving yourself in the yield moments will allow you to move forward in a way that serves you and the world at large in a positive way. 

And the next time you come to a yield sign you can think of this and ask yourself two things:

Who do I want to be right now as I yield?

And

What do I want to try? 

You are perfectly where you need to be, my friend. I’ll say it again -  you should gift yourself time to discover what is next, and try things.

I’m cheering you on! 

00:06:20

[quirky music under segment]

Christine? Christine? Christine, where are you? 

For the next few months, I’m going to be primarily working on our community setup in SupaPass, so if you haven’t already reached out to me, to be notified when it is ready to go, be sure to do that soon! Look for the community section on my website (YourEmptyNestCoach.com) or email me at christine @ youremptynestcoach.com and say - tell me about your community! 

You’ll also find me testing out things on the socials- typically in order of most active to least active you’ll find me on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest, Linkedin and Twitter. The last four I haven’t been doing much - outside of periodically remembering they exist and maybe then posting but we’ll see if that changes this summer. If you use one of these outlets often and want to connect on them or collaborate with something, reach out and let me know! 

I very well may be visiting more places online as well such as podcasts as I’ll have a bit more time - I do know I’ll be on the More Than A Mother podcast, as I just booked my interview time. The best way to find where I am is to visit my media and press page! You’ll find all the things there. 

Finally, I was surprised to find that Feedspot Blog added me as one of the Top 25 Empty Nest podcasts on the web. That was super fun to wake up to. I’m in amazing company on this list with those who have been around for quite a bit longer than I have been. Super honored to top off the list in the number one spot. Thanks Feedspot Blog!

I’ll be back in a few days to wish you an amazing summer and to share why I am taking a summer break from podcasting. 

My beautiful friend, you are amazing!

Talk soon!

[end music]

00:08:08

[blooper]

[end music]

[end]


113: When Something Unexpected Comes Along: Pots on the Stove 🍳

113: When Something Unexpected Comes Along: Pots on the Stove 🍳

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

Some years the unexpected is more the norm than the norm (whatever that means). The unexpected has a way of leveling us up, stretching us, and making us stronger. When we focus on a specific project or route for our lives, the unexpected may cause gut reactions such as, 

  • "Why have I been working on this project the whole time?" or
  • "My work must have moved out of my zone of genius."

Or the dreaded:

  • "Wow, I've been on the wrong path this whole time!"

Sure, that could be the case, but when we zoom out to the bigger picture of our life, it might only be time to move that project to the warming oven for a bit until other things have matured. You'll never go wrong if you consider both before making a big decision.

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Try different things, and know that some “recipes in the pots' are going to cook up a lot quicker than you were expecting."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙Unexpected opportunities? Does it mean you are off your life's course? Coach Christine discusses in this #Podcast episode #EmptyNest  #Podcast #WomenEmpoweringWomen  #Opportunities #Challenges💚

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💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • An Analogy to Consider When Unexpected Opportunities Enter Your Life
  • To Remember to Discern What You Are Making it All Mean
  • To Remember that What You Are Making it Mean is Optional

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. How many pots do you have on your stove?
  2. Is this analogy useful?

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

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FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 113 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast


00:00:00

Christine:  Hi, it’s coach Christine.  This is my podcast, it is the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast.  Today I discuss When Something Unexpected Comes Along and it’s episode number 113.  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

Hello, my future empty nest friend and CEO of your life, and CEO around here, that is short for Conscious Effective Olympian of Your Life!  You know all of that simmering I have talked about in an early episode and within many episodes since then?  Today, let’s consider that our life may have more than one pot on the stove.

00:01:10

Before we head into our imaginary kitchen, I am about to open up a few spots for one-on-one VIP intensive coaching.  This is for those of you who can set aside two and a half hours with me.  You’ll have my full attention.  We’ll walk through your current situation, all of the tools and resources available in the Flock, how to best use them.  We’ll even create a custom path just for you.  To get on my list, message me on Instagram or send me an email at Christine@youremptynestcoach.com.  I can’t wait to work with you!

00:01:44

Of course, I need to remind you that I have full show notes with links to anything I discuss in the episode, and a full episode transcription on my website.  Those reside at YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P (for podcast) and 113 (for this episode’s number).  (YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P113).

00:02:02

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

00:02:49

[Boiling sound]  

In an earlier episode, episode number 29, I talk about looking at life as a simmer.  While we learn and grow, it is the time needed to become who we are meant to be, and rushing to a boil is a ton of energy that may put our lives in a state of frenzy. I say a bunch more about ingredients, recipes and such, and I’ll have a link in my show notes, of course, but what if we do that zoom up and out thing?  You know, like we can do on Google earth, where we take the focus off that one pot and now begin to see not only the stove, but the entire kitchen.

00:03:25

Let's imagine that on the stove, we see that there isn’t just one pot but actually two or three, all at different states of readiness. One pot may be for tomorrow’s lunch, prep work. The two others may be for dinner.  You know how it is, you have a well-loved and always utilized kitchen.  There is always something either just about to start or being cleaned up, or at least it feels that way!  

00:03:49

The fun part about using our imagination is that we can make the stove of ours big enough for six burners, or twelve or twenty!  This is your life analogy so as I progress, adjust accordingly.  You may have as many burners on the stove, or as many stoves as you like.  You also may use the pot to represent whatever you want.  Where, in my earlier episode I referenced a pot simmering as our life, but what if a pot was one area of your life?  You could have your career in one pot, or career options in several pots.  You could have family in one pot.  Things you are learning, you could have all in one pot or each thing you are learning is in its own pot.  You might have nine pots for your business alone, if you have your own business. 

00:04:37

The idea is that I want you to have this imagery, this analogy, for you to use as it suits you.  Let’s say for a moment that you are working on a big project for your career.  You decide to have a stove labeled career options, and you aren’t sure which one to pursue.

00:04:53

Let me pause for a moment, you know I always will ask you if your thought-deliveries are well sorted, and if you have a good gauge on who your future self is, and are you checking in with them often?  Assuming those are true, then try different things, and know that some “recipes in the pots” are going to cook up a lot quicker than you were expecting.  It isn’t until you taste it that you’ll know it is right for you, or maybe it smells super bad and oh, you know that isn’t going to work. So you either tear up that recipe, or you try it again and over time, perfect it to you and your family’s taste buds. 

00:05:33

While you are tossing a bad one down the drain, or maybe feeding it to your dog, (well, it wasn’t that bad after all) one of your other recipes finishes and it looks delicious, perfect but it wasn’t one you expected to be ready. You were really focused on another one. So much so, that you aren’t sure if this new one is worth trying right now.  Why not?  What do you have to lose?  Try it out, see what you think.  After all, that other meal on a burner might take a whole lot longer than you were expecting, and it may not be all you expected it to be, after all.  You know how recipes can be.

00:06:13

It also doesn’t mean that all of the other meals that are in prep mode, or simmering, that they just get thrown away.  All it means is that this one is ready now.  Imagine if you threw away everything else in the kitchen because this one meal was ready?  Seems a bit odd when we think of it that way, doesn’t it?  What if also, you imagine that the higher power in your life, should you have one, is like the head chef in the kitchen.  I tend to use the term Universe here, so anyone may plug in who their higher power is. But imagine that they aren’t telling you A, what you are making, and B, when your recipes will be ready.  [Ding] 

00:06:54

So they set the timer and the ding goes off with the chef stating, “pot A is done.”  Meanwhile, you were darn sure that pot C was the next thing you were about to serve.  So, of course, adjustments in your thought-deliveries need to be made.  You could spend your time yelling at the chef, complaining that you were ready to serve pot C and that needs a soup bowl, but pot A needs a plate, and you weren’t ready for that.  Or you could lean into the change, switch burners, grab the plates and get going.

00:07:25

Sometimes we do this in our life. We think we have a plan, we are focused on one thing, something else, another opportunity, pops up, and we decide that what we were working on is a complete waste.  We’re going to stop considering it at all and ever again, because this other thing showed itself to us first.  But what if instead of throwing all of that work away, you simply move it to a back burner, put it in a warming oven.  Oh, this imaginary kitchen has three.  Why not?   And you’ll have that other “pot” when you are ready to go back to it, should that happen. Then, there are those quick fry meals.  You know the ones you get for those days where you are busy juggling more than you should be and you toss something in the pan with a meal in minutes.  Those are exactly what you need some days, aren’t they? Or maybe most days for you.  Hey, it’s all good.  They serve their purpose and in life, sometimes we need little escapes (those quick meals) to gain perspective, until we have time to focus on our next project.  The way we escape doesn’t need to become our way of life.  It’s a quick fix, kind of like the top of our life’s toolbox.

00:08:43

What could this be for you in this analogy?  Maybe it’s a hobby that you need to take that allows your brain to think differently for a short time.  Now, I’m not going to tell you how exactly to use this analogy.  I trust you and your future-self.  Your GPS can figure that out.   As always, if you would like to see what materializes in your kitchen-of-life, sometimes the best meals are the ones that aren’t planned and are off the recipe.  You won’t know until you try them.  To dig into more detail with any of this, if you need accountability, or want me to cheer you on, all of this is included in my GPS Support Flock, of course.

[Music]

00:09:21

The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, how many pots do you have on your stove?  And two, is this analogy useful?  All right, friend, check your thought-deliveries, train your Protector, become CEO, the Conscious Effective Olympian of your life, and always remember that you are amazing!  See ya!

[Bloopers]

00:10:23

Still listening? 

It is no shock that my last episode’s still listening section was talking about things I have simmering and then I was led to this episode.  I love when that happens. I’m a multi-passionate person, so in my kitchen, there are at least four or five stoves and most have something cooking on them at any point in time. It is where I am most happy.  Are you like that?

[Music]

[End]

54: Fan Favorite: Beef Stew: Enjoying the Simmer

54: Fan Favorite. Beef Stew: Enjoying the Simmer

(Christine, What Should I do With My Time? )

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend!
 
This episode is the third of four recap episodes for this calendar year.

I’m sharing episodes that have resonated with you (my amazing listener) along with listener responses. This recap is of episode #29 where I answered the question, “Christine, what should I do with my time?” It is also the episode where the concept of simmering first appeared: so much fun! 

Take a listen or read the full transcript below.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓ , so you don’t miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓
 
Want to subscribe to this podcast? Great news – it is free!
> Click here, and then choose your favorite podcast app – be sure to hit subscribe or follow, once you choose your favorite!
Let me know if you have any additional questions – as I am always happy to explain how podcasts work!

This Episode is Brought To You By

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

    • How the “simmering” has resonated with my listeners
    • The advantage of a good “simmer” in life
    • Why forcing things to fill your time isn’t always the best answer

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Have you been using the simmering analogy in your life? 
  2. What are you simmering about? 

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources


Full Transcript

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.

46: How do you know when it is time to stop simmering?

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend!
 
A question I have been asked lately by listeners and clients is, “Christine, how will I know when it is time to stop simmering?” This episode is my response. 
 
Take a listen or read the full transcript below. 
 
⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll all the way down ⇓ so you don’t miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓
 
Want to subscribe to this podcast? Great news – it is free!
> Click here, and then choose your favorite podcast app – be sure to hit subscribe or follow, once you choose your favorite!
Let me know if you have any additional questions – as I am always happy to explain how podcasts work!

This Episode is Brought To You By

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode

    • Who will know when your are done simmering
    • The importance of your motivating factors
    • Why the work in the simmer is so important

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. What thoughts come to your mind as you listen to this episode? 
  2. Do you have a particular simmer that you are working through right now? 

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources


Full Transcript

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.

Episode 36: Walking Through the Empty Nest Transition with Jo Davies

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend!
 
I am thrilled to bring this episode to you.
 
I enjoy scrolling through Instagram and making new connections on that platform. One account that always makes me smile is Midlife Highway, which is run by the ever so funny, Jo Davies. 
 
Jo has supremely fresh and funny posts and is highly engaged on the platform. She shared a few photos and Insta stories about her walk on the Camino de Santiago this year. The stories piqued my interest, and a few thoughts arrived in my head: I would like to know more about this walk, and I would like to know more about Jo. I bet some of her other followers would like to know more, too. I’m going to invite her to be a guest on my podcast.
 
I did.
 
And she said, “Yes!”
 
Not only that, she took the interview call while she was on holiday/vacation, and stayed up late! She’s got the amazing thing figured out! 
 
This conversation, along with my recent camping trip, simmered together to inspire me to create my GPS Reset Weekend: Unplugged and Charged Up retreats. A shout out to Jo for being a vital part of that recipe!
 
I hope you enjoy this interview as much as I enjoyed speaking with her.
 
Take a listen or read the full transcript below. 
 
⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll all the way down ⇓ so you don’t miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓
 
Want to subscribe to this podcast? Great news – it is free!
> Click here, and then choose your favorite podcast app – be sure to hit subscribe or follow, once you choose your favorite!
Let me know if you have any additional questions – as I am always happy to explain how podcasts work!

This Episode is Brought To You By

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode

    • An introduction to Jo Davies
    • What inspired Jo to walk the Camino de Santiago
    • The impact of the walk in her life and why she has made it an annual walk
    • Jo’s advice to future empty nesters
    • And more!

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Have you ever done a long walk such as the ones Jo has completed? 
  2. Would you ever consider doing a walk like this?

Where to Find Jo

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources


Full Transcript

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.