112: When We are Forced to Change Course 🆗

112: When We are Forced to Change Course 🆗

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

Sometimes challenges - and opportunities - pop up in our life. What do you make them mean? I explore this in today's episode.

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Life isn’t a one way, smooth sailing go-kart course, or street.  It has detours.  It has bumps.  It has U-turns sometimes.  Yes, sometimes we change course consciously, by making a decision, or we change our mind.  But other times, life forces us to change course for one reason or another."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

🎙An unexpected challenge - or opportunity - is in your life? What are you making it mean? Coach Christine discusses in this #Podcast episode #EmptyNest  #Podcast #WomenEmpoweringWomen  #Opportunities #Challenges💚

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What You Will Learn in this Episode 

  • An Analogy for When Life Takes You Off Your Expected Course

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. How do you do when you are forced to change course?
  2. Will this analogy help next time you are forced to change course?

💚  Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now:   https://www.speakpipe.com/EmptyNestCoach  or call/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

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FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 112 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast


00:00:00

Christine:  Hi, it’s Coach Christine. This is my podcast; it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast.  Today I discuss When We are Forced to Change Course, and it’s episode number 112.  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

00:00:49

Hello, my empty nest friend and CEO of Your Life!  Let’s imagine for a moment that you are about to get into a gocart in an imaginary, miles-long track that you know very well.  You put a helmet on, you take a moment to sit down properly.  You place your feet where they are supposed to be, seatbelts are clicked in and you do your safety checks.  I’m not sure what those are, as it has been a long time since I was in a go-kart. 

00:01:20

Now, before we walk through what happens next, a quick reminder, that if you find yourself talking back to me at any part of this episode; if something resonates with you; or if you have a quick tip to share with my audience, please take the opportunity to leave me audio feedback either through SpeakPipe or my Google Voice number.  You’ll find the information to do this in the description of this episode: on Apple Podcasts click “Details”; on Spotify click “See More”; on Overcast press the I for information button. Get the idea?  You also may send me an email at podcast@youremptynestcoach.com.  Of course, I always have full show notes with links to anything I discuss in the episode, and a full episode transcription on my website.  Those reside at YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P (for podcast) and 112 (for this episode’s number).  (YourEmptyNestCoach.com/P112).  I can’t wait to hear from you!

00:02:14

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

00:03:02

Back to the go-kart.  [Go-kart sound]  Imagine that you are on a course that you know very well.  It isn’t short, actually the reason you love this course so much is that you have it all worked out in your mind on the path you will take.  This one even gives you some options, in portions of the course, which-fork-in-the-road you’ll take sort of thing.  You are partial to one of the tracks and take it most of the time, but today, today you know there is a new segment that has been added and it will take you through a beautiful clearing that you’ve only heard about before.

00:03:42

You’ve done your research. You know exactly the path to take to get there.  After all, you’ve seen the signs and construction over the last few runs, and you can’t wait to experience that new segment.  Everythings ready, you start off. You feel the air rush past your body as you speed toward the route you love.  Some lefts, some rights, some ups and downs, you’ve done your practice and leveling up on those to know exactly how to handle them.  Those spin outs from your early days are a faint memory and you just keep going.  There’s the waterfall you love driving by as you can feel a slight mist on your face.  You turn the bend and know that the new segment is up ahead, but when you get there, you see that the new road isn’t ready yet.  The no entry sign is still up and you have a lot to process in a split second.   

00:04:40

We had a plan.  We know where we want to go, but we can’t go the way we had planned, for whatever reason. Now, I’ve talked about this before.  We have options in how we choose to react to the happenings in our life.  Let’s imagine that for a moment we could freeze-frame where we are.  We could stop our go-kart and make a scene.  Well, we could even get out of the kart, knock down the barrier and keep going out of sheer stubbornness.  Typically not the best option but it is an option.  We could stop the gocart in a safe spot, regroup ourselves, feel the disappointment, take it in and then move forward.

00:05:22

We could be annoyed and give up go-karting forever, even turning the go-kart around and heading back to the beginning.  That doesn’t sound like the safest option but you could do it.  And then there is the option to see the barrier; it’s there for the time being, decide it won’t be there forever and keep going forward on your usual path.  Since we are already imagining a course that doesn’t exist, and have freeze-framed it, I’d like to give you some insight on why the barrier is there.  A sinkhole opened up overnight that no one had expected, of course.  The course operators left the barrier up, but were excited to open up a route just a tiny bit further down the course that will still allow you to get to that new clearing while avoiding the sink hole.  You couldn’t have known this.  Actually, no one does, outside of the course operator who’s currently working on updating their website and letting their clients know.

00:06:16

Let’s go back to our freeze-framed options.  Option 1 has us making a scene, using up a ton of energy, complaining about the circumstance.  That’s energy we could have avoided if we had just kept going.  When we get back in the go-kart, you are so busy wrapped up in the drama that we have created in our minds, that we don’t see the new opening. I would normally say, your Protector is in full control and throwing thought-deliveries in your house and you let it happen.

00:06:46

Option 2, that we discussed, has us taking a moment to take a breather in a safe spot.  We regroup, work through our disappointment, but all while taking in the moment we see the new opening ahead that we wouldn’t have seen otherwise.  Curious now?  We get in our go-kart to check things out.  This is you feeling the feeling, reminding your Protector who is in control and considering the thought deliveries that are available to you.  Allowing you to move forward in a more peaceful place and open to new opportunities.

00:07:26

Option 3 was to give up go-karting altogether. We were so close, and that is drastic, plus we risk injury and accident driving the wrong way on the course.  Goodness gracious.  Option 4 has us seeing the barrier, and resolving quickly to be okay with it and keep going on the course we’ve always been on.  Hey, it’s fun, anyway.  While we miss the new opening, the sign was easy to miss, we get the notification as soon as you get back and have the opportunity to go try again with minimal drama.

00:08:00

How does this analogy resonate with you?  Life isn’t a one way, smooth sailing go-kart course, or street.  It has detours.  It has bumps.  It has U-turns sometimes.  Yes, sometimes we change course consciously, by making a decision, or we change our mind.  But other times, life forces us to change course for one reason or another.  Sometimes there is a new opening right away, sometimes it shows up ages later, or never, but when we spend more time in the mental drama that our Protector would like us to spin in, then we could easily miss the beautiful moments we so desperately want, or that we never even expected could happen.

00:08:47

My beautiful friend, when you clear out the drama in your mind, you’ll gain power and time in your life that you wish you had all along.  I talked a bit about thought-deliveries and your Protector in this episode.  I mention these in earlier episodes, if you are curious to learn more, see my show notes for links on those.  Also, this episode is similar to my Spider Web of Life  concept that I talk about in episode number 26.  In that one, the angle’s a bit more for when you make the decision to change.  But either analogy could work for this. You know me, always looking for new analogies for this journey called life.  Why a go-kart?  Honestly, I have no idea.  It popped in my head, and I went with it.

00:09:32

Of course, if you would like to dig into more detail with any of this, if you need accountability, or want me to cheer you on, all of this is included in my GPS Support Flock where you can comment right below the episode.  The questions I have for you in this episode are, one, how do you do when you are forced to change course?  And number two, will this analogy help next time you are forced to change course?  Check your thought-deliveries, train your protector, become CEO, the Conscious Effective Olympian, of your life and always remember that you are amazing!  See ya!

[Bloopers]

00:10:30

Still listening?  I have some major things simmering in my mind lately.  Is there anything simmering in yours?  I’d love to know.  And I can hear you now, “Christine, I’m simmering on everything it is 2020.”  Well your recipe should be in great shape when this simmer is over! At least that is the thought I’m choosing to use for mine.  Check out that simmering episode in the show notes.  Simmer, simmer, simmer, simmer. 

[Music]

[End]

107: Empty Nest Transition Resources ⭐

107: Empty Nest Transition Resources ⭐

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend, 

Here we go. Another attempt at college during a pandemic. What an adventure for all of us - whether your child is heading back to campus with face masks, symptom monitoring, physical distancing, and no group hangouts, or if they are home.

No matter the choices that your family has made, motherhood is an adventure. Empty nesting shows up in our lives a little bit differently for each of us, but in the end, we all are doing our best to navigate this thing called life. If you need help discovering your future self, I'm here for you when you are ready to get to work. 

Take deep breaths, my empty nest friend (or future empty nest friend), and do your best to enjoy the ride. 

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"I thought I would do a quick rundown of resources that I have available to you as you adjust to the empty nest - and for some of you the not-so-empty-nest."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

New Podcast Episode🎙Coach Christine shares resources she has created specifically for mothers who are having trouble adjusting to the idea of the empty nest (not-so-empty-nest, too)! 💚 #EmptyNest #NotSoEmptyNest  #EmptyNestSyndrome 

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FULL TRANSCRIPT: 

Episode 107 of the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

00:00:00

You are listening to the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast  with Coach Christine - Episode #107: Empty Nest Transition Resources.  I work with mothers of high school students and beyond, who are in the trenches with sad and possibly, overwhelming thoughts about what their life will look like when their baby heads to college and begins to leave the nest.  My clients’ big question is what will I do with my time?  Is this you?  I’ve been there, and I get it.  Empowering you to write the next jaw-dropping, amazing chapter in your life is my passion.  I am energized by leading you in the process of exploration and am thrilled when you unlock the power that lies within you.  This podcast is my gift to you.

[intro] - be sure to use new 2020 intro: podcast creation files folder

Hello, my empty nest friend and CEO of Your Life! 

00:00:45

Tomorrow, our daughter heads off to her senior year of college, in the midst of a year that continues to challenge the resilience of all humans. As promised in my last episode, this episode is going to be a quick one. I thought I would do a quick rundown of resources that I have available to you as you adjust to the empty nest - and for some of you the not-so-empty-nest.

First I’ll start with the podcast. Many of the episodes and resources I have created are pre-pandemic, so adjust as needed, as you listen. 

00:01:20

In episode 2, I discuss Is the Empty Nest real?, and some ways to combat the sadness and loneliness - remember, you aren’t alone. I created this entire podcast for amazing humans just like you. 

In episodes 3 - 7 - I dive into how much power you are giving away in your life through the thoughts in your mind. This is a deeper series and you’ll find the concept of thought deliveries throughout my podcast episodes. 

I have episodes on specific areas such as when you aren’t a fan of your child’s major (episode 9), how to get rid of guilt (episode 18), now that you have more time together - maybe your partner is driving you crazy? (episode 25), maybe you have no idea what to do with your time ahead - then check out episode 29, or if you’re looking on how to find friends in the empty nest: episode 31.

00:02:14

I also have interviews with experts - one of my favorites for the first semester is my chat with Katy Oliveira in episode 28 where we chat about what mom should expect during the first semester in college

I did a not-so-empty-nest-series when the physical distancing began for our family, and the wrap up of that series you may find particularly useful if your student is staying home for all (or part) of the school year - for whatever reason.

00:02:42

Of course, I have the GPS Support Flock Membership that will quickly fill your empty nest with ideas, thoughts, and activities for you to begin to discover who you are beneath all of the roles you’ve had for the last 18 or so years. Should you be interested in learning more about those, check out my free on-demand training session: Why You Don’t Know What is Next For Your Life.

I’ve also been hanging out in Pinterest Stories lately, and have tried a few Instagram Reels - you may want to check those out. 

00:03:12

Of course, there is my website where you may search for anything I’ve discussed - that is  YourEmptyNestCoach.com. Should you be looking for quick tips and thoughts I’ve shared with others, be sure to check out my media & press page for additional interviews or posts that I’ve done on other people’s websites or podcasts - you’ll find this by clicking on Work With Christine and there you’ll find Media & Press in that sub-menu. 

00:03:37

Yes, fall 2020 is going to look different than fall 2019. That’s a given.  If you find yourself, now,  spiraling in thoughts that their school life should look different, that maybe it isn’t fair to them - or to you -  ask yourself, “why?” Why do I believe that it should it look different?  Did you get a different life-manual than I did that promises you things like the world you know isn’t going to change drastically? Yes, I am sneaking in a little bit of tough love here. But, I like to do that. Remember that when you live in the should have, you are arguing with reality. Look at what it IS, what is right now in your life, and choose to move forward. If you aren’t dead, my beautiful friend, how about you choose living in the now, rather than arguing with it and living in the should-haves. 

00:04:30

Feel those emotions, and try remembering this: PSPF - Patience for self, Self-Love, Patience for Others, and Fun: Be patient with yourself as you adjust to the next segment of your life’s journey, shower yourself with love - especially in your thoughts, have patience for your partner and other household members as they are navigating the change, too. Remember that their emotions don’t have to match yours, and don’t forget to have some fun along the way.  PSPF.

00:05:03

Okay, while you’re getting this on Friday, I’m off to enjoy the final week at home with my daughter - unless there is a last minute “hey, we’re all going all online” announcement - yeah, let’s keep it real - this is 2020.  

I think I already talked longer than I had planned. Thanks for listening, today. I appreciate you more than you know. 

00: 05:21

I was invited to chat with the amazing and wonderful Lauren Kinghorn of Inspiring Mompreneurs. It was great to connect with her, after meeting virtually online probably over a year ago . Take a listen and learn all about my grope calls - I mean group calls - yeah, nothing like getting that wrong in an interview - [giggle] - she has our chat on YouTube as well. Links, as always are in my show notes. 

00:05:58

My resilient friend, you are navigating a journey that no one could have expected a year ago. Your choices are right because they are the choices you have made - live in the now and consciously choose when you are thinking about the future -  always remembering that YOU, my beautiful friend, ARE AMAZING! Have a great day!

[bloopers]

00:06:35

Thanks!  Thank you!  It’s time to thank our sponsor.  This episode is sponsored by my membership community, The GPS Support Flock; Your Flight to Success in the Empty Nest.  If you are ready to find the GPS of your life, sign up to receive an immediate and free download of my PDF, "How to Find Yourself in the Empty Nest," our GPS Life Principles document.  You will also have the opportunity to learn about our community.  See the link in this episode's show notes or fly on over to my website, YourEmptyNestCoach.com.  Click the GPS Support Flock button.  See you soon! 

[End]

Re-invented: Creating Purpose, Prosperity and Confidence at 40, 50 and Beyond

Register Today for Re-invented: Creating Purpose, Prosperity and Confidence at 40, 50 and Beyond

Re-Invented
Online Retreat

Sign up now for a free online Retreat for women, all about Re-Inventing yourself! It includes me, along with talented other speakers, teachers, and thought leaders!  I invite you to register today to receive emails when it is live on February 28th.

Dawn Grossart’s energy is uplifting. Our session recording was tremendously fun, and we could have chatted for hours. Dawn’s free Re-Invented Online Retreat exemplifies her love of women’s empowerment: what a gift she is giving us! ~Christine Maziarz, Your Empty Nest Coach

Dawn has invited World-Renowned Experts as seen on:

  • BBC
  • Cosmopolitan
  • Vogue
  • The Telegraph
  • Daily Mail

This sounds fantastic, Christine, yes, please add me to the guest list.

Listen to Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.

Book Review: Happinest by Judy Holland

Happinest, Finding Fulfillment When Your Kids Leave Home by Judy Holland

Book Review

I am honored that I was asked to endorse the book, Happinest by Judy Holland. The photo is of me holding my pre-released copy of the book – so much fun!

I enjoyed reading the manuscript, months ago, and look forward to diving back into the book, which is available for purchase now. It also has been rated one of the 6 new Self-Help Books for Better Living by AARP.

Your Empty Nest Coach, Christine, holds Judy Holland's book: Happinest, Finding Fulfillment When Your Kids Leave Home

HappiNest: Finding Fulfillment After Your Kids Leave Home is a valuable resource for empty nesters. Judy Holland has expertly curated interviews, quotes, research studies, and statistics to comfort, inspire and encourage those of us who are heading into or who are in the empty nest. ~Christine Maziarz, Your Empty Nest Coach

No matter where you fall in the empty nest journey, there is something of value in this book for you. Judy covers immense topics with well-researched information within each one:

  • Finding Yourself
  • Empty Nest Relationships
  • Guiding Your Fledglings
  • Words of Wisdom

Additional Information:

Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield

# of Pages: 242

This is my first book review using a rating system. I’ve landed on “happy chicks” as my rating guide. A book may receive up to five happy chicks from me. Happy chicks, for me, means both happy mothers and happy children (of any age). I’m pleased to give this a five out of five happy chicks rating.

A click on the photo will take you to a non-affiliate Amazon Link.

Have you read this book? What are your thoughts? I invite you to share below.


If you are about to enter or are in the midst of your empty nest journey, I invite you to join my email list (below)! I also have weekly podcast episodes created for you. Subscribe to my podcast now in your favorite app: the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast!

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.

47: Is this all just positive thinking?

Hello, my ah-mazing empty nest friend!
 
I can see how others might think that I’m all about positive thinking. Sure, the story you tell yourself has a lot to do with it, but it doesn’t matter what you tell yourself if you don’t believe it — more on that in this episode.
 
Take a listen or read the full transcript below. 
 
⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll all the way down ⇓ so you don’t miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓
 
Want to subscribe to this podcast? Great news – it is free!
> Click here, and then choose your favorite podcast app – be sure to hit subscribe or follow, once you choose your favorite!
Let me know if you have any additional questions – as I am always happy to explain how podcasts work!

GPS Support Flock Member?

Click here to discuss this episode with the flock. 💬

This Episode is Brought To You By

What You Will Learn in this Episode

    • Why this work isn’t just positive thinking
    • The power in believing thoughts that others give you – and that you give yourself
    • How to use “six arms” in your life

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. What do you think: is it all just positive thinking? 
  2. Will “six arms” be helpful to you?

Announcements

💚 Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now:   https://www.speakpipe.com/EmptyNestCoach  or call/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

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Full Transcript

You are preparing for the empty nest ahead as your child(ren) prepares, heads off to, and experiences college.