120: How to Avoid Empty Nest Syndrome

120: How to Avoid Empty Nest Syndrome

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend,

I have the quick answer and the long answer in this episode. 💚

Enjoy!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"You get to call this next chapter of your life whatever you want: An adventure, a creative process, or a discovery. And don't feel limited by what I come up with. What ideas do you have?"

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙The podcast episode in which I talk about the possibility of avoiding empty nest syndrome. 💚#EmptyNestSyndrome  #EmptyNest  #Podcast #EmptyNestMom #EmptyNestHelp

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This Episode is Brought To You By

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • What Coach Christine's Thoughts are on Avoiding Empty Nest Syndrome
  • New Words to Use for The Next Chapter in Your Life
  • My High-Level Thoughts on Moving Forward in These Years
  • What Support Options I Have For You

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Have you experienced empty nest syndrome? 
  2. Do you think it is avoidable?

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

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FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 120 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast


00:00:00

Christine: Hi, it’s Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it is the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast and this is episode 120.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve introduced in prior episodes.  Should you feel a bit lost, use my show notes for best places to begin.  In this episode, we are going to consider the statement “how to avoid empty nest syndrome.”  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:01:00

Hello, my future empty nest friend and Conscious Effective Olympian, or CEO of your life!  Wanting to avoid the empty nest syndrome?  What?  Okay, we’ll get started in a moment.  Show notes for this episode have links to anything I discuss that is linkable, and of course, you’ll find all sorts of fun stuff, and ways to work with me on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  If you enjoy this episode, I invite you to subscribe to this podcast, and to consider joining the GPS Support Flock.  What is that?  I’m so glad you asked; take a listen.

00:01:33

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

00:02:21

How to avoid empty nest syndrome.  All right, this is another topic that could be super quick and I could just say if you’ve been listening to me for a while, you already know that empty nest syndrome isn’t a clinical diagnosis, so you can simply call it something else and voilá, you are no longer are in empty nest syndrome.  I know, I know, it isn’t that easy.  Well, if you’ve cleared out your thoughts a ton, trained your Protector and are managing those thought-deliveries, it might not be as difficult as you think.  You do get to call this next chapter of your life whatever you want; an adventure, a creative process, a discovery. 

 

00:03:03

Don’t feel limited by what I come up with.  What ideas do you have?  In front of you, you have the opportunity to create your life’s next masterpiece.  I want you to be the superhero of your own life.  To be the CEO, the Conscious Effective Olympian of your life as you move forward.  So the short answer is we end there.  Call it something else, something that makes you feel good and that you believe and be done with it.

 

00:03:32

There’s a bit of a longer answer though and that’s to head back to episode number 3 of my podcast and do some listening.  The high-level of that, I will encourage you to learn to be present in your life, to begin to notice the thoughts that enter your mind, to notice your emotions and to begin to lean into them rather than to run away from them.  Or you can ignore them, shove them down deep somewhere and they’ll wait to pop up when you least expect it.  I’ll introduce you to the idea that you have a Protector of your mind (some call this concept Ego), and I’ll challenge you to stop letting them run the show of your life.  For you to train them, so that they serve you well rather than boss you around. 

 

00:04:11

This is your time to claim you.  This is your time to claim who you are moving forward.  How do you avoid empty nest syndrome? 

If you googled this topic and you’ve come across this podcast episode, you’re probably either already in it or you’re feeling like you’re headed that way, so you have the opportunity now to get a head start.  Consider what you call it.  Realize that those thoughts that you have are optional and if, when you say, “I have empty nest syndrome,” and you notice that it makes you feel lousy, then let’s let’s get a piece of paper out, let’s write down what you think.  Let’s think about different ways to call this stage of your life, so that you feel good about it.

 

00:04:51

I could give you 50 different ways, but I might not necessarily give you the one that resonates with you.  This is your journey, and you’ll have to do some work.  I encourage you early to rely on yourself a bit more than me.  I guide you to finding her because in the end, you know yourself better than anyone.  Of course, I am here as a resource.  You may listen to my podcast episodes, if this is resonating with you.  If you need a bit more support and want some guided resources, consider joining the GPS support flock.

 

00:05:23 

To recap, your experience is your experience.  Your thoughts that you have in your mind have a lot to do with your experience.  Your prior experiences impact your thoughts, and if you are never in tune with noticing your thoughts, you may sit in empty nest syndrome for a really long time, or another stage of your life for longer than you need to.  Do you wanna avoid it?  I don’t know about you, but looking back, it’s been an incredible gift for me, noticing that I was entering it, processing through it, and doing the work to become who I see in the future.  I want that for you. 

 

00:06:01

You’ve taken the first step; noticing you are in this stage of your life, or headed towards it.  Your next step is to figure out how to enjoy the journey through the transition.  When you avoid things, you miss out on experiences; experiences that are lovely, experiences that may be painful, but ultimately, experiences that allow you grow into who you are meant to be.  I know amazing things are in store for you, so I say, dive in, get to work, enjoy the journey and be more than you ever thought you could. 

[Music]

00:06:36

The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, have you experienced empty nest syndrome?  Two, do you think it’s avoidable?  As always, I provide content to make you think, my empty nest friend.  My hope is that I am able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life.  My next episode’s title is: A Motherhood Memory Book & The Rest of 2020.  Don’t forget to subscribe to this podcast if you like it.  It’s free after all.  And always, always, always, always remember that you are amazing!

[Bloopers]

00:07:45

Still listening?  I’m recording this in October, and realizing that when this episode comes out, actually, and the last one, our new president should have been elected.  Well, it’s 2020, maybe something’s up in the air.  Who knows?  Either way, no matter where we end up, and which way you voted, know that it is okay to feel excited, disappointed, scared, angry.  Notice those emotions.  Check your thoughts.  Ask if they are true and work on your presence.  What can you do in this moment, this moment right now, right here, to change it?  If the answer is nothing, be present and be the best you in your life’s circle of influence.  There is more power in that than you may ever know. 

[Music]

[End]

119: Let’s Talk About Divorce in the Empty Nest: Does the Empty Nest Cause Divorce?

119: Let's Talk About Divorce in the Empty Nest: Does the Empty Nest Cause Divorce?

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend,

This topic seems to be either a big part of your life or is a taboo topic in what I've witnessed. I haven't run into many humans in my age range that comfortably discuss divorce - except for a fab podcaster I mention in this episode. Even when a divorce doesn't personally impact someone, the discomfort is almost always visible when divorce is mentioned in a conversation. 

Somehow, this is surprising in 2020, despite the level of surprises in 2020.

Divorce is a word. We choose how much power we allow the WORD to have in our life. If you are in the process of a divorce, outside of the financial and legal implications (I can't speak to those), you do have the opportunity to move forward in a way that will serve you well - or not. 

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Life is a beautiful mess. Make it YOUR beautiful mess and create a masterpiece going forward. You get to decide who you’ll be. Don’t think for a moment that you are defined by divorce. You are more than divorce. You are amazing you, who happened to have experienced a divorce."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙The podcast episode in which I talk about the "d" word - divorce 💚 #GrayDivorce #GreyDivorce #EmptyNestDivorce #EmptyNest  #Podcast #EmptyNestMom #EmptyNestSyndrome 

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This Episode is Brought To You By

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • To Consider Love in a Divorce
  • To Remember to Choose Thoughts that Provide You with A Positive Energy in Your Life
  • Acceptance Allows You To Move Forward

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Have you ever considered divorce?
  2. What do you make divorce mean for yourself or others?

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

Subscribe To This Podcast

It is FREE!

Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 119 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

Christine:  Hi, it’s Coach Christine.  This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast and this is episode number 119.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve introduced in prior episodes.  Should you feel a bit lost, use my show notes for best places to begin.  In this episode, Let's Talk About Divorce in the Empty Nest: Does the Empty Nest Cause Divorce?

00:00:28

I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:01:01

Hello, my future empty nest friend and Conscious Effective Olympian, or CEO, of your life!  Are you feeling like the superhero of your life yet?  I sure hope so.  No one should feel like anything other than the leading character of your own life, and why not be a superhero?  Show notes for this episode have links to anything I discuss that is linkable, and of course, you’ll find all sorts of fun stuff, and ways to work with me on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  If you enjoy this episode, I invite you to subscribe to this podcast, and to consider joining the GPS Support Flock.  What is that?  I’m so glad you asked; take a listen.

00:01:44

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon!   

00:02:29

I had an earlier episode about does the empty nest cause anxiety and the concept is similar to this.  The empty nest gifts us with new opportunities to look at parts of our life that we may have easily been ignoring, or too busy to notice.  I can’t imagine it’s often the actual event of entering the empty nest is what causes a divorce.  What happens is the empty nest shines a light on things that are already there, uncovers them in a way.  A divorce that happens after a long-term marriage, 20 or more years, has garnered the name gray divorce.  You know me, I like to do an internet search to find what comes up and you know what I found? 

00:03:17 

Financial Planners and Divorce Attorneys have claimed many of the top spots, so when you search things online be sure to check who has authored the articles.  The other topic that, interestingly enough, earned more than five spots of the search results were articles about Jennifer Grey divorcing Clark Gregg after 19 years of marriage.  Now my guess is Jennifer’s last name of Grey plays into that, with it also being a gray marriage.  But still is this what people find first when they begin to look for help in this area?  Wow.

00:03:44

I spent a solid 20 minutes laughing over the images I found on one site.  Their idea of what 50 years and older looks like was clearly more like 85 or 90 years old.  I mean, I’m 49.  Is this what you think 50- or 60-, or even 70-year old looks like?  Please, rethink this.  Maybe it needs to have a different name.  I’m sure there are people who have been married 20 years, getting a divorce, that are younger than 50.  What about mature divorce?  What do you think?  Well, I’m kind of straying here.  Let’s get back to our topic.

00:04:17

I did find a paper at Bowling Green State University.  In it, it states, “... the divorce rate for couples aged 50 and older has doubled since 1990, and it has more than doubled for married individuals aged 65 and older.  An older college graduate, even one in a first marriage, faces essentially the same risk of divorce as the older high school graduate.  And, Brown and Lin, authors, point out, more than 55 percent of gray divorces involve couples who were married for more than 20 years.”  I share this with you not to freak you out, if you are married, but let’s be real, it’s something that happens to marriages, and if it may happen to you, if it is happening to you, I want you to know that you aren’t alone.

00:05:03

If you get to the empty nest and begin to consider divorce, whether you’re considering it, whether your partner is considering it, or you’re both considering it, if you are the CEO of your life, the Conscious Effective Olympian, you’ll be able to sort through your thought-deliveries out enough to look at your partner and know that you want to love them for who they are.   That’s your job, nothing else.  Their job is not to make you happy.  I mean, it’s painful to think about, but if you want them to be happy, and they want a divorce, you want them to do what will make them happy.  Let’s jump for a moment and imagine that you had always planned for your child to go to a local college, or to live 30 minutes from you, and one day they announce that they are moving 400 miles away for the perfect opportunity, whether it’s college or work.  Of course, there is a level of heart-brokenness because you weren’t expecting this, but when you see it makes sense for them, you get on board, even if it’s reluctantly at first.  Why?  Because you love them and you know this is the right thing for them.  

00:06:09

Okay, now, imagine your partner, who you love dearly, announces they aren’t happy.  That they want a divorce and they give you their reasons why.  I would imagine you’d be heart-broken, but their reasons are their reasons.  You can make them mean whatever you want to.  They may choose statements that blame you.  You have the option to accept those in your mind or not.  They may simply say they aren’t happy and don’t want to try anymore.  If they don’t want to try, do you want to force you both to be in this relationship?

00:06:42

Things to think about.  And since I don’t know your particular circumstances, I’ll leave it there, but be careful that you are cognizant of the thought-deliveries that you allow in your mind going forward.  Make sure that once you process through your emotions, that you choose thought-deliveries that put you in a positive energy moving forward in your life.  I also want to remind you that it is important, if the divorce is happening or has happened, to accept it.  When you resist what is, you never get to move forward.  When you resist it, you continue to force yourself into reliving the divorce feelings over and over and over.  I’d much rather see you accept it, spend time mourning the loss, go through the anger, figuring out how to navigate this with your children, because I don’t care how old they are, they will be impacted, and move forward.  This is your life.  What do you want your story to be as you move forward?

00:07:42

Please also gift yourself with grace and an abundance of patience, because if you are in the midst of an empty nest transition and a divorce, you have two losses at once.  It is a lot.  Know you are strong enough to handle it, but you have to gift yourself with grace and time to process it all.  You have options, you always do.  You can blame your ex.  How does that make you feel?  You are the person you get to be moving forward, so get to know yourself.  Let’s figure out who you are in the future and look to them for guidance.  More than likely they’ll put the way you are feeling in this moment in perspective, and remind you that you are worth being with someone who wants to be married to you, or remind you that if you are the one who made the decision, that you get to live the life you want. 

00:08:37

The better you get to know yourself now through this journey, the better your years ahead will be.  Honor your true self.  Find out who you are outside of the marriage.  This is all information I would share with anyone, whether it’s divorce, or whether it’s loss of a child or a parent, there are no guarantees in life.  There’s no guarantee I’m going to wake up tomorrow morning.  There’s no guarantee that my house is still going to be standing 10 years from now.  There’s no guarantee that my husband and I will both have our jobs in two weeks.  There’s no guarantee that we’re going to be married till our dying days, or one of our dying days.  There’s no guarantee that we won’t be homeless in our future.  There’s no guarantee that we will stay healthy for the next 10, 20, 30, 40 years.

00:09:25

My beautiful friend, there are things we cannot control and when you get to a point where you are able to accept the lousy things, painful things, as well as the amazing things, this is where you start to become the Conscious Effective Olympian, the CEO of your life.  Life is a beautiful mess. Make it your beautiful mess and create a masterpiece going forward.  You get to decide who you’ll be.  Don’t think for a moment that you are defined by divorce.  You are more than being divorced.  You are amazing you, you happened to have experienced a divorce.  Sure, people may treat you differently.  That’s about them, not you. And you’ll figure out who your real circle is.  It could be devastating or a beautiful gift.  The thought about it is up to you. 

00:10:20

In the end, this is all CEO of your life stuff.  It will allow you to have power in your life moving forward.  I want you to be the CEO of your life.  As I said before, be the superhero of your own life.  Write your own story that is freaking amazing, divorce or no divorce, you’ve got this my friend.  All this being said, I hope it helps.  But to be transparent, I am not divorced, as I discussed, you know, there’s no guarantees.  But I want to share with you a resource, the Doing Divorce Right podcast with Jennifer Hurvits.  If you have the “D” word in your vocabulary, definitely check it out.  You can download her episodes wherever you listen to podcasts.  You can find her on instagram @doingdivorceright.  She always makes me laugh there.  Yes, I follow her and I’m married.  Gasp!  Jennifer also has a Facebook group, offers a free 30-minute coaching consultant call and so much more.  Head to her website for all the details, and of course, you’ll find links in my shownotes.  I would love for you to check out her resources, and definitely, let her know I sent you.  I’m always here to help you no matter the situation, empty nester or not, divorce or not.  I truly believe that diversity in experiences and perspectives makes us stronger.  So please don’t ever think for a moment that because I’m not divorced, you wouldn’t be welcome in my online spaces, or because I have one child and you have five, that we’ll never understand each other.  Maybe not right away, but we’ll make each other stronger, I guarantee it.

00:11:56

I also want to leave you with this.  I feel like someone needs to hear this.  If you’re in a place where you weren’t the one who wanted the divorce, I want you to know that there are married women who wish they were.  They want the freedom. They’ve told me.  So, divorced or married, the grass is always greener on the other side.  Your thoughts about the grass that you have has more to do with your life than the actual grass.  Take your power back by accepting and moving forward.  Let's show this world what you are made of.  Divorce is a word, let’s not give it a power to control your life.  It doesn’t need to mean failure, it can mean a new beginning.  You get to choose.

00:12:38

I couldn’t possibly address legal, financial and other impacts of your life in a divorce in this episode, so I think starting with Jennifer’s podcast will be a great start and branch out from there.  If you find other resources that are worth sharing with others, please let me know.  Divorced or not, you are always welcome in the GPS Support FLock. 

00:12:59

The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, have you ever considered divorce?  You don’t have to answer that outloud.  But seriously, and if you’re afraid to even think about it, explore why.  Number two, what do you make divorce mean for yourself and others?  As always, I provide content to make you think, my empty nest friend.  My hope is that I am able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life.  My next episode’s title is: How to Avoid Empty Nest Syndrome.  If you enjoyed this podcast don’t forget to share it with others, it is the best way to allow it to reach a wider audience, and subscribe, too, it’s free.  Thanks!  And, divorce or not, my empty nest friend, you are amazing!

[Bloopers]

00:14:24

Still listening?  Not thinking about divorce at all but want to see where your partner lands?  Do some research on divorce on the internet.  I had about ten tabs up, and then explained to my husband the why.  I think having the courage to share that you’re visiting the sites, and seeing what comes out of it is always worth experiencing.  Think about it.  Considering divorce is powerful.  Knowing you both choose not to get a divorce, feels a lot better than always wondering if maybe you are.  And what are the reasons why you choose not to?  Are those reasons you can live with moving forward?  Accepting what is, rather than hiding from it, will always make you stronger, even if you need to work through painful emotions to get there.  Have courage. 

[Music]

[End]

118: The Benefit of Taking Time Off – Listener Requested ⚠

118: The Benefit of Taking Time Off - Listener Requested ⚠

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend,

Breaks benefit us. We know this.

Why, then, is it incredibly difficult for us to take the time for ourselves? As mothers, we tend to be experts at not taking breaks. So much so that when we do have downtime, we may not be sure what to do with ourselves. 

Hmm, a micro-level of the whole empty nest experience, isn't it? 

It might be thirty minutes sitting in your car in your driveway or a parking lot with your favorite music, or it might be more than that. Find something that will rejuvenate you in some way, and do it.

Head to your CEO of Your Life's Toolbox for inspiration.

You are amazing. Now take some time for yourself to uncover a bit more amazing-ness than you are allowing yourself to see right now.💚

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"We all know it makes sense to take the break, to rejuvenate, to get the sleep you need, to hydrate yourself, to eat well, but sometimes our protector thinks they know better."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙The podcast episode in which I talk about washi tape and breaks 💚 #TakeABreak #TakingABreak #EmptyNest  #Podcast #EmptyNestMom #EmptyNestSyndrome 

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This Episode is Brought To You By

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • A Way To Consider Breaks in Relationship to Your Protector and Your CEO Life's Toolbox
  • Reminders for Why Breaks Are Good
  • To Consider a Break

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Are you good about taking breaks in your life?
  2. When was your last break? 

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

Subscribe To This Podcast

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Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 118 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

Christine:  Hi, it’s Coach Christine.  This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast and this is episode number 118.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve introduced in prior episodes.  Should you feel a bit lost, use my show notes for best places to begin.  This episode is listener requested and I chat about taking some time off.  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

Hello, my future empty nest friend and Conscious Effective Olympian, or CEO, of your life! I’m so thankful you are listening today.  Show notes for this episode have links to anything I discuss that is linkable, and of course, you’ll find all sorts of fun stuff, and ways to work with me on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  If you enjoy this episode, I invite you to subscribe to this podcast, and to consider joining the GPS Support Flock.  What is that?  I’m so glad you asked; take a listen.

00:01:32

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon!   

 

00:02:18

Do you feel you need permission to take a break?  Isn’t it interesting that often we know we need a break.  We can feel it but something in us fights us, we’ll have thoughts such as, “I can’t take off; I’ll miss out on something,” or “The timing isn’t right,” or “It will put me at a disadvantage.”  Be curious about these.  As I was recording my thoughts for this episode it dawned on me that when we know we need the time off, but we don’t take it, guess who’s in control?  Yeah, our Protector.  Bossing us around like they love, but we need to train our Protector up, remember?  We need to trust that we know what’s best for us, even though they think they do.  They’re allowing thought-deliveries to have high-priority status that do not serve us.  Sometimes, our Protector makes someone outside of our fence’s thoughts become ours.  What I want to say to my Protector is, “Okay, calm down, I know you love your job, but I’m the boss,” try that and explore the fact that something within you is telling you that you need a break, but your Protector doesn’t want it to happen.  Be curious about what’s going on.  Who has your best interest in mind and are the thoughts that are front-and-center, for you, right now, true?

00:03:40

You may be thinking now, what breaks exactly are you talking about Coach Christine?  Well, I’m talking about any breaks: a break from your job, via vacation time; a break from your routine for a few days, or sometimes even hours, or a few minutes; a break from the things that you eat; a break from your current exercise regime, maybe things are feeling stale.  Your break here will be yours to consider.  What do you need a break from?  I bet something just came to your mind.  Be curious about that.  Maybe, even the question is who you need a break from?  And by taking the break, are the thoughts you have about the break true?  Interesting, isn’t it? 

00:04:24

My friend, you know I like to reference our CEO of our life toolbox.  Originally, I thought the “break” would be like us closing the toolbox completely.  You have it, it’s there if you need it, but you aren’t focused on any of the tools inside; however, when I was led to imagine it more like that awesome top tray that you’ve stocked with your favorite items that give you energy.  Well imagine instead, if along the sides of it, it was covered with a beautiful washi tape, of your choosing, with words such as: 

  • Take a break.

  • Don’t forget to take a break. 

  • The breaks are good. 

  • Breaks are your friend. 

  • You have time to take a break.  Future-you is waiting and she’s not in a rush.

  • Rest is good.

Choose something here that allows you to feel peaceful and energized as you step into break time, so that you feel good about it.

00:05:20

What is interesting is that this episode was requested over six months ago.  Really.  And I’m creating it on my break from my day job.  I took three days off with no formal plans, no appointments, no calls I have to make, no plans with my husband, for me to do what I want.  And as a mother, it’s pretty miraculous, right?  For me, the thing I love to do is create things.  So I created episodes for the rest of the year and it feels amazing. 

00:05:53

We all know it makes sense to take the break, to rejuvenate, to get the sleep you need, to hydrate yourself, to eat well, but sometimes our Protector thinks they know better.  Tune in, my friend, to when you know in your bones that you need to take a break, and take it. Give yourself permission, tune into your future self. You know darn well, they’ll tell you to take the break. 

00:06:28

As I record this, we are in the midst of a level of physical distancing due to COVID-19 and you may be thinking, well 2020 has been one long break, hasn’t it?  Well, have you gifted yourself with time to not worry, to not process the 8 million things that you need to do to change the world?  To allow yourself time to process who you are and to move forward? 

00:06:50

Okay, so if we’ve made it to this part and you’re still pushing back on me like, “I can’t take the break, Christine,” let’s do some reasons that we all really know, but you know, maybe you need to hear it from me today.   

  • By stepping away, you have the opportunity to see what, if anything you miss about that thing. 

  • Sometimes, you’ll gain a new perspective that you wouldn’t have seen without the break. 

  • By taking a break, you’ll show up better for yourself, and others. 

Remember that your break should be your break and look like whatever it is that you need. Figure that out for yourself, open up your life’s toolbox and read your washi tape. 

[Music]

00:07:28

The questions I have for you in this episode are, are you good at taking breaks in your life?  And, when was your last break?  As always, I provide content to make you think, my empty nest friend.  My hope is that I am able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life.  My next episode’s title is: Let's Talk About Divorce in the Empty Nest: Does the Empty Nest Cause Divorce? 

00:07:51

Do you know someone who could use this podcast?  Did you know that most people only listen to podcasts if they’ve been personally introduced to one?  Help me help others by thinking of one person you could share this podcast with, and do it. Thanks!  Happy Break Planning my empty nest friend!  Please remember, as you plan it and as you take it, that you are amazing!

[Bloopers]

00:08;36

Still listening? 

The break is worth it.  I can tell you that, because I’m on mine now.  Take the break. 

[Music]

[End]

117: It is FAFSA time & Let’s Talk About College Breaks 📅

117: It is FAFSA time & Let's Talk About College Breaks 📅

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend,

If you have a child in college, and they'll continue to be a college student next year, it is time to complete the FAFSA! 

It is also time to think about winter break. 

Whether they were on-campus or not, I've got you covered in this episode as, it isn't always a party when they return home. 🎈

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Your child will be different when they return home, whether it is their first semester in college or their fourth. I can’t tell you exactly how they’re going to be different, but I can tell you they will be different."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙The podcast episode in which I remind you that the #FAFSA is open, and we talk about how to prepare for the upcoming college breaks. 💚 #CollegeParents #CollegeBreaks  #EmptyNest  #Podcast #EmptyNestMom #EmptyNestSyndrome 

Click to Tweet

This Episode is Brought To You By

💚  Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • A Reminder that The FAFSA is Open for the 2021-2022 School Year
  • Things to Consider for the Upcoming College Breaks - Even if Your Student is Home!

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Do you need to complete the FAFSA?
  2. Are you ready for the upcoming college break?

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

Subscribe To This Podcast

It is FREE!

Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 117 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast


00:00:00

Christine:  Hi, it’s Coach Christine.  This is my podcast.  It’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast and you are now listening to episode number 117.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve introduced in prior episodes.  Should you feel a bit lost, use my show notes for best places to begin.  In this episode, I talk about the FAFSA and how to prepare for college breaks, whether your child is currently on-campus or not.

00:00:28  

I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

My future empty nest friend, and Conscious Effective Olympian, or CEO, of your life, how are you doing today?  Holy cow, there is a chance that this episode may be analogy-free.  Can I even do that?  Show notes for this episode have links to anything I discuss that is linkable, and of course, you’ll find all sorts of fun stuff, and ways to work with me on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  If you enjoy this episode, I invite you to subscribe to this podcast, and to consider joining the GPS Support Flock.  What is that?  I’m so glad you asked; take a listen.  

00:01:41

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

00:02:28  

This is a bit of an informational episode.  Use it as a reference and don’t be afraid to pop back here again, if need be, or to pause it for later.  First up, I’d like to remind you that, yes, is it FAFSA time.  This will be important to you if you are in the U.S., and your child plans to attend college in the upcoming school year.  I get that a lot of things are up in the air, but if you think there is a chance they’ll attend, I recommend doing the FAFSA.  It can’t hurt.

 00:02:54 

I’ve heard people say, “Oh no, it’s FAFSA time.  I hate doing the FAFSA. It’s awful.” I have to admit, while the result from the FAFSA doesn’t usually make me want to jump up and down with excitement, the process of actually completing it isn’t too bad.  The FAFSA is going to be as awful as you allow your mind to let it be.  So choose.  I use, “It’s FAFSA time; I’m excited to be done with it.”  It works.

 00:03:19 

If you have never done the FAFSA before, you’ll need to get the IDs first.  A parent will need one, and your student will need one.  Once you have the ID’s, you then have the actual form to complete.  All of this is available via studentaid.gov. I don’t recommend paying someone else to do the FAFSA for you.  It’s rare that this would be needed.  I’d set aside 15 minutes to create the IDs and then 30 minutes to do the FAFSA.  Both I think are padded generously, but just in case, that’ll give you a ballpark idea of how long it takes.

 00:03:51 

The FAFSA is completed every year your child is in college, so it’s good to make friends with it, if they’ll be attending.  It will pull your tax information from a prior year, so have that info handy in case it doesn’t import automatically.  You’ll find plenty of videos and free tutorials if you run into problems.  I’m not a financial aid advisor.  I’m a mom who has a daughter in her senior year, so I’ve done it four times now.

 00:04:16 

You’ll get a confirmation email in a few days that confirms it was processed and there will be an EFC number.  That number doesn’t have a dollar sign, it’s simply digits.  It represents the amount of money that the government believes you can afford to pay for your child’s education for the next year.  That’s one year.  Be prepared for this number to be more than you’d expect.  I recommend sitting down.

 00:04:39

The colleges your child applies to will use this number in determining financial aid available to them, including government loans.  Every college’s financial aid package will be different, so weigh their options carefully.  Also, consider all four years.  Look at the fine print on the awarding, to be sure you and your child are comfortable with where they’ll land before making any firm decisions.  Long story short, it’s FAFSA time and if your child plans for college next year, put it on your radar to complete in the near future, if you haven’t already.  That is my friendly reminder. 

 00:05:12

Now let’s talk about college breaks.  You may know I’ve been having a lot of fun creating Reels on Instagram.  I’m even teaching some women now, how to become comfortable with them.  Lately, I’ve been taking some information from the podcast and putting it into these little 15-second to 30-second Reels, so I am doing a series within the Reels.  Currently, one is about college breaks and how you should prepare as a parent for college breaks.  I am going to talk about both, if your child has been on campus and if your child has not.  You may gain something out of both, but if you want to jump to one section, check my show notes for time markers. 

 00:05:48

For those of you whose child has been on-campus:

First, be prepared for a routine change, again. When your child left for college, your routine in the household changed and it impacted everyone, even the pets.  When your college-student returns home, they’ll be used to the old routine and the rest of you won’t, so be prepared for change.  Second, expect them to be tired.  They have been going nonstop while they are away, and even if they had less activities than anyone expected, due to being on a campus with physical distancing, trust me, the emotional toll of being in that environment is exhausting and they more than likely couldn’t stop.  They had to keep going.  So the moment they cross the threshold of your home, wherever you live, they are going to feel like their five-year-old self safe and comfortable, whether that’s where they lived when they were five or not.  I know, some of you are going to get technical with me there.  But hopefully, they know they feel safe here.

 00:06:44 

Expect them to be really tired, expect them to go into this decompress mode.  They more than likely won’t be planning it.  It will be something that happens.  They may not even be aware they need it.  Don’t be surprised if they disappear for two days in their room which, you know, maybe they should be quarantining anyway.  If they don’t, so be it.  But if they do, I don’t want you to be surprised.  I warned you.  Third, set some expectations.  We already talked about how routines will be off-kilter a bit again.  Take some time now, ahead of time to think about how your routine before they left is different from how it is now.  Do you want it all to go back to the way it was?  Is there something new that you want to make sure doesn’t change?  Address it now.  Maybe you don’t want to do their laundry.  Set those expectations before they get home, but also be okay if their laundry doesn’t get washed on day one, unless you set that expectation.  Get the idea?

 00:07:33

You also may want to check in with them and ask them what they’re really looking forward to, in case that’s something you could do without.  Remove the tension later.  Take the time to be curious about what you love now and what you want to stay.  Have fun with this and get creative.  By looking at this early and addressing it, will remove some tension on your time together.  So think ahead and figure out what, if anything, should be addressed.  

 00:07:59 

Fourth, your child will be different when they return home, whether it’s their first semester in college or their fourth.  I can’t tell you exactly how they’re going to be different, but I can tell you they will be different.  Independence changes a person in all sorts of ways.  Take the opportunity to get to know them all over again.  Remove your assumptions about who they were and get to know who they are now.

 00:08:23 

My next tip is for both parents whose college-student has been on-campus and for parents who have had their child home.  Take some time to celebrate where you are today and that you’ve made it to a milestone, and you should take some time to celebrate.  It doesn’t need to be a huge celebration.  I have a minimalist mindset, so I’d celebrate with a walk to get coffee, or a specifically chosen movie night, with maybe some special food.  But this is your celebration, make it what works for you and your family.  Give yourself a pat on the back for navigating all of your emotions through this semester.  Make sure you also tell your child how proud you are of them.  If you are having trouble finding this, take some time to really look.  You’ll find it.  Celebrate. 

 00:09:07

If your child did not move out of your home for this semester, here are a couple of tips I have for you.  First, if you haven’t already, talk about the spring semester.  Discuss the options available for your student, if there are any.  If an option to move-on campus suddenly arrives, is that something they’d want to do?  Do they definitely want to stay home again?  Is there anything they would like to have different, if they do stay home?  The same question for you.  If they want to go back to campus, take the opportunity to be curious about the emotions and thoughts that arise in you.  Provide them a safe space to share.  I’d also recommend having this conversation or conversations outside of the celebration space.  Celebration is for celebration.  It’s also okay to celebrate even if you don’t know what is next, in case somebody needs that permission.  More than likely you aren’t sure of all of your options, yet.  But have fun exploring what they could be and what life might be like if you have them available. 

 

00:10:08

Second, take the opportunity to notice if anything has changed about your child this semester.  Yes, even while at home.  They may not have been able to experience the level of independence that attending classes on campus would have given them, but take a moment to notice the child in your home, that they would have returned different.  Where do your thoughts go?  Are you happy they’re still at home?  Happy for the extra time?  Are you bummed for them, that they didn’t get to experience the on-campus life?  If so, add “yet” to the end of that statement and how does that feel? 

 00:10:41

I’ll be honest, my child went to campus.  I may not be able offer much here, but I’d love to know how you feel, if this is you.  Do you have tips, tricks, thoughts for other parents in your situation?  If so, I’d love to share them with my audience on social media.  I’m done recording episodes for 2020, otherwise I’d slide it into an upcoming episode.  But if you email me at Christine@youremptynestcoach.com or message me on Instagram, @emptynestcoach, I’d love to share.  Oh, I also could add this in my monthly email, or of course, the flock!  Yes, yes.  You should join the flock.

[Music]

00:11:18

The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, do you need to complete the FAFSA?  And, two, are you ready for the upcoming college break?  As always, I provide content to make you think, my empty nest friend.  My hope is that I am able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life.  My next episode’s title is: The Benefit of Taking Time Off.  This one is listener requested.

00:11:44

Are you able to screenshot this episode right now?  If so, take a minute to do that and then to share it on social media to help others find it.  That would be incredibly helpful.  Be sure to tag me @emptynestcoach so I may personally thank you.  Happy FAFSAing and prepping for that upcoming college break!  You, my empty nest friend, are amazing!

[Bloopers]

00:12:52

Still listening? 

This semester has been odd. We usually only see our daughter once prior to Thanksgiving, if we are lucky.  She’s a few states away.  But this is her senior year, and she has her senior art show and thesis, and we can’t go.  It totally makes sense.  Hubby and are good with it.  We don’t need to be on the college campus, but it’s yet another thing that who would have thought we wouldn’t be doing this year.  Have you had any of these moments lately?

[Music]

[End]

116: Laughing At Yourself – Are you a tissue box or a tissue 😂

116: Laughing At Yourself - Are you a tissue box or a tissue 😂

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend,

In this episode, I spill the beans on an embarrassing moment in my middle school years. I had not planned to dive into that story, but ideas and concepts sometimes appear, and I go with the flow.

Goodness gracious, there is so much power in laughing at yourself. 

This episode topic originated from an Instagram Reel where I poked fun at "life coaches" (mostly myself) and our my abundant use of analogies. 

And when I say extreme use - a few of you thought I was serious with my Reel - which made me laugh at myself more. 😂 Thank you for that.

Consider for a moment what life would be like if you laughed at yourself a bit more: not in a cruel way but a, "Well, I see the silliness in that, and I don't take myself too seriously," kind of way.

In the end, it may alleviate the pain a bit when another human laughs because you've already released the power the situation could have held on your life. 

Cheers and Giggles!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"What if your protector could slide on a pair of sunglasses that had a funny filter. Would anything change for you?"

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙The episode in which I share about making fun of myself, share an embarrassing story from middle school, and consider how powerful humor can be. 💚 #findthefunny in your life.   #EmptyNest  #Podcast #EmptyNestMom #EmptyNestSyndrome 

Click to Tweet

This Episode is Brought To You By

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • What Happened When I Recently Poked Fun at Myself
  • An Embarrassing Story from My Middle School Years
  • To Consider Giving Your Protector a Pair of Glasses That Have a Humor Filter

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. How serious do you take yourself?
  2. Does the tissue box analogy need to die?

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

Subscribe To This Podcast

It is FREE!

Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 116 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

Christine: Hi, it’s Coach Christine.  This is my podcast, it is the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast and this is episode number 116.  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:46

Hello, my future empty nest friend and Conscious Effective Olympian, or CEO, of your life!  Are you feeling CEO-like, yet? I sure hope so.  Show notes for this episode have links to anything I discuss in this episode that is linkable, and of course, you’ll find all sorts of fun stuff, and ways to work with me on my website.  That’s YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Of course, I think you are amazing, and I’d love for you to subscribe to this podcast, or better yet join my flock. What is that?  I’m so glad you asked.  Take a listen.

00:01:22

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

00:02:06

If you aren't yet following me on Instagram, what are you doing with your life?  Seriously, though, I've re-discovered that I have a tendency to be funny there, specifically in Reels, sometimes I do it on purpose and sometimes, not so much.  But it’s okay.  I will laugh at myself and you know I love to giggle.  I’ve noticed about myself that the more in tune I am with the weight of my actions, or the happenings of my life, in relation to the longevity of my life, well, things simply don’t have the level of gravity that I used to once give them.  I mean, a typo on a post?  I used to lose sleep over it, now I let it go, and some I’ve let stay up on socials.  What?  The me of five years ago would have a freak out session over that.

00:02:57

I’ve found the more clear my mind is, the more I have trained my Protector and organized my thought deliveries, the more I am able to find humor in life.  And, I’ve shared with you in a prior episode how powerful laughter can be for us as humans.  There is a power in not taking yourself seriously.  There is power in knowing that, yeah, you are fallible.  Of course you are, you are human.  And what if you laugh at yourself before the world does?  Power.  Power, my friend.

00:03:28

So what is the tissue box all about?  In one of my Instagram Reel videos I decided to poke fun at life coaches.  Yes, I’m a life coach.  Yes, I use a lot of analogies and in the challenge I was in we were challenged to make fun of our industry (tastefully).  I landed with, well, let me play the audio for you:

The things you think about are when you start small, ants can find you.  You’re either the tissue box, or the tissue.

I’m back, and wouldn’t you know it, someone heard this and went looking for my episode about the tissue box.  I had to explain that I was poking fun at myself but maybe it was a little too close to reality if that happened.  In the end, I promised I would deliver this episode about it.  Maybe this analogy should be a group project, after all? 

00:04:20

But my real question is, do you take yourself seriously?  Too seriously?  I’m not talking about standing up for your rights, that’s a given.  Please, my friend, do that.  Stand up for yourself.  I’m talking about the other things, the analogies you use constantly (like me); the odd food choices you may have; the obsessions you have that aren’t hurting anyone, those things.  Or maybe the fact that sure, you are in your late forties and love to dress up for halloween.  No, that one’s not actually me.  Is it you?  I challenge you to stop for a moment right now and think of something today that you did that was funny.  Can you find something?

00:04:57

I’m not even talking side-splitting funny, although that’s good too, but maybe slightly amusing if someone else did it, or that you laughed out loud at yourself when it happened.  Or that you thought was very serious, but looking at it through a different lens, you’re like, that’s kind of funny.  Did you find anything?  Go ahead and hit pause, if you need to.

00:05:16

All right.  You’re back.  I did some very scientific research for this episode.  Yes, you know, Google.  And in the rabbit hole of the google search, I did find a lovely TedX Cape May video featuring Brad Jenkins and it was about, you guessed it, laughing at yourself.  Definitely worth a watch.  A few articles also discussed the power of not taking yourself so seriously.  When I did another highly scientific search on Google, using “making fun of yourself,” I found that in the top three results, number two was titled: “How Making Fun of Yourself Can Make You Happy,” and number three was, “It’s Not Okay to Make Fun of Yourself.”  Goodness gracious, and do we wonder why humans are completely confused all of the time? 

00:06:05

It did make me wonder about the difference, though.  What would make it good versus bad?  This is my Coach Christine theory and I would love to know what you think about it.  My theory is that it comes down to how well your Protector is trained and what type of energy you have in your life.  I’m going to share with you now one of the most embarrassing things I remember from my middle school years. At almost-50 years old, I can finally think of this day and see past the humiliation and into the humor. 

True story, although I may be off on details, because I’m the type of person that remembers feelings, big concepts more than specific details.  

00:06:43

I remember that my schedule was very off that year, and I think it was because I took a lot of shop classes, but I had lunch at different times almost every day of the week.  And this one time was not with my larger group of friends.  I have no idea if I normally sat all by myself that day, or if I was waiting for those who normally sat with me.  I got through the line, placed my food down, and I remember clearly that I had parachute pants on. Ahhh, remember those?  Something felt off.  The energy felt weird.  I could hear more whispers than normal but I stayed in my own world and was about to eat my food. 

00:07:21

Then, someone came up to me and said, “Your period is through your pants, maybe you should use a tampon.”   Were those her exact words?  Honestly, I have no idea, and it probably wasn’t as brutal as what I made it sound like.  All I remember is “period through pants” and I remember “tampon”.  Everything then went into slow motion.  I think she tried helping me, and asked if I had a sweater, but my guess is I left my food there and disappeared quickly.  In my head every single person in the school saw it and I would be forever known as “period pants girl.”

00:07:54

I remember getting to the nurse’s office, our school was pretty big, so the navigation wouldn’t have been quick.  I refused to leave the nurse’s office, and had the nurse call my mom.  My mother was not home.  One of my mother’s friends was. She picked me up and drove me home and I thought I would never enter the school building again, ever.  Tears?  Yes.  This day haunted me periodically (pun wasn’t initially intended but I decided to keep it in), for years and years.  And this isn’t an uncommon experience, I mean, google period leak and you’ll get quite the stories.  Perimenopause is like puberty all over again and in some ways, I kind of feel like this could happen again.  So yeah, round and round we go. 

00:08:40

Back to middle school.  I swore that day I would be known as “period pants girl” forever.  Forever.  Well, maybe I am known for that still, or will be now, now that I shared it here.  But now, now I am “period pants girl with a podcast.”  Oh my gosh, so funny.  Now that I’m on embarrassing stories, I’ll just open the flood gates.  I actually think I also had a really late aged wet bed thing at a sleepover, too.   Okay.  Shall we relive all of my embarrassments from childhood and puberty, today?  Wouldn’t that be fun? 

00:09:22

Anyway, my message is don’t take yourself so seriously.  I mean, let’s imagine for a moment that we could go back in time, not that I’d want to, but instead of me being mortified for weeks on end, I’m sure it lasted at least that long, what if I was like, yeah, that’s me, I owned it, and then I created something that would help other girls in situations like that?  What if I actually could have risen above the embarrassment enough to realize that the young lady who told me about it was my hero that day?  In the moment I saw her as someone who took pleasure in telling me that I was a hot mess.  But in reality, no one else said anything.  She did.  She was amazing. 

00:10:04

Had I not taken myself so seriously, I could have thanked her properly.  I also probably could have laughed.  I remember people trying to “comfort” me, the adults in my life, I don’t think I laughed though.  I mean, “period pants girl with a podcast,” that is funny.  I could do a whole series about that.  “Period parachute pants girl” is funny, too.  Sure, it was embarrassing.  I probably missed more than a few great moments being stuck in my obscured thought-deliveries about being “period pants girl.”  I hear you thinking, “But, Christine, you were a teenager.  That is what teenagers do.  They think their whole world is so serious, and one thing like that will ruin it forever.”  Back then, yeah, I was an awkward kid trying to figure out well, anything and everything.

00:10:50

But here’s today’s challenge: I challenge you to consider that you are a different awkward human trying to figure out anything and everything.  You’re in a different stage of life.  I bet there are things in your life right now, that you take just as seriously that you of 20 years from now, future you, would be like, “Oh my gosh, chill out.  It doesn’t matter.”  Think about it.  And when you can tune into that, now, life gets funny.  It gets funny now, instead of 20 years from now. Look at the truth about you, about your life, look at it in perspective of your entire life and stop taking yourself so darn serious, friend.

00:11:32

Laughter is a reset.  Imagine being able to have more of it in your life by simply observing the humor in yourself.  Put those happenings of your life in perspective.  The truth, after all, can be funny.  What if your Protector could slide on a pair of sunglasses that had a funny filter?  You know, like Instagram or SnapChat, just swipe.  That would be even cooler.  Would anything in your life change for you?  It doesn’t mean that you laugh at everything.  Remember, a well trained protector allows you to be truly conscious in your life, to be off of auto-pilot and to respond in a way that you are proud of, and that brings peace to your life and to the lives of others, to bring positive energy.  Let’s be real. You’re going to mess up in life.  I am going to mess up in life.  I’ll tell you that right now.  It’s what humanity is all about.

00:12:22

What if we start looking for those moments not only to learn from but also to entertain ourselves?  What is my point?  Hmm... and with my humor filter on, I’m wondering if I have one.  After all, I’m not sure if you are a tissue box or the tissue.  Maybe the tissue box is you stuffed all inside taking yourself way too seriously.  It isn’t until you find the humor in your life that you are able to begin to serve others (maybe then you become a tissue that can help).  Although, then you get thrown in the trash, so I’m not sure that’s a great analogy on any level.  But, hey, if you have an idea for it, please share it with us!

00:13:03

Let me leave you with this, you and I have been on this planet for more than a few years.  There is a high probability that all of us have been embarrassed, done dreadful things, been awful to others, been inconsiderate, been unempathetic, been dismissive, and well, the list goes on.  I would hope that you are now quite leveled-up from the you of your younger years, heck even the you of last year or last month.  Hopefully, not only we are doing our best to become better humans but we also are able to view experiences, past, present and future, in a new light.  Maybe we can start sending thought deliveries back to our Protector and ask them to put on the funny filter, or put on different types of glasses.  Maybe we need clip-on glasses for different lens types.  Ooo, more analogies, and now, we’re back to the beginning.  Around we go.

00:14:00

Okay.  If you’ve listened to more than a handful of my episodes, you must not mind analogies either.  I’m thankful for you.  I’m thankful for that kind soul who pointed out my period stained parachute pants, I’m thankful for the moments in my life that entertain me, like today when I went to put the eggs in a cabinet and not the fridge, and for me,today also, typing the words “period pants girl with a podcast.”  See, life is funny. By the way, you really should join our flock.  We’re waiting for you!  Let’s find the funny in our lives together, friend. 

[Music]

00:14:33

The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, how serious do you take yourself?  And two, should we just let this tissue box analogy go now?  Have a beautiful day friend.  You are amazing!

[Bloopers]

00:15:25

Still listening? 

What are you listening to next? I’m so curious!

[Music]

[End]