137: A Mother’s Day Message 2021 (The Daily Experiment)💚

137: A Mother's Day Message 2021 ( The Daily Experiment)💚

Hello, my amazing friend!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"To my friends who dislike this day because they are a Mother but their family just treats it like any other day: Yes, this happens. Please remember this one day is not the be all and end all to how they show your love. They love you, but they may not show it today. If you are still having a hard time feeling thankful, go back to my first two comments above and try looking at life a bit differently. Then treat yourself today. You are worth it."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

@emptynestcoach 's podcast episode today: A Mother's Day Message 💚

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This Episode is Brought To You By

Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers

  • 00:44 Quick Reminders
  • 01:15 A Mother's Day Message

💚Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

* affiliate link to SupaPass - which powers our community - coming soon! Should you purchase using the link, I make a commission. 

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The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 137

FULL TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00

Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #137.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve used in prior episodes - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian. You’ll do this by leveling-up 

[level-up music]

your life in small increments - those small wins add up to big changes.

I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode today. Here we go…

[short intro music]

00:00:44

Quick reminders: I’m in the midst of super short daily episodes to combat a busy time in my life. For the details on that check out episode #135. You’ll find the answer to all of your questions, where I’ve been and more on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com. I love feedback on the episodes and if you enjoy this, don’t forget to follow or subscribe in your favorite podcast player. SupaPass who powers our online community - that’s coming soon - is our fabulous episode sponsor. 

00:01:15

Today I’m sharing something I found that I wrote and posted to Facebook back in 2016 - this was back when I posted on Facebook regularly. So, it’s been a while. I tweaked it a tiny bit and I share it with you today.

To my friends who think of their mother in heaven, today: 

Know that your mother lives in you. She’s proud of you, and she loves you. Remember those great moments together and I am sending you a hug. 

To my friends who think of their child in heaven, today: 

I have no words. Love. I send you love.

To my friends who have estranged relationships with their mother or child: 

I pray that peace will enter your lives this year - for both of you and that closure and the rekindling of a relationship - if possible and healthy - enters your life. May love win overall. Remember the good times even if they are hard to find.

To my friends who aren’t “Moms:”

I can’t begin to tell you how important you are to me. No matter your age, gender, race or how we know each other, YOU help me to be the mother I am. You listen even when you may not have a clue what I’m talking about and even when you may not want to hear me talk about my child anymore. You have NO idea how important that is to me and how much it helps me to be a better mother. THANK YOU.

And to my friends who dislike this day because they are a Mother but their family just treats it like any other day: 

Yes, this happens. Please remember this one day is not the be all and end all to how they show your love. They love you, but they may not show it today. If you are still having a hard time feeling thankful, go back to my first two comments above and try looking at life a bit differently.  Then treat yourself today. You are worth it.

To my friends who love this day because it is all about them and they feel the love from their family:

You are truly blessed. Enjoy every minute. You deserve it.

00:03:28

As I read through that, there’s probably a few things I’d tweak even a little more but you get the idea.

 I’ll be back tomorrow talking about the topic of shared future goals.

Be sure to check your feed every day for the next week or so for a new episode from me, and DEFINITELY let me know what you think of these new shorter episodes, my empty nest friend. 

Don’t you dare forget that You Are Amazing!

Talk tomorrow!

00:03:55

[blooper]

[end music]

136: The Daily Experiment – When You Worry About Re-Grieving a Lost Child 💚

136: The Daily Experiment - When You Worry About Re-Grieving a Lost Child 💚

Hello, my amazing friend!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"Emotions may arise and that’s okay - you’re strong enough to get through them. Then you’ll begin to take inventory on the thoughts - I call those thoughts your thought-deliveries. And for each one you’re going to ask yourself: “Is it true?”  “Do I love this thought (or do I even like it)?” Consider if there is a way to adjust the thought in a way that allows you to show up better for yourself and the world now?"

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Check out @emptynestcoach 's episode When you worry about grieving a lost child:

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This Episode is Brought To You By

Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers

  • 00:40 Quick Reminders
  • 01:42 Ask Coach Christine: Re-Grieving a Child

💚Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

* affiliate link to SupaPass - which powers our community - coming soon! Should you purchase using the link, I make a commission. 

Subscribe To This Podcast

It is FREE!

Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 136

FULL TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00

Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #136.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve used in prior episodes - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian. You’ll do this by leveling-up 

[level-up music]

your life in small increments - those small wins add up to big changes.

I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode today. Here we go…

00:00:40

Quick reminders: I’m in the midst of super short daily episodes to combat a busy time in my life. For the details on that check out episode #135. You’ll find the answer to all of your questions, where I’ve been and more on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com. I love feedback on the episodes and if you enjoy this, don’t forget to subscribe or follow in your favorite podcast player. SupaPass who powers our online community - that’s coming soon - is our fabulous episode sponsor. 

00:01:08

[computer game level up music (short)] 

Ask Coach Christine

I received this sobering question in my TikTok DMs. Tameria did give me permission to share her name, her question (although I did generalize it a bit), and my response to her. Here was Tameria’s initial question to me:

I’m listening to your podcast and enjoying it! I have a situation that I was wondering if you have dealt with. My first child died at a young age (cancer). My other child is a junior and I feel anxiety that I will re-grieve my first child while adjusting to the empty nest. Have you discussed bereaved parents on your podcast? 

00:01:42

My response? 

Thank you for reaching out Tameria. I have not covered this on my podcast thus far but you are the third person to ask me about this in the last couple of months so let me say a few words about it. 

First of all, I don’t have words to express how sorry I am for your loss. Whether it was two weeks ago or twenty years ago. I can’t imagine anything more painful than losing a child. I personally have not experienced this myself, so I can only offer what I do when coaching any happening in our life - it is first to know you are strong enough to feel your emotions when they pop-in, and also know that you’ll get to the other side of them.

Use those top of your C.E.O. toolbox items when the emotions begin to feel overwhelming: the hobbies that make you happy, the self-care routines that allow you to escape a bit - whatever those are for you. You can try adding “and that’s okay” to the end of statements you make in your mind - for example: “I miss my child... and that’s okay.” “I wish my child would have been able to experience this... and that’s okay I feel that way.” 

Try those until you are in a place where you can do a little bit more thought-work. When you do feel you are ready for the next step, take out a piece of paper and write down all of the thoughts you are thinking. Give yourself a five minute timer if it helps. 

Emotions may arise and that’s okay - you’re strong enough to get through them.

Then you’ll begin to take inventory on the thoughts - I call those thoughts your thought-deliveries. And for each one you’re going to ask yourself: 

“Is it true?”

“Do I love this thought (or do I even like it)?”

Consider if there is a way to adjust the thought in a way that allows you to show up better for yourself and the world now? 

One warning: be cautious of the “should have” statements that tend to pop-up as those are usually indicators that you aren’t accepting a truth about where you are now. 

For example: “My child should have been able to experience this.” Honestly, yes, they absolutely should have. I won’t argue that for a moment. However, if you continually focus on thoughts like these and spin on them, you don’t get to move into then thoughts like, “My child would have loved this, and I will enjoy it for them” - those types of thoughts.

I realize, also, I am saying this as if it’s easy. 

None of this work is easy -  even without adding a child’s early passing into the mix, so please give yourself grace, patience and kindness as you mourn, or when re-mourning moments pop-up. It’s okay when they do. You’ve got this.

Also remember that when you keep thought-deliveries in your mind about  how you might feel in the future, when your other child heads to college, in a way you are already living in it as if it’s already true. And with that, find things that help you to be present in your life now.

Continue to give yourself grace as you check your thoughts, and bump up those self-care things you love when things get really rough. It’s okay.

Should this topic be something you have on your mind, I’d be honored to work with you.

Thank you for your question and the permission to share it Tameria. You definitely aren’t alone and I am looking forward to an exciting future for you. Your child who passed would want that for you, too!

Now, my listener, ff you have a question you want me to focus on in an upcoming episode, use that google voice number 1-920-LIFEWIN. You may also do what Tameria did and DM me. I do consider all submissions.

And with that - I’ll be back tomorrow with a mother’s day message.

Be sure to check your feed every day for the next week or so, and DEFINITELY let me know what you think of these shorter episodes, my empty nest friend. 

And don’t you dare forget that You Are Amazing!

Talk tomorrow!

[end music]

135: The Daily Experiment Your Empty Nest Coach Style: My Wish For You Today & New Things 💚

135: The Daily Experiment, Your Empty Nest Coach Style: My Wish For You Today & New Things 💚

Hello, my amazing friend!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"My amazing friend, my wish for you today is that you are able to take time for you for something that you’ve been putting off. Whether it is a hair appointment, a doctor appointment or a walk in the park, may you easily be able to schedule that time for yourself today and may it give you energy to do another thing or two that you haven’t been making the time for. Those little things feel good, don’t they?"

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Check out @emptynestcoach 's episode of the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast (the daily experiment):

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This Episode is Brought To You By

Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers

  • 00:52 Coach Christine Calls Sally for Help
  • 02:13 This is the Situation
  • 04:28 My Wish For You Today
  • 04:56 New Things: We Moved & Coaching Availability

Episode Question for You To Consider

  1. How do you feel about my daily podcast episode experiment? 

💚Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

* affiliate link to SupaPass - which powers our community - coming soon! Should you purchase using the link, I make a commission. 

Subscribe To This Podcast

It is FREE!

Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 135

FULL TRANSCRIPT


00:00:00

Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #135.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve used in prior episodes - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian. You’ll do this by leveling-up 

[level-up music]

your life in small increments - those small wins add up to big changes.

I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode today. Here we go…

[happy music under voiceover]

This podcast is my gift to you: a parent adjusting to the idea of an empty nest -

00:00:52

[Vinyl Record Scratch]

Your exhausted from your move hotline, this is Sally, how may I help you?

Hi, Sally, this is Coach Christine. It’s Friday morning and I don’t have my episode edited for the day. I only have a couple of hours to pull this off and it isn’t enough time, what should I do? 

I see… you know we always start here with “take a deep breath.” 

[keys click] 

Can you skip the episode? 

Well, I could, absolutely, but I already moved my episodes to every other week, and while I do have a lot going on in my life right now, not releasing anything is tough.

Hmmm… 

[keys click] 

You could try releasing a super short episode. Maybe you can break the episode you have into smaller bits and release it over the next few weeks…

That’s a great idea. I’ll release short ones daily and see how that goes. 

I didn’t say daily...that’s your idea.

I know. I’m a stubborn overachiever. My listeners already know this, and I have no idea what that will look like but I’m gonna give it a try. Hmm.. that does mean I need to get back in my podvan studio to record things again but I am curious about this because, while I did daily episodes back in 2020, those were full episodes. That was a bit much. This COULD work. 

Thanks Sally!

Would you like me to file a report? 

No thanks, I’m all good. 

00:02:13

[level-up music]

My listener, so, here’s the situation, I have a full script. I’ve recorded it but haven’t edited it, and I was incredibly tired so what should have been a 22-minute recording session turned into 45-minutes that I need to edit through. I definitely can’t pull that off today but I can pull off a five-minute or less episode and it might be fun to try this for a week (or so) - see how it goes.

I’m going to use this episode as our starting point, so if you are new here… I guess I should play my full intro. If you’re not new here, go ahead and fast forward through this. Oh, and today is Friday, May 7th, 2021. Here we go!

[happy music under voiceover]

This podcast is my gift to you: a parent adjusting to the idea of an empty nest - or possibly a student who's wondering how your parents are feeling about you heading out on your own. These podcast episodes will have a base of life coaching infused with reminders to cheer yourself on and maybe with a dash of my alter ego, Sally (the hotline video operator), popping in from time to time. I’m here to remind you that you should be your own biggest fan!

[end happy music]

00:03:19

Quick reminders: you’ll find the answer to all of your questions, where I’ve been and more on my website: YourEmptyNestCoach.com. I love feedback on the episodes and if you enjoy this, don’t forget to subscribe in your favorite podcast player. SupaPass who powers our online community - that’s coming soon - is our fab episode sponsor. 

00:03:40

My amazing friend, how well are you managing your thought-deliveries? Are you especially watching those that are about you? You know the ones… I can’t do this, I’m too old, I can’t let go of this thing, well, I’m not capable of what she is capable of. Yeah, those thought-deliveries - the ones about you - these are the ones we want to pay the most attention to because these have the power to shut everything else you are working on down. You may decide some are worth keeping and others - they’re not needed at all. Be sure to take inventory periodically. Sometimes we need to do those minute by minute. Those thought-deliveries that aren’t needed,  let them go - either return them to sender or let them pass you by.  

00:04:28

[computer game level up music (short)] 

My Wish for You Today ✅

My amazing friend, my wish for you today is that you are able to take time for you for something that you’ve been putting off. Whether it is a hair appointment, a doctor appointment or a walk in the park, may you easily be able to schedule that time for yourself today and may it give you energy to do maybe another thing or two that you haven’t been making the time for. Those little things feel good, don’t they?

00:04:56

[computer game level up music (short)] 

New Things. New Things. New Things!

Well, we’ve moved! As this was not our first move, everything went fairly smoothly, and no major surprises popped up. Although, I’m well aware, I may need to back off on the social promotion of this episode, so I can catch up on some sleep and feel a bit more settled in my new routine. The good news is I’m enjoying this journey even at 4:20 am with little sleep and packing up my laptop to record in my podvan. Right now, I’m incredibly thankful that I set up my van to do this. I just posted on my new Instagram account specifically for the podvan: it’s called podvan adventures. I figured some of you aren’t really interested in that but for those of you who are, there’s an account for it.

The reason I’m so thankful is that there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that recording in our new residence would be difficult at best. 

And of course, in other new-things news - or as a reminder - there are my private coaching spots. I have two spots remaining in May. If you are a regular listener, you already know that in the Your Empty Nest Coach part of my life, my private coaching clients are top tier - they’re my absolute favorites. We have weekly private zoom calls, I send you resources, and you have a line of communication with me between sessions. It’s so much fun, and I’d love to work with you! 

And with that - I’ll be back tomorrow with a bit of tough subject - a listener, Tameria, asked about re-grieving a child she lost to cancer. I’ll share what I told her in tomorrow’s episode. 

Be sure to check your feed every day for the next week or so, and DEFINITELY let me know what you think of these new shorter episodes, my empty nest friend. 

And remember that You Are Amazing!

Talk tomorrow!

[end music]

134: Why the Destination Matters More Than the Path (Why We Are Moving), Your Wins & More 💚

134: Why the Destination Matters More Than the Path (Why We Are Moving), Your Wins & More 💚

Hello, my amazing friend!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"The most important thing to remember is that your college student - if they actually made it to campus - has changed. It could be a big or small change, but they are not the same student who left last time, and they are definitely not the same child that lived in your house at age 10, 12, 14, etc., so your now emerging adult deserves to have the opportunity to show who they are now."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Check out @emptynestcoach 's episode of the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast (why the destination matters more than the path):

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This Episode is Brought To You By

Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers

  • 01:12  Skip Intro
  • 02:16 My Wish For You Today
  • 02:38 New Things: Move, Grad School, and Empty Nest Success App Update
  • 03:56 Ask Coach Christine: How Should I Prepare for My Student Returning Home for Summer (College) Breaks?
  • 05:29 My Lessons Learned: Know Where You Are Going but Be Open to What Your Journey Looks Like to Get There (Why We Are Moving)
  • 07:11 College Loans
  • 08:11 Paying off the Loans & Why We Pay for Our Daughter's College
  • 11:19 Christine, Where Are You? 
  • 11:54 Celebrating You & Your Wins!
  • 15:21 What's in Your Life's Toolbox?
  • 17:30 Let's Find the Funny
  • 17:48 What I Wish My Parents Knew: College Break Exhaustion
  • 18:28 Two Questions for You
  • 19:23 Bloopers
  • 19:43 Still Listening? 

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. How many times have you moved in your life?
  2. What is the destination that you have your sights on for your life?

💚Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

* affiliate link to SupaPass - which powers our community - coming soon! Should you purchase using the link, I make a commission. 

Subscribe To This Podcast

It is FREE!

Want to get notified of new episodes directly on your phone? Subscribe to this podcast using your favorite app!

The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 134

FULL TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00

Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #134.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve introduced in prior episodes - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian.

In this episode, I talk about the why for my family’s upcoming move, we talk about how to prepare for college breaks, and of course, we are celebrating our wins and more!

I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode, today.  Here we go.

[happy music under voiceover]

This podcast is my gift to you: a parent adjusting to the idea of an empty nest - or possibly a student who's wondering how your parents are feeling about you heading out on your own. These podcast episodes will have a base of life coaching infused with reminders to cheer yourself on and maybe with a dash of my alter ego, Sally (the hotline video operator), popping in from time to time. I’m here to remind you that you should be your own biggest fan!

[end happy music]

00:01:14 

My amazing friend, did you get a chance to listen to my last episode where I interviewed a client of mine? I can’t thank Jennifer enough for the time she made to share with us.  

As a reminder, you may submit feedback, questions or comments to any section of these episodes by leaving me a message (text or audio) - on my google voice number: That’s 1-920-LIFEWIN or (920-543-3946).  Of course, you’ll find that in my show notes, too, if you’re looking for it later.

All of my offerings, podcast show notes, transcriptions of the episodes, and more can be found on my website: Your Empty Nest Coach dot com. 

00:01:56

[computer game level up music (short)] 

I’m thrilled to share with you that this podcast episode is sponsored by SupaPass. SupaPass enables creatives to have a slick Netflix-style platform with a modern & easy-to-use feel, making it easy to browse resources. SupaPass powers our Empty Nest Success online community which is coming soon! A special thanks to SupaPass for providing a space for our empty nest flock to fly to!

00:02:18

[computer game level up music (short)] 

My Wish for You Today ✅

My amazing friend, my wish for you today is that you are present enough in your day today to notice something you wouldn’t have otherwise. Whether it be someone hurting that you can offer assistance to, an opportunity for you, or anything in between. May your mind be clear, and may your eyes and ears be open to it. 

00:02:40

[computer game level up music (short)] 

New Things. New Things. New Things!

First up, our move: I’m going to talk a little bit about this a bit today - tell you a little more about our why, also, but the status is that two weeks from today is our moving weekend. Our house sold in three days and it has been a whirlwind. 

Our daughter, as of today, isn’t attending grad school. Yes, she got into her dream programs but in the end the financials didn’t make sense for her - at least for this year, so she’s coming home for a bit - and our nest won’t be so empty again. Hubby and I are going to enjoy having her home for as long as she’s with us.

As for the empty nest success app is slow going with the move but I hope to have a portion of it available within the next two weeks for some of my flock members to begin testing it. If you’ve already reached out to me please know that I’ll be in touch soon. If you’re interested in testing it out, let me know  - email me or DM me!

And of course, there’s private coaching spots. I have two spots remaining in May. If you are a regular listener, you already know that in the Your Empty Nest Coach part of my life, my private coaching clients are top tier - they’re my absolute favorites. We have weekly private zoom calls, I send you resources, and you have a line of communication with me between sessions. It’s so much fun, and I’d love to work with you! 

00:03:59

[computer game level up music (short)] 

Ask Coach Christine

One of the ideas I have about this segment is to turn it into more than just a segment of a podcast episode. I would love to get enough questions that I can answer them Monday through Friday and share a win with them. So, don’t be shy if you have a question for me to answer. 

For today, a recent question I received is, “Christine, how should I prepare for having my college student back home?”

And my response? 

I love this question so much because it really is important to think about ahead of time. The most important thing to remember is that your college student, if they actually made it to campus, has changed. It could be a big or small change but they are not the same student who left last time, and they are definitely not the same child that lived in your house at age 10, 12, 14, etc., so your now emerging adult deserves to have the opportunity to show who they are now. Let’s be real, you might have changed since they left and you might want them to know who you are. So, my top tip is to recognize that they’ll be different and take the opportunity to get to know the child (of any age) who's walking through your door and also remember that it is time for the relationship to mature. 

I have a four-part series on this on Instagram and Tiktok, if you want to check it out. 

If you have a question you want me to focus on in an upcoming episode, use that google voice number 1-920-LIFEWIN. Leave a voicemail message or text your question to me. I do consider all submissions.

00:0529

[computer game level up music (short)] 

My Lessons Learned 

What have I learned recently? 

Know where you are heading but don’t be set on how you are going to get there. I have talked about this in prior episodes and I talk about it in coaching - my spider web episode mentions it a bit but I’ve had it play out in my life recently and there was this incredible moment where I realized what happened - and this is where I share a bit about why we are moving. 

I’m about to be super transparent with you, and I did get the okay from my hubby to share this at a high-level. He’s extremely private (not on social media) so I like to ask ahead of time before I share things like this. 

We bought a large home a little over three years ago. We had been renting for years after owning a home but one of us really missed home ownership - wanted a bit more privacy and space. The house has been incredible with the pandemic - I mean we have been privileged enough to each have our own office space while working from home. I wasn’t sold on home ownership, to be honest. While there are things I like - the extra space and being able to do whatever we want in the house (are two) - the maintenance of home ownership and the work that comes along with it - well, I haven’t been a fan. I’d much rather create videos and content for you than clean a larger house, or take care of the house. 

When I came home one day last month and my husband said, “I think we should move.” I’ll be honest, I could not call the realtor fast enough. Then when he shared about how much homes are selling for where we live and pointed out that we’d be able to pay off our daughter’s college loans, well, it became a no-brainer for both of us. Those loans are no small potatoes. 

I promise I’m getting to the point of this lesson. Stay with me. 

00:07:13

To explain the college loans, we aren’t a family who had money saved for our daughter’s education. I know, I know - go ahead and gasp! I’ll wait. Our plan was that I’d work when she was in high school and we’d use that money for her college - well, she went four years early, so the solution for us, was, yeah, the government loans that she could take and the parent loans for the rest of it. She did get a great merit scholarship, but let's be real, it’s not like that leaves you with only $500 to pay for the year - gosh - wouldn’t that be nice? 

Here we are, now, with our daughter graduating in May, and guess what we need to start making payments on? Yes, four years of loans, loans and more loans. 

Feel free to judge, critique or what not. That is for you to do and it is all, honestly, outside of my fence, so your thoughts about what we did are for you to reflect on - not me. I share our experience because I know we aren’t the only ones in this situation and I want you to know I understand if this is you, too. 

00:08:11

Jumping back to selling our home and guess what we can do? Yes, pay off all of the loans! All. The. Loans. Rather than us live in this big house with college loans, we are moving to a rental where we get to live cheaper, and have a maintenance free lifestyle with no debt.

I understand this isn’t a choice everyone would make but it is the one we’ve made and it feels amazing. Does every parent have this ability? No, I know this. I know there are college students who aren’t able to get any assistance from their parents, and I know we are privileged. My husband did not graduate from college. I did. He had to pay for his college and tapped out very quickly. He’s always said the gift he wanted to give our daughter is a college degree paid for (she still obviously had to do the work - which she did). And here we are. 

You may be wondering… what does this have to do with where you’re heading Christine? Well, as most of you know, I have a day job and I have this business. I love this business but I’m not in a position where I’ll leave my day job to do this full-time until two things happen. Want to know what the two things are? 

1. Our daughter’s college is paid for

2. I make enough in my coaching to pay for all of the expenses with the business and make more than I currently make in my day job. 

Here is the interesting thing: over the last few years, I had assumed that paying off my daughter’s college was going to be through my coaching. I had never considered that we’d have this opportunity to sell our home in this market bubble, and that my husband who loves this house was going to be excited to head back to renting life. But here we are. It has fallen into place perfectly as if it was always meant to be this way and had to happen this way.

Does this mean I get to leave my day job? Oh, no. Not even close. I’m not one of those people that think,

[character voice]

 “I have to leave my day job to prove to myself that I believe in me. I mean,” sigh, “who am I if I can’t leave my day job and believe I can make enough money.” 

[return to normal speaking]

No, that’s not me. I get it but those are someone else’s thoughts about my business. I am a human who has real bills to pay, we have retirement to build up more and if I leave my day job, that puts a stress on not only our family but on my coaching that I don’t want there. I LOVE coaching. I LOVE it. I love it enough to be patient as my business grows. I love it enough to have single digit clients per year for five, seven, ten years - if that’s what’s in store for me. I’m all good. I am here, as Coach Christine, to have fun and to serve. Anything else is a drag and I don’t need that from the project I have that I created to bring joy and adventure into my life and into my client’s life.

So, I’ve learned in this experience that knowing how you’ll get to a destination is not important as being true to yourself, being open to anything along the way and remembering what your destination is so you don’t miss it when it is gifted to you out of nowhere. 

00:011:21

[quirky music under segment]

Christine? Christine? Christine where are you? 

Deirdre Dolan Nesline and I are continuing our Friday morning Clubhouse declutter tips. Deirdre provides great tips for your weekend ahead, and with my move happening, this is perfect timing!

If you are in Clubhouse, I invite you to follow me and Deirdre there.

As always, you may check out my Media & Press page on my website YourEmptyNestCoach.com for a list of all of my guest appearances. 

00:11:54

[computer game level up music (short)]  

Celebrating You and Your Wins[sound] 

My win? I got rid of journals that I have been moving from home to home and have never looked at. As I was going through things and preparing to box up items, I turned on The Minimalists podcast and they reminded me that I don’t need to save them. Those things might be important to you but working on being super present in my life means that I, personally, don’t need to look back at years and years of my thoughts because I have new ones now, and I like the growth I’ve made. 

As for your wins, I’m happy to share the last two weeks of wins from TikTok and Instagram! See my show notes to click through to view these wins and cheer everyone on. As always, please forgive any mispronunciations:

Lesa of NotYourCollegeLife shared, “Content planning done for the next two months!”

Jen of FlourishingOver50 shared, “just finished a 12 week course and made it through all of the content, recordings, homework”

Jane of AmbitiousMamas shared, “Sometimes just the fact that I can smile. This empty nest thing 😢.”

Jane, I want to stop here and just remind you that you don’t have to smile at every moment. Please feel those emotions. It is okay to be sad sometimes. You are strong enough to get through them, to feel them and get to the other side of them. I believe in you.

Alright, back to our next one..

JillGrimesMD shared,”Love the pod van! My Wednesday win was fighting through a new version of photoshop (new to me cuz I hadn’t used it in several years) to create a new header for my website 🙌 🎤

Go, Jill! 

Alright, I’m going to take a break:

Lesa, well done on your content planning.

Jen, awesome on the course, and content, and recordings, and homework. I know how much work that is. It’s a big deal. Please give yourself a pat on the back!

Jane, you’re going to feel those feelings and I’m cheering you on.

Jill, I can’t wait to check out this new header!

00:13:51

Now let’s hear from the TikTok family:

Gigi M. Green says “ My win is writing the first season of my soon to be released audio drama.“

Go, Gigi. Woo!

Layla “I recently found out that my school will be able to have a safe, COVID-friendly prom and graduation this year!”

Oh my goodness. This is so exciting. I love it.

Vik shared, “I made up with my mom and I finally cleaned my room!” 

Huge. Love it!

Rain shared, “I went to bed at a good time and got all my work done without procrastinating.”

Awesome!

Noreen “I was able to get my first dose of the COVID vaccine!”

I love it, Noreen. I got mine too and I’m waiting on my second one. This is great. I hope you’re feeling okay.

Sunnyday shared, “Even though I was worried about homework, I went to the beach with a friend.”

Well done. And I checked in with Sunnyday and they said it was beautiful.

Thank you all for sharing your wins. Now my listener, I want you to take a couple of seconds here and think of a moment that happened today: small - or big, that you can celebrate. Do you have it? Now take a moment to share it on social media. Tag me and I’ll be thrilled to pop over and cheer you on! If you aren’t on the socials then share it with one other person via email. You have no idea how much your wins encourage and inspire others - no win is too small!

As a reminder, you can always share your win with us - and you may send it to me in my DMs on social media, use my google voice number, yes, that’s in my show notes, or pop in the comments of my wednesday win videos on TikTok or Instagram: just add the microphone emoji.

00:15:21

[computer game level up music (short)] 

What’s in your life’s toolbox? 

As a reminder, these are the things that bring you joy, or allow you to reset yourself in one way or another. Some are escapes that allow you the grace to have time until you’re able to process deeper or to allow your mind a bit of time to recalculate to what’s next; other things are tools and resources that allow you to do the deeper work - like this podcast, my workshops, or doing coaching work with me or someone else. I’d love for you to share what works for you in your life’s toolbox for others to consider. Remember, these are always suggestions. What works for me may not work for you and vice versa - don’t be afraid to try new things!

What I have to share with you this week was that I was gifted with a n.o.w.® tone therapy system. A sweet podcasting friend, Lee Uehara, won it at Podfest Global Summit and was incredibly generous to gift this to me. What is it? Well, their website describes it as “It’s Yoga for Your Mind.” I love it! It helps me to reset and recharge in just three minutes. Let me give you a little listen….  

It comes with two and I’m going to turn them both on.

[sounds of n.o.w.® tone therapy ]

One of the statements on their website is “helps you live in the present moment, more easily.” 

I’m all about presence, so this is speaking my language. It does a great job for me, too. I feel like it takes me to where I am when I am walking through the woods alone and able to be truly present in the moment. I’m a fan. I did take video of opening it and using it, and will post it on YouTube as soon as I am able! 

00:17:30

[computer game level up music (short)] 

Let’s find the funny!

[giggles from others] 

I’m putting a link to a TikTok video in my show notes. It is an adorable cat thinking they are going to sneak attack on another one and that catchy Oh, no, oh, no, no. Yeah, that’s really sad. [giggles] You know what I mean. That sound. That’s with it and it made me giggle out loud. 

00:17:49

[computer game level up music (short)] 

What I Wish My  Parents Knew

Related to College Breaks..

Your children want you to know that they’re going to be exhausted when they return home and ask that you have patience and grace with them with your expectations - especially immediate after their arrival. It is a lot for them, and they often may disappear into their room to sleep and sleep and sleep. Definitely make sure they’re in a good mental state but also don’t be shocked if they want to sleep more than you’ve seen them do so before - especially with the pandemic - navigating campus during a pandemic is no joke. Enjoy your time with them, be patient and have fun!

00:18:28

[happy music (short)] 

Two Questions for You

Question 1: How many times have you moved in your life? 

and Question 2: What is the destination that you have your sights on for your life? 

As always, I provide content to make you think, my empty nest friend.

My HOPE is that I’m able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life.

If you enjoy this podcast please don’t forget to share it with others, it’s the best way to allow it to reach a wider audience. And of course, follow or subscribe in your favorite podcast app!

I’ll be back with episode 135 in two weeks. In the meantime, you have 133 other episodes, from me, to catch up on, or relisten to. 

And we are now at that part of the episode where I sign off after reminding you that you, my beautiful friend, are amazing!

See ya!

0019:23

[bloopers]

00:19:43

Still listening? 

Yes, I’m recording this in my podvan again. I’m very curious to see if the sound quality is just as good as my last episode - it sounded like a studio. It’s much better than my home. I’m debating on creating podvan accounts on Instagram and TikTok because I think I could have fun with sharing videos there. What do ya think? 

[end music]

133: What it is Like to Work with Coach Christine: A Client Interview & More 💚

133: What it is Like to Work with Coach Christine: A Client Interview & More 💚

Hello, my amazing friend!

Coach Christine,

Your Empty Nest Coach

"I think the surprise benefit for me was that working with you didn’t only help me with my daughter’s situation - the empty nest. The way that you’ve taught me to - and worked with me to get better at choosing the thoughts that I want to think and gaining more energy - it spilled over into other areas of my life."

Take a listen or read the full transcript at the bottom of this post.

⇓⇓⇓ More goodies below, too! Scroll down ⇓, so you don't miss anything! ⇓⇓⇓

Check out @emptynestcoach 's episode of the Your Empty Nest Coach podcast (what it is like to work with Coach Christine: a client interview):

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This Episode is Brought To You By

Episode Topics & Their Minute Markers

  • 01:11  Skip Intro
  • 02:26 My Wish For You Today
  • 02:46 Start of Interview with Jennifer
  • 04:07 How Jennifer Found Me
  • 06:06 Jennifer's Hesitations About Working With Me
  • 07:21 What Jennifer Enjoyed the Most
  • 08:08 Figuring Out How to Be Okay With Her Daughter's Tattoos
  • 10:57 My Daughter's First Apartment
  • 11:43 Worrisome Thoughts
  • 12:13 Jennifer Shares Surprise Benefits to Working With Me
  • 14:32 What is the most evil thing you will do to a client? 😮
  • 14:56 How Often Would Christine Talk to Me? What does Coach Christine's Accountability Look Like: Calls, Texts, Etc.
  • 16:00 I'm a Busy Mom. How Do I Find Time for Coaching?
  • 17:47 Can I Move in With You? 
  • 18:37 Why This Work Provides Us With More Energy
  • 19:48 Jennifer Answers the Question, "Waffles or Pancakes?"
  • 20:13  Jennifer Answers the Question, "What is One Item You Couldn't Live Without And Why?"
  • 20:55  Jennifer Answers the Question, "All-Time Favorite Movie?"
  • 21:31  Jennifer Answers the Question, "You Have One Hour of Alone Time. No One's Gonna Bother You. What's Your Go-To Thing To Do?"
  • 22:26 New Things: Not So Empty Nest & April 2021 Coaching Availability!
  • 23:42 Celebrating You & Your Wins!
  • 25:41 Two Questions for You
  • 26:43 Bloopers
  • 27:00 Still Listening? 

Episode Questions for You To Consider

  1. Do you relate to anything Jennifer shared today?
  2. What thought-delivery in your mind do you need to sort or clear out?

💚Send audio feedback to Coach Christine now: voicemail/text to 920-LIFEWIN (920-543-3946).

First Time Here? Try This Order of Episodes

Episode Resources

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The Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, Episode 133

FULL TRANSCRIPT

00:00:00

Christine: Hi, I’m Coach Christine. This is my podcast, it’s the Your Empty Nest Coach Podcast, and we’re on episode #133.  If you are new here, know that I tend to use terms I’ve introduced in prior episodes - and this episode is no exception - should you feel a bit lost when this happens, I invite you to use my show notes for a list of earlier episodes to get caught up! High-level, I’m all about coaching you to become the CEO of Your Life and in my world, CEO stands for Conscious Effective Olympian.

In this episode, I interview a client of mine about her experience working with me, we’ll celebrate your wins, and a little bit more. 

I appreciate that you pressed play on this episode, today.  Here we go.

[happy music under voiceover]

This podcast is my gift to you: a parent adjusting to the idea of an empty nest - or possibly a student who's wondering how your parents are feeling about you heading out on your own. These podcast episodes will have a base of life coaching infused with reminders to cheer yourself on and maybe with a dash of my alter ego, Sally (the hotline video operator), popping in from time to time. I’m here to remind you that you should be your own biggest fan!

[end happy music]

00:01:11 

My amazing friend, in my last episode I talked about how imposter syndrome has a way of popping into your life in new areas once you conquer it in others, and interviewing a client of mine about what it’s like to work with me had my protector wanting to take over again - yes, there were some super speed intense thought-deliveries that I needed to manage. Look, I never pretend to have it all together: I share lessons as I learn, as I experience them! The good news is it didn’t stop me from asking, scheduling, recording and now editing this episode. The positive is that if I do this again - the leveling up that I did in this episode will make next time easier - on my thought-deliveries.  How are you leveling up in your life? 

As always, you may submit feedback, questions or comments to any section of these episodes by leaving me a message (text or audio) - on my google voice number: That’s 1-920-LIFEWIN or (920-543-3946).  Of course, you’ll find that in my show notes, too, if you’re looking for it later.

All of my offerings, podcast show notes, transcriptions of the episodes, and more can be found on my website: Your Empty Nest Coach dot com. 

00:02:26

[computer game level up music (short)] 

My Wish for You Today ✅

My amazing friend, my wish for you today is that you step into your life boldly. Your life. Not the life you were told to live by others but the life that you were put on this planet to live, the one where you are the leading character. 

00:02:46

Interview Start

[computer game level up music (short)] 

Christine: Today we get to spend some time with an amazing client of mine, Jennifer.  

Jennifer: Oh, it’s super exciting to be here, thank you.

Christine: Coaching brings up personal topics, so we’ll be using Jennifer’s first name only for this interview, as she requested. As with all of my private coaching clients, I’m truly honored to work with Jennifer. It has been exciting to be her coach: getting to know this incredibly intelligent, brave, and amazing woman. I’m beyond excited for what is ahead for her, and her family. Words cannot express my appreciation that she took the time to do this interview for both me - and for you to have a peek to see what it is like to work with me.

Jennifer: Well, first I have to thank you because this has really been invaluable to me. I think when we met I was in a much darker place, maybe, or less optimistic place, at least, and so I really appreciate the work that you do and think it’s fantastic. So, it’s great to be here.

Christine: My listener, right now is where my protector was throwing in those imposter syndrome thought-deliveries.  I had no idea what to expect out of this interview and where it was going to go. 

Thank you so much. 

I had never spoken with Jennifer about how she found me because she was one of those clients that purchased with no prior conversations with me, I asked her about this.

00:04:07

Do you remember how you found me?

Jennifer: Well, I’m a big podcast listener. I listen to a lot of political podcasts and history podcasts. And, you know, it was Christmas and my daughter had been home for a couple of weeks - and she was gonna be with us for a couple more weeks - she goes to school - she’s a junior in college. And my younger daughter is a junior in high school and so I was already starting to feel, you know, an overwhelming sadness that she was going to be going back. And just really, a kind of deep sense of loss about that. To the point that I wasn’t even able to enjoy the time with her because I was already dreading her going back to college.

I simply went on Spotify, and I thought, “you know, I need some advice on this empty nest business.” My sisters have gone through it but - and I talked to them - but they went through it a long time ago. I’m the youngest of six kids. I so felt like I needed somebody to place the feelings that I was having into context and help me through this phase. And so, I simply typed in “empty nest” on Spotify and you popped up. So, it was pretty random. And then I listened to several of your podcasts - not all of one hundred and thirty-some that you have now, but several of them, and I thought, “boy, you know, she seems really great.” I believe I might have signed up on your website for a newsletter - or updates, or something - and then when I found out you were doing private coaching, and I thought, “well, I’m not the wealthiest person but this sounds like a good investment, and this is what I need right now. I need to do this for myself. I just need to work through these feelings. I didn’t need deep dark psychotherapy you know, because you should go to a counselor for that- “ [giggles]

Christine: Yes, please.  

Jennifer: I needed somebody to work through the feelings I was having. So you popped up and you sounded great on your podcast, you made sense to me. I didn’t know all of the lingo at the time, I know more of the lingo now. But that is essentially how I found you.

Christine: I remember you booked, and I was like, “I don’t think I’ve ever talked to her before.”

Jennifer: Nope.

Christine: Who is this? [giggles]

Jennifer: Sort of did it on a whim. Sometimes I do those things on a whim. 

00:06:06

Christine: It was wonderful. I’m so glad you did. So, did you have any hesitations or concerns when you signed up and if you did what was your biggest one?

Jennifer: I was wondering how comfortable it would be to share some of the things I was thinking with someone you didn’t know at first - how much you should open up to someone in that space. Kind of like that balance but you made me feel really comfortable - pretty much off the bat. And, yeah, so I did have some hesitation but I always thought, “Well, you know, I can just not continue if it’s not going well but actually it turned out really well and became more and more comfortable even with every session.”

I think that was my biggest hesitation.

Christine: And you feel like it wasn’t a problem? 

Jennifer: Oh, no, not at all. I mean, after the first five to ten minutes. 

Christine: Oh, wow, that’s quick. Yay!

Jennifer: Oh, yeah, no, it was during the first session for sure. But you always never know what to expect when you sign up to something.

Christine: Absolutely. Well, what’s interesting is that as a coach, I always feel the same way too. Because - 

Jennifer: Oh sure.

Christine: You don’t know. And I would never want to work with someone who wasn’t comfortable anyway, so it is wonderful. That is kind of the benefit of the podcast is I figure if you’ve listened to three, or four or five and you get me - we’ll be okay. 

00:07:21

Thinking about coaching with me, do you - is there any part of it that you enjoyed more than anything else in the experience?

Jennifer: I really like the models that you use. I’m a big fan of visuals and analogies. So putting these important concepts - and the way that you’re able to put them in analogies like your protector, and the boxes of thoughts - I thought that was really valuable. 

It is a deep concept. It’s such a deep concept but the way that you’re able to communicate that, I think was really useful to me. So, I love the models but what I loved about the private coaching is that you can take things that are happening to you right now, and you help us run them through the models in a very personalized way.

00:08:08

So, things that we’ve talked about are my daughter’s tattoos, for example. I don’t mind sharing that with you. 

Christine: That’s a great story. I love that one.

Jennifer: Which I very quickly got over by working through the CTFAR model with you. And so that was a lot of fun. And now that I’ve evolved to kind of the CEO model, I can see how I’m able to work more quickly through those things myself but I still like to run some things by you because some things - and we’ve talked about a few things that don’t exactly fit the model sometimes.

Christine: Yes.

Jennifer: That you think don’t fit it. That you’ve helped me sort of see how it can fit and how you can re envision the situation in a more positive light to be more supportive to your child. And I think I have been more supportive to my child since we’ve started working together. I don’t get on her case as much about - you know - I was never a huge nag - I was always pretty positive and supportive but I always worried about her future and thinking about what she’s gonna to do next, and always kind of  - I’m a college advisor - or professor - I don’t mind saying that  - so, I know a lot about college and giving students advice and I think I was treating my daughter like one of my advisees. You know, peppering her with questions all the time, worrying about whether she was taking advantage of college and whether she was going to do X,Y, or Z. And I think you’ve helped me be more calm and have more faith in her and myself to sort of, let it happen, and let her be herself in working through that.

I think that was a pretty big breakthrough for me, one of the breakthroughs that we’ve had, including her tattoos which was a small part of that. [giggles]

Christine: Yeah, do you remember, I would love to tell - if you don’t mind sharing, what did I challenge you to do with the tattoos? Do you remember? 

Jennifer: Was it to envision that she was covered with all of them? I can’t remember.

Christine: Yeah.

Jennifer: I think that was one of the things you suggested to me, like “So, what?” You know, what’s gonna happen? You know, really nothing.

[giggles]

And then I kept taking it further: well, she’s gonna have to get them removed some day, she might not like them some day and X, Y, and Z is gonna happen. But to envision it and to be like, well, maybe she’ll get it done and it’ll be beautiful. You know, and it’s her own body.

Christine: Yeah.

Jennifer: And so, that was one of the more, I think, comical, and kind of fun things to work through. But there have been other ones, too, that have been really helpful too. 

Christine: Well, I’m glad you can call it comical now. Because 

Jennifer: Yeah, yeah. 

Christine: it was not comical when you first came - 

Jennifer: No it wasn’t. I was worried she wasn’t going to like them in the future and going to do something now that she would regret later. And, so, we worked through that and I’ve been able to let that go quite a bit and just take those thoughts, and put them aside and say, “What a beautiful tattoo,” because I do like the four that she has right now. [giggles]

Christine: Oh, that’s awesome! Wonderful!

00:010:57

Jennifer: I think the other model that we worked through - another issue - which was her getting her first apartment.

Christine: Yes.

Jennifer: Moving out of the dorms and signing her first lease. And that was scary for me too ‘cause she goes to school in New York City, and so, you helped me work through that one too. And, I’m comfortable with it now because she is very responsible, and she can handle it. And like you said, “it could be wonderful.” 

Christine. Yes.

Jennifer: But again, I had thought three steps down the road, like “what if she has a bad landlord? You know, what’s X,Y, and Z, and she and I have talked about the precautions to take so that that doesn’t happen but I no longer dwell on those “what-if” - more negative, I guess, scenarios.

Christine: Excellent.

Jennifer: Worrisome scenarios. So, I think that was really helpful, too.

00:11:43 

Christine: Jennifer and I talked about how when we play out those scenarios in our thoughts - our mind is already living in an emotional state as if the scenarios are real. We already have all of the stress as if it has happened even though it hasn’t happened yet - and may never happen. Our mind is that powerful - and much of my coaching is about learning to use this amazing tool - our mind - for us rather than against us.

00:12:13

I then asked Jennifer if there were any surprise benefits to working with me.

Jennifer: I’ve got a couple thoughts on that. I think the surprise benefit for me was that working with you didn’t only help me with my daughter’s situation - the empty nest. The way that you’ve taught me to - and worked with me to get better at choosing the thoughts that I want to think and gaining more energy - it spilled over into other areas of my life. I can see myself having more energy, feeling better about my professional life - 

Christine: Wonderful.

Jennifer: I get glimpses of that now. This spills into other areas of your life. Including, like you and I discussed, the death of my mom and dad, and guilt about that, and as we get older and have college-age kids, we also have aging parents, and there were a lot of thoughts I was having in that regard: of guilt - not just the grief but also guilt that I didn’t do X, I didn’t do Y when they were alive, and so, actually, I was really surprised that those parts of my life would be affected too by working with you. 

I don’t think it’s just about the empty nest. I think it is about all the things surrounding it. 

Christine: It sounds like you would recommend this program.

Jennifer: Oh, yeah, absolutely. [laughs] I think so. I think so. Definitely. 

Christine: Thank you. Thank you so much. 

00:13:33

I want to jump in here and mention that Jennifer is right, what I teach works for all areas of your life. I’ve worked with non-empty nesters - I’ve even worked with those who don’t have children at all. I do focus on empty nesters because I identify easily with those adjusting to the empty nest, and I’m still in that stage myself currently. I understand the emotional turmoil that may be the reality for so many. Some women get to this stage and feel like they’ve reached the end of their life because their entire goal was to raise their children. Now they don’t know what to do. So, I’m here to remind them that they still have amazing years ahead of them and I enjoy having this little secret  (well, I guess it isn’t now) that what I teach will help with all areas of your life. 

I’m giving you something forever. [giggles]

Jennifer: Yes, I would agree with that for sure. 

It’s now that I looked at the questions that my Instagram audience had sent in for me to ask either myself or my client, and I had this interesting one.

00:14:32

“What’s the most evil thing you will do to a client?” I’m like, what? Why would you even ask that? 

[laughs]

I don’t know. On purpose? Like, what would I do? [laughs]

Jennifer: Send all the resources in one day. [laughs]

Christine: Oh my go-  that’s really funny. I really try not to do that. [laughs]

On a more serious note, we did get this question…

00:14:56

“How often would Christine talk to me - what does Coach Christine’s accountability look like: calls, texts, etc.”

Jennifer: Oh my goodness. That has been absolutely wonderful. I get frequent texts from Coach Christine, and I just love them because they come on Mondays - and they come at other times in the week - during the weekend too, and they say, “I’m still your coach.” So she’s there whenever you need her. And, I think that was, actually, one of the surprises I was going to say in the last answer that I gave. That that was also a surprise to me because I did expect us to meet once a week like the program says but I didn’t necessarily expect you to be there on text  - for me!

We just had a conversation about something earlier this week where I had a work experience that I wanted to kind of sort through with you - and we went back and forth about ten times. And you just didn’t stop answering me which I thought was really great. 

Christine: It was so interesting. 

Jennifer: It could have gone on longer even. Definitely, she’s incredibly responsive over text when you need her. And I’ve really appreciated that too. 

00:16:00

Christine: Oh, I’m glad! Here’s a really good question, and I think this is very good for you because you are a very busy woman. So, here’s the question, “I’m a busy Mom. How do I find time for coaching?"

Jennifer: It was tough, I have to say, but it’s worth it, and if you think about how much time it’s gonna save you in the long run, like, honestly, really, I think I’m more productive as a person and the half an hour a week, and then if you want to take advantage of the text, too, and the resources - I probably spent - you know you can spend as much time as you have on going through the resources.  Coach Christine was really patient with me because some weeks I didn’t have time to go through all of the resources, so I might have gone slower than the average client. Some weeks I might have gone maybe a little bit faster - and that was totally okay with her. That part of it I wouldn’t worry about. And then if you think about it - it’s setting aside a half an hour for a conversation. 

I do think, you know, plan on setting aside at least an hour a week to go through the resources - she might suggest more.

Christine: No, that’s fair, that’s fair. 

Jennifer: As a busy person, sometimes I would do like an hour over the weekend, maybe an hour during the week, or a couple of hours in both directions. There were other days where I’d sit there and go through them for three hours. But the point is, is that it’s flexible and it’s not rigid so you don’t have to spend two hours a day doing the work. 

You should spend some time doing the work but it’s really manageable. Like I said, I’m a busy professional and I probably work in my professional life about 50+ hours a week, and so I get that. But for me it was doable, and I think you can make time for it because it will be well worth it in the end.

 

00:17:47

Christine: We had another bold question from Instagram, “Can I move in with you?” No. [laughs]

Jennifer: That would be nice. It would be nice to have you as a next door neighbor.

Christine: Awww, that would be nice. 

Jennifer: Yeah.

Christine: The feeling is mutual, actually. 

Jennifer: We can sit on the porch.

Christine: You are quite impressive, Jennifer. 

Jennifer: Well, so are you, and even more so. I think you have way more energy than I do -

Christine: You said that when we first met. I remember that was one of the first things you said to me. 

Jennifer: Yeah, I was low on energy. I was burning out. 

Christine: You have so much more energy now. 

Jennifer: I do. I have more energy.

Christine: Than you did. And your life isn’t less stressful, I would say - 

Jennifer: No, it’s not. 

Christine: Yeah. 

Jennifer: But I do feel like I have more energy. I really do. I was, you know, I was in a burnt out kind of place when we first started working together. I’m just really grateful that I’m not there anymore.

00:18:37

Christine: Jennifer and I spoke for a few minutes about why when we do this work, we feel we have more energy...you where you are now you see how all these thoughts in our head - it’s the clutter - and you see it in a house when you have clutter all over your house

Jennifer: Yes, exactly. 

Christine: and how it’s draining. And to me, it’s very clear in someone’s mind it’s the same thing, but it’s so hard to get to a point where someone understands that. 

Jennifer: And I had so much clutter in my mind - all the time that I would go to one room and I would forget what I was doing, and I thought it was age-related because I’m slightly over 50 years old, but I really think a lot of it had to do with the clutter: you know, always misplacing my phone, forgetting what I went to this room for, you know forgetting what I was doing [giggle] or supposed to do going from room to room. And I think once you get rid of that clutter, you can focus on what you’re doing at that given moment.

Christine: Yes. It is so powerful.

Jennifer: And so my focus has increased in work too. Not only forgetting what I’m going to the room for so that’s been a benefit. And I think that is one reason why some of my time has freed up a bit.

00:19:48

Christine: Jennifer was adventurous enough to answer the four questions I ask all of my guests..  my listeners know, I don’t have guests often but when I do I like to ask these fun questions: so, waffles or pancakes?

Jennifer: Waffles, definitely.

Christine: Any reason? 

Jennifer: Oh, man, I love the way the syrup collects in the little square things. 

Christine: Mmm.

Jennifer: [giggle] and they don’t get as soggy as quickly as pancakes. 

00:20:13

Christine: What is one item you couldn’t live without and why?

Jennifer: Does it have to be a physical item? 

Christine: No. 

Jennifer: Well, my family, obviously. That’s the obvious -well you can live without them, I mean but that’s not - uh - yeah.

Christine: Oh. 

Jennifer: I don’t want to go there. 

Christine: We hear her working through her thoughts, right? 

Jennifer: Yeah. I don’t want to go there. I don’t want to go there. I was going to say my phone if it has to be a physical item but I grew up without a cell phone, so I’m gonna say my glasses ‘cause I like to read and I don’t see very well without them. Or, diet coke with ice - that’s one of my vices: I drink too much diet coke with ice.

00:20:55

Christine: And Jennifer has these lovely purple glasses. My audience won’t see them but they’re very cool. All time favorite movie? 

Jennifer: It’s a Wonderful Life.

Christine: Awww. 

Jennifer: Yeah. 

Christine: So, I could guess but what’s your reason? 

Jennifer: I think it’s about valuing what you have in the moment and not looking at what could have been or what you’ve lost but I’ve always loved that movie but now that you say it, “What’s my reason?” it fits really well with the kind of work you do, and we do, as well, with you. 

Christine. It does. 

Jennifer: It fits really well. 

I always torture my kids on Christmas that they have to watch that one with me. Yeah, I love that movie. 

00:21:31

Christine: Alright and my final fun question: You have one hour of alone time. No one's gonna bother you. What’s your go to thing to do?

Jennifer: Play piano or sing. I sing worse than I play piano so probably sing because nobody would be around to hear me so I can belt out my show tunes. 

Christine: Oh my gosh. Alto? Soprano? 

Jennifer: Alto, for sure. 

Christine: So, I’m a soprano. When we’re neighbors, we can do duets. 

Jennifer: Oh, you are? Oh, that would be awesome. That would be great.

Christine: [giggles] How did I not know this about you? 

Well this is great!

Jennifer: Thank you so much. 

Christine: I don’t want to take up any more time. Is there anything else you want to share before we wrap up?

Jennifer: No. Just that I highly recommend you. You’re awesome. Like you tell us. You’re awesome, too. 

Christine: Awww. You’re all amazing. I love it. Well, thanks for sharing. Thank you for trusting me to be your coach. It means the world to me. Thanks for being here. 

Jennifer: Pleasure to do it. 

00:22:26

[computer game level up music (short)] 

New Things. New Things. New Things!

It looks like hubby and I’s nest won’t be super empty for the next year - possibly. While our daughter was accepted into two grad schools for the programs she hoped and dreamed for - the financials aren’t lining up to make that a reality so as of today, she’ll be home with us in our new, smaller space. Cozy days ahead! That being said, plans are changing by the day, so I wouldn’t be overly shocked if this plan changes a few more times. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited about having her home for a bit since we did miss out on a few years of a traditional education. Her graduating from college at the age of 17 has been quite a journey for all of us. I may fill you in a bit more on the home sale and our why about that but with my family being more private than I am, I want to chat with them about how much they are okay with me sharing on this podcast. It’s all good. Don’t worry.

Of course, since we heard from my client Jennifer, it is worth noting that I have a few remaining private coaching spots open in April. I’d love to work with you!

I’m going to skip some of my regular segments in this episode this week since I interviewed Jennifer but we must, of course first celebrate our wins!

00:23:42

[computer game level up music (short)]  

Celebrating You and Your Wins[sound] 

My win? Setting some boundaries for social media and email requests during this busy month.

As for your wins, I’m happy to share the last two weeks of wins from TikTok and Instagram! See my show notes to click through to view these wins and cheer everyone on. As always, please forgive any mispronunciations:

Rachel shared, “I’ve taken my ADHD medication consistently for almost a week!”

Rachelbeth shared,”This week I set a boundary with my employer about my compensation! They were super nice about it, but it was really hard to do.”

Aiden: “I submitted my junior paper last night!” 

Ryann:  “I dumped my toxic ass boyfriend like I should have a year ago!” 

Sunny day: “Going on a vacation to help my mental health.”

Meghan H:  “I went to the last day of a class that I hate, I never have to go back and I’m so happy.”

Miss Mystery: I got a 100% on my math test.

MissBoyce: Pressing on despite troubling past situations.

TalkShitWithP shares, “My Mama just got appointed as the new Member of the Tanzanian Parliament and Minister of Foreign Affairs as of an hour ago!” 

What? Okay, Paula is kind enough to give us an article that we can click through and read this. This is truly awesome.

An Anonymous TikTokker shared, “We talked to my boyfriend’s family about him moving out with me and they took it great. I was so scared about it. They even offered us their couches (so they could get new ones) and were super supportive. 

Thank you all for sharing your wins. Now my listener, it is your turn to think about a recent win in your life. Got it? Stand up  - if you aren’t already and give yourself a round of applause. Go ahead. I’d love for you to share that win as an audio message for my next podcast episode, or on my socials by adding a microphone emoji to your comment. Go, you!

00:25:41

[happy music (short)] 

Two Questions for You

Question 1:  Do you relate to anything Jennifer shared today?  

and Question 2:  What thought-delivery in your mind do you need to sort or clear out?  

As always, I provide content to make you think, my empty nest friend.

My HOPE is that I’m able to provide you with thoughts that positively impact your life.

If you enjoy this podcast please don’t forget to share it with others, it’s the best way to allow it to reach a wider audience. And of course, follow or subscribe in your favorite podcast app!

I plan to be back with episode 134 in two weeks. In the meantime, you have 132 other episodes, from me, to catch up on, or relisten to. 

Before I go, I’m going to bring Jennifer back: My empty nest friend, Jennifer and I want to remind you today that you are amazing!

See ya!

00:26:43

[bloopers]

00:27:00

Still listening?

Podcast studio in my car?  In my script I said, “this is a thing I’m considering.” Actually, I’m sitting here in my car, recording all of the parts that weren’t the interview. So how does it sound? I wonder how this is working out? We are moving into a smaller space and this - this what I’m testing, very well may be the perfect solution. I drive to a park, record, and it’s better than the sound in my house. I think. What do you think?

If you want videos on how I’m setting my car up so that it works, I do have some on TikTok. I think I’ve posted some on Instagram. Super fun. And I can warm-up like crazy because no one is around.. Bbbbbwwwww - have a great day!

[end music]

[end]